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Forum -> Children's Health
My poor son- please help!



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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:04 pm
My son is almost 8 years old and still has poop accidents in his pants.
He is deeply ashamed and says he can't control it.
This is the second time in camp (in 3 weeks) that hes pooped in his pants and came home with the poop still there.
He is too ashamed to ask to call home.
He is too ashamed to pack a spare set of underwear and pants.

What can this be? How can I help him?

All my online research said he must be constipated but his poops are not hard or painful and he poops pretty regularly.

anon to respect his privacy.
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Kiwi Bubby




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:06 pm
He has encopresis. It’s more common than you think.

https://www.mayoclinic.org/dis.....54500

Speak to your doctor. There is help out there.
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amother
Lawngreen


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:07 pm
Gluten and dairy intolerance can cause sensory issues that make a kid not feel their bowels...
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amother
Emerald


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:07 pm
It’s almost always a constipation/ not emptying enough issue. Pls pls take him to his doc and remind your son that this is a medical issue and not his fault. So sorry for him and you, so helpless!
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amother
Pewter


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:09 pm
Why would you wait till age 8 to take care of this? I’m not judging, just honestly trying to understand.
Take him to a good pediatrician. Not just any.
If he is cooperative try taking him off gluten and dairy for a month.
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:10 pm
My son had this from age 6-8. They grow out of it. The part that peeks out is typically soft.
Speak to your dr. Even if he can’t help he can reassure it that it is normal.
Kids grow out of it without changing their diet. It’s a bad idea to change the diet of a growing kid without a medical reason.
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amother
Lemon


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:36 pm
It's only an accident if they do it on purpose.
I think in this case he doesn't feel it coming till it's too late. There's a term for it, I forgot what it's called.
It can definitely be constipated even if it looks regular.
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2020, 9:42 pm
Does he have normal accessible bathrooms in school?
Is he embarrassed to use it there?
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 2:15 am
In cases like this, if a kid is really interested in something, they won't be aware that they have to go until after they've already gone.

A watch with regular alarms can be a lifesaver, and get him into a healthy schedule.

He may need his colon to be completely cleared out before he can be expected to start feeling body cues again. If there is impacted matter, feces can still go around it and it will look like he's not constipated. As long as the impaction is there, it's going to be sending conflicting messages to his brain.

I think a couple of months without gluten or dairy is not going to be dangerous for a kid. It might just be what he needs to help reset his system. Take him off of those foods, and let him eat all the watermelon he wants. The liquid and fiber of the melon will take care of the rest. I have pretty bad IBS, and this helps me more than anything else. It's a cheap and easy fix, without any chemical laxatives or expensive specialist doctors. If it doesn't work, no harm is done, and you can go on to more intensive treatments.
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heidi




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 2:38 am
No one has mentioned this, but at age 8, if there's not a medical issue, it can be an emotional issue. Please take him for a medical exam and then straight to a therapist.
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 7:57 am
I know so well what you are feeling op!!! How much I cried with my son!!!
My son is almost nine and we are on the way of the" redemption". During the corona ,I called his pediatrician who explained me what to do .
"He has to go after each meal 20min on the toilet With no books and games.He has to be trained again..."
I spoke with my son about the importance of this.That is for Him . That he is suffering about this...So he will have to be a big boy ,and to stay 20min and to make...
I also add 5 min when he wakes up...
At the beginning I had to remind him everytime ,and gave him a price after !
After few weeks I gave the price only if he goes by himself!
And after I told him 10/15min is ok...

My son is much much better !
It's not 100%,and your post remind me to go back to the pediatrician...
Don't desesperate,be strong!
I would be you , I would start by the pediatrician....
Love😘
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 8:03 am
[quote="amother [ Pewter ]"]Why would you wait till age 8 to take care of this? I’m not judging, "

Why do you need to write this!!!???
Why do you think she did nothing till now!?!
Ask a friend.. Google.....

"just honestly trying to understand. "

No you don't!you need to break her !!!!

"Take him to a good pediatrician. Not just any.
If he is cooperative try taking him off gluten and dairy for a month"

You could have just write this!!!
Please think twice before you write something!!!
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simcha2




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 8:17 am
With encopresis (essentially very bad constipation) the stool that comes out is soft. It is moving around the hard stool.

Please take him to the pediatrician. It can probably be solved with laxatives, but may need a small procedure to disempact him.

Have you given him laxatives in the past? Have you spoken to the pediatrician about this?
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amother
Bronze


 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 8:28 am
I was also convinced my daughter was not constipated because she was pooping regularly and it looked normal. My pediatrician explained that there could be hard poop stuck inside and this new poop is coming out around it but until we fix the issue she will not be able to feel when she needs the bathroom. There are a few ways to fix it we went with 3 days of enemas and then daily Miralax. Bh it helped almost instantly.

If he is saying he can't feel it he might be right. I would speak to his pediatrician to see what he recommends and perhaps also take him for a couple of therapy sessions to help him deal with the shame.
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Frenchfry




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 8:49 am
Dystended rectum.

We did this!

A glycerine suppository solved it!

Before you take him off gluten, or retrain, try it.

Then, once you've cleared him out, keep him on a stool softener.

I called my pediatrician at the time, and followed these instructions. No need even for an office visit.
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imasoftov




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 3:32 pm
amother [ Lemon ] wrote:
It's only an accident if they do it on purpose.

That seems like an odd use of the word "accident". Wikipedia on Toilet training says that accidents are "periodic episodes of urinary or fecal incontinence" and both sorts of incontinence are "involuntary".
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mrs me




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 3:41 pm
amother [ Bronze ] wrote:
I was also convinced my daughter was not constipated because she was pooping regularly and it looked normal. My pediatrician explained that there could be hard poop stuck inside and this new poop is coming out around it but until we fix the issue she will not be able to feel when she needs the bathroom. There are a few ways to fix it we went with 3 days of enemas and then daily Miralax. Bh it helped almost instantly.

If he is saying he can't feel it he might be right. I would speak to his pediatrician to see what he recommends and perhaps also take him for a couple of therapy sessions to help him deal with the shame.


This is called encopresis and a few ppl mentioned this earlier... it was also my first thought !

My niece had this many years ago and this past year I had a student (preschool) who kept having dirty accidents... her mother thought it was anxiety .. I told her take her to the doctor and ask about encopresis and I was right! A few laxatives did the trick and that was the end of it !

I would talk to doctor about this before changing his diet for no reason
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amother
Wheat


 

Post Thu, Jul 30 2020, 4:03 pm
I just want to echo what others said. I also thought my daughter was pooping normally but x-rays ended up showing otherwise and now she's on laxatives...
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