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Maternity leave + vacation a few weeks later- is it ethical?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:10 am
Anon b/c I discussed this in person ad naseaum Wink

Im BH due end of January and I'll be taking a a few weeks off for maternity leave. Apparently its now 21 weeks for maternity leave in NY? I dont have that option so I'll probably take off a month if possible. Now, assuming the world bezH gets back to normal and travel restrictions are lifted, DH and I would really like to go away for Pesach. Of course this is all hypothetical.

Now my question is, is it ethical to then go away for a week and a half for pesach, if in January I'd be taking a month off with the baby? So I'd be out of work February, be back working March for the few 3 weeks and then leave maybe a few days before April (before pesach break).

This is my first baby so I'm just curious how maternity leave + vacation works. Are they related? Separate? Is it unethical?

Thanks!
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amother




Orange
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:14 am
I did this the first baby, I was a teacher and told the principal I'm adding some vacation days onto sukkos bc I won't be able to fly during our January yeshiva week. We went to Israel and then I took my maternity leave in February. Obviously she was OK with it and I was already 5 months ish at the time so I was okay telling her.

You don't rlly have to plan it now except to book refundable tickets. You can ask your employer for permission closer to sukkos when it will also be apparent that you're expecting a maternity leave.

Something else you might consider is saving vacation days to tack onto maternity leave. (BTW NYC minimum should be 6 weeks or 8 with a c section)
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amother




Turquoise
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:14 am
Do you mean Succos or Pesach?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:17 am
amother [ Turquoise ] wrote:
Do you mean Succos or Pesach?


ahh fixed it thanks for catching that!
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:19 am
amother [ Orange ] wrote:
I did this the first baby, I was a teacher and told the principal I'm adding some vacation days onto sukkos bc I won't be able to fly during our January yeshiva week. We went to Israel and then I took my maternity leave in February. Obviously she was OK with it and I was already 5 months ish at the time so I was okay telling her.

You don't rlly have to plan it now except to book refundable tickets. You can ask your employer for permission closer to sukkos when it will also be apparent that you're expecting a maternity leave.

Something else you might consider is saving vacation days to tack onto maternity leave. (BTW NYC minimum should be 6 weeks or 8 with a c section)


So vacation days are separate from maternity leave?
Yes we'd like to go to Israel for pesach so would need to leave a few days before the school goes on break.

How soon do I have to ask/tell my employer I'll be taking maternity leave? This is a new job btw

Btw just reread your post.. you went away for sukkos and then took off in February for maternity leave. Feel like that gave you enough time at the job to be liked and make a good impression etc. Id be taking maternity leave february and then leaving end of march for a week or two. Its not as if theres a few months of working in between :/
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amother




Ginger
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:31 am
You need to ask your employer. I have a great employee but she has been nagging mr about vacation days and she is due in a month. I personally will not be considering her for a raise because I'd expect her to understand that it's not appropriate to ask for a vacation so close to your due date. Some companies have policies and require you plan your vacation months in advance while others don't care.
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nchr




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:32 am
OP - No, it's not an appropriate time for a vacation.
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sky




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:39 am
I don’t know ny law.
In nj you can break up family leave.
So when I had a baby close to pesach I took leave by birth and then the second part by pesach coming in a bit in between to be available to help. I explained this to them before my leave.
If you know you will be taking an extended vacation I wouldn’t take an extended/maximum maternity leave so close.
For sure look like you want to help as much as possible and accommodate. I would be open about your plans so they can plan.

Something to keep in mind - some companies make you take your accrued vacation days for maternity. If you are having a baby January and accrue 1 week vacation 1st quarter they may make you use it then and you will have no vacation days for pesach. Depending on who was in HR by diff pregnancies I’ve had that issue.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:40 am
Thank you for answering.
Does it change your answer is I would only be missing 2 days of work to go on vacation? The school is closed during chol hamoed and I would leave late at night after work so I don't miss too much work.

Also, just because I'm curious, maternity leave is considered like vacation? Its not really by choice that a women needs to take off a week or two to take care of the baby, whereas a vacation is a choice. Again just curious!! Dont have anyone else to ask and this website is great Smile
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sky




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:52 am
I think if you take 6 weeks in January then taking 2 weeks in April it isn’t so bad. As I said look into it - you may be able to take it as your 21 week maternity leave split up (depending on your state laws). (Originally I thought you meant 21 week leave in January)
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:56 am
sky wrote:
I think if you take 6 weeks in January then taking 2 weeks in April it isn’t so bad. As I said look into it - you may be able to take it as your 21 week maternity leave split up (depending on your state laws). (Originally I thought you meant 21 week leave in January)


I dont think I would take off 6 weeks. I still need student teaching hours and I want to finish my license ASAP so I think I'd take off a month if that. Also, this is all hypothetical because I've never had a baby so idk how I'll even react lol/be able to handle the changes! I'm a big planner so I try to plan my life ahead of time... not the best but it works sometimes when I can be better informed and prepared Smile

