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Maternity leave + vacation a few weeks later- is it ethical?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 11:42 am
nchr wrote:
Because you do not take a vacation just a few weeks after having been missing from work for a considerable amount of time. It's not appropriate and would reflect poorly on your work ethic and responsibility.


By having a quick glance at the calendar the vacation would only entitle me missing a friday and a monday so I don't think its inappropriate IMHO to miss a day before YT if anyway the school is closed during chol hamoed. Also I think I could split up the maternity leave like another poster mentioned so I cant get penalized for that
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nchr




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 12:26 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
By having a quick glance at the calendar the vacation would only entitle me missing a friday and a monday so I don't think its inappropriate IMHO to miss a day before YT if anyway the school is closed during chol hamoed. Also I think I could split up the maternity leave like another poster mentioned so I cant get penalized for that


As an employer, missing a Monday and a Friday, especially if one is the day before and day after we will be closed, is a BIG deal. It definitely reflects poorly on work ethic. I don't take maternity leave beyond 2 or 3 days because I want my workers (only have a few so it is a small office) to see that level of commitment so that they won't think "oh it's just a Monday here and there."

If my worker had a baby I would not think poorly of them taking a legitimate maternity leave (I just don't do it to create a particular type of an atmosphere), but I expect to know several months beforehand and I clarify that with the employee at the time of hiring.


Last edited by nchr on Thu, Aug 06 2020, 12:30 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 12:29 pm
nchr wrote:
As an employer, missing a Monday and a Friday, especially if one is the day before and day after we will be closed, is a BIG deal. It definitely reflects poorly on work ethic.


I am giving this serious thought (although its hard for me to forfeit the chance of possibly seeing my family since my wedding).

My friend worked for this agency before and she told me its frum/and very chilled. Not sure what that means though! Guess I'll see if they even plan on opening...
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nchr




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 12:30 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I am giving this serious thought (although its hard for me to forfeit the chance of possibly seeing my family since my wedding).

My friend worked for this agency before and she told me its frum/and very chilled. Not sure what that means though! Guess I'll see if they even plan on opening...


Only you know what the employer will think, or how much you care about your employer thinks...
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amother




Burlywood
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 12:47 pm
Commenting as a fellow therapist. Personally, I extended my clinical fellowship year (finished it in 1.5 years, instead of 1 year), and it was no problem. Check out the extension options... (ask your supervisor).

Secondly, you mentioned it's a frum, chilled agency. I've worked for those. These types of employers can afford to be more flexible and usually don't mind an extra day off or two.

It's not like being the only secretary in a business, where the boss is breathing down your neck demanding you not miss a single day extra. I think there's more flexibility than you think.
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octopus




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 12:56 pm
I think you are getting a lot of answers from people in the corporate world. Working as a therapist is not the same pace. No one tells their employer at the end of the first trimester they are expecting. Most wait until 5th month. And most contracts will specifically state just give them 6-8 weeks prior to due date. And usually you can make up hours that you miss so taking off a day or two even after a maternity leave should be OK. People go into these fields because of flexibility. And things come up being a parent. And if you have a good track record, its usually OK.

Edited to fix spelling


Last edited by octopus on Thu, Aug 06 2020, 1:27 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother




Burlywood
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 1:00 pm
[quote="nchr"]As an employer, missing a Monday and a Friday, especially if one is the day before and day after we will be closed, is a BIG deal.

This is for an office. Therapists have more flexibility.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 1:54 pm
amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:
Commenting as a fellow therapist. Personally, I extended my clinical fellowship year (finished it in 1.5 years, instead of 1 year), and it was no problem. Check out the extension options... (ask your supervisor).

Secondly, you mentioned it's a frum, chilled agency. I've worked for those. These types of employers can afford to be more flexible and usually don't mind an extra day off or two.

It's not like being the only secretary in a business, where the boss is breathing down your neck demanding you not miss a single day extra. I think there's more flexibility than you think.


I guess I gave myself away as a CF Wink

Yes I dont think its a big deal to push off my CFY by a few months especially if I wont be having a full case load in September due to IFSP/IEP meetings. Am I able to PM you?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 1:56 pm
octopus wrote:
I think you are getting a lot of answers from people in the corporate world. Working as a therapist is not the same pace. No one tells their employer at the end of the first trimester they are expecting. Most wait until 5th month. And most contracts will specifically state just give them 6-8 weeks prior to due date. And usually you can make up hours that you miss so taking off a day or two even after a maternity leave should be OK. People go into these fields because of flexibility. And things come up being a parent. And if you have a good track record, its usually OK.

Edited to fix spelling


That's what I thought before I even posted this question, and I've asked around different therapists and that's what I was told...
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singleagain




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Aug 06 2020, 10:35 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Oh interesting ok... hmm.
Why would I go to medical appointments during work hours though?


For many people that's the only time they have. Unless they work part time or have flexible hours, when else are you supposed to go to the doctor. Especially if your doctor had limited hours.
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amother




Green
 

Post  Fri, Aug 07 2020, 12:52 am
Just wanted to chime in
I had my first during grad school. Came back after a week (would have come sooner but my frum classmates insisted I should wait until after the bris!) and BH everything was fine. Got straight A’s (baby was happy being snuggled while I studied) and bonded well with him. I did sacrifice breastfeeding, feeling too new to motherhood in general to also tack on breastfeeding and serious pumping in random college bathrooms between classes. No regrets. Breastfeed all the rest successfully and feel comfortable that I made the right decision for me at that time in my life. BH graduated on time with a degree that enables us to pay full tuition for our kiddies BH.
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amother




Green
 

Post  Fri, Aug 07 2020, 1:44 am
And one more comment. I had an epidural and a smooth delivery. A couple of stitches. They didn’t bother me after beyond 3-4 days if I recall correctly. I really felt completely fine. Way more myself with my usual energy and need to do and accomplish as compared to the pregnancy. Don’t make yourself crazy with the doula and natural birth thing for a better recovery. If you want it in general, kol hakavod. But specifically to enable you to recover better post birth, no reason to bother or put extra pressure on yourself.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Fri, Aug 07 2020, 12:42 pm
amother [ Green ] wrote:
And one more comment. I had an epidural and a smooth delivery. A couple of stitches. They didn’t bother me after beyond 3-4 days if I recall correctly. I really felt completely fine. Way more myself with my usual energy and need to do and accomplish as compared to the pregnancy. Don’t make yourself crazy with the doula and natural birth thing for a better recovery. If you want it in general, kol hakavod. But specifically to enable you to recover better post birth, no reason to bother or put extra pressure on yourself.


Thanks for sharing your experience...I guess I will only find out after how I'll deal with the recovery!

Thanks everyone that posted and gave advice
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2gether




 
 
 
 

Post  Sat, Aug 08 2020, 4:49 pm
I have a very high work ethic and I don't think and extra 2 days is such of an issue.
Maternity leave and vacations are unrelated, it also depends your attendence the rest of the year, just tell them enough in advance
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amother




Turquoise
 

Post  Sat, Aug 08 2020, 10:46 pm
octopus wrote:
I think you are getting a lot of answers from people in the corporate world. Working as a therapist is not the same pace. No one tells their employer at the end of the first trimester they are expecting. Most wait until 5th month. And most contracts will specifically state just give them 6-8 weeks prior to due date. And usually you can make up hours that you miss so taking off a day or two even after a maternity leave should be OK. People go into these fields because of flexibility. And things come up being a parent. And if you have a good track record, its usually OK.

Edited to fix spelling


I’m a therapist who works in schools. I always tell at the end of the first trimester so they have time to find a replacement. But also the students are mandated therapy so missing days to go on vacation is frowned upon. The students will really miss out.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Aug 09 2020, 12:27 am
2gether wrote:
I have a very high work ethic and I don't think and extra 2 days is such of an issue.
Maternity leave and vacations are unrelated, it also depends your attendence the rest of the year, just tell them enough in advance


I also have a high work and school ethic, I hated missing school even if I was sick I would push myself to go. I am always punctual and get my work done in advance! I was just curious if missing 2 days for vacation and then the weeks for maternity leave make me a bad person lol
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Aug 09 2020, 12:28 am
amother [ Turquoise ] wrote:
I’m a therapist who works in schools. I always tell at the end of the first trimester so they have time to find a replacement. But also the students are mandated therapy so missing days to go on vacation is frowned upon. The students will really miss out.


End of first trimester? Wow I can't imagine telling early but I think Ill say something 2 months in advance based on others advice from this thread.
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art




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Aug 09 2020, 11:52 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I guess I gave myself away as a CF Wink

Yes I dont think its a big deal to push off my CFY by a few months especially if I wont be having a full case load in September due to IFSP/IEP meetings. Am I able to PM you?


Yes, you can PM me.
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