How do I began to look into the state laws? Just a quick google searhc? Or depends on my agency?
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sky




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 10:57 am
I checked - my allows you to take intermittent bonding leave within first year of when baby is born.
You could take pesach as bonding time leave - but will only be paid something like 50% of your salary.
https://paidfamilyleave.ny.gov.....child
You need to give 30 day notice.
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amother




Lilac
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:07 am
You don't get paid maternity leave in America?
In Israel we have 14 weeks fully paid leave. It's the law, it's mandatory to give it. I don't know of any woman who didn't take it, except for maybe a few very high powered CEOs who shared it with their dhs (also an option here).

I don't understand. What do you mean, you can't afford maternity leave more than a month? Is the US so far behind the rest of the western world that they don't offer a few month paid maternity leave?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:13 am
amother [ Lilac ] wrote:
You don't get paid maternity leave in America?
In Israel we have 14 weeks fully paid leave. It's the law, it's mandatory to give it. I don't know of any woman who didn't take it, except for maybe a few very high powered CEOs who shared it with their dhs (also an option here).

I don't understand. What do you mean, you can't afford maternity leave more than a month? Is the US so far behind the rest of the western world that they don't offer a few month paid maternity leave?


Im not joking you when I say I have no idea! Im trying to educate myself now while Im not working on all the laws, strollers, breastfeeding classes etc. Idk ANYTHING.
When I said "I cant afford maternity leave" I meant it in a way that I can't afford missing out on hours. I need contact hours with kids to finish my license so I want to do that asap
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amother




Seafoam
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:14 am
I live in Toronto and I will be iyH taking a year maternity leave. (We can take 12-18 months maternity leave. Employers do not expect you back before 1 year.) Reading this thread is making me feel so bad. Op, I think it's ok to take 4 weeks maternity leave and then take of for Pesach. But what do I know really, feels like Im coming from a completely different culture.
I am planning on taking off for sukkos, then my office closes for 2 weeks for "holiday season" in December and then I'm starting my maternity leave in January IyH.
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amother




Puce
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:15 am
One month maternity leave is very very little. You can't know how you'd feel then and if you'll even be able to go back to work. Rather take a longer maternity leave.
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amother




Turquoise
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:17 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you for answering.
Does it change your answer is I would only be missing 2 days of work to go on vacation? The school is closed during chol hamoed and I would leave late at night after work so I don't miss too much work.

Also, just because I'm curious, maternity leave is considered like vacation? Its not really by choice that a women needs to take off a week or two to take care of the baby, whereas a vacation is a choice. Again just curious!! Dont have anyone else to ask and this website is great Smile


Did you mention it’s student teaching? Then you might have to take it up with your supervisor. If it’s only 2 days that you’ll miss it’s probably ok, but if this is a new job it’s still a lot of time missed your first year.
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baby12x




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:19 am
amother [ Lilac ] wrote:
You don't get paid maternity leave in America?
In Israel we have 14 weeks fully paid leave. It's the law, it's mandatory to give it. I don't know of any woman who didn't take it, except for maybe a few very high powered CEOs who shared it with their dhs (also an option here).

I don't understand. What do you mean, you can't afford maternity leave more than a month? Is the US so far behind the rest of the western world that they don't offer a few month paid maternity leave?


This is correct. There is no mandated maternity leave.
This means that legally companies do not have to pay you a dime when you take maternity leave.
There are some laws about not firing people who take maternity leave and you can apply for some disability in certain states.
There are companies who offer paid maternity leave as a perk.
I personally do not know a single person who received more than 2 weeks paid maternity leave.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:19 am
amother [ Seafoam ] wrote:
I live in Toronto and I will be iyH taking a year maternity leave. (We can take 12-18 months maternity leave. Employers do not expect you back before 1 year.) Reading this thread is making me feel so bad. Op, I think it's ok to take 4 weeks maternity leave and then take of for Pesach. But what do I know really, feels like Im coming from a completely different culture.
I am planning on taking off for sukkos, then my office closes for 2 weeks for "holiday season" in December and then I'm starting my maternity leave in January IyH.


dont feel bad Smile
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amother




OP
 

Post  Wed, Aug 05 2020, 11:20 am
amother [ Turquoise ] wrote:
Did you mention it’s student teaching? Then you might have to take it up with your supervisor. If it’s only 2 days that you’ll miss it’s probably ok, but if this is a new job it’s still a lot of time missed your first year.


Im not a teacher, Im a therapist. Dont want to say what kind because I really discussed this with a lot of people in person. The only way Im "penalized" for missing so many days of work is not getting my clinical hours which means I would have to extend my clinicals for this year but people do it.
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