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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
If you are Chassidish, do you take your sons to the beach?
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:18 am
specifically asking about 10-12 year olds
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amother
Cerulean


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:19 am
No.
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amother
White


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:19 am
Nope.
4 year old oldest.
Even my daughter that I do take asks about why so many guys don't wear shirts.
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amother
Pink


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:23 am
No. Unless he was under 3 years old. And I wouldn't go to a mixed beach anyway, only women only (and I find it disrespectful when women bring their older sons during women's hours)
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:30 am
I’m RWMO and my husband wouldn’t Bring a son that age to a beach!!
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amother
Mint


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:40 am
I have an 11 year old and nooo!!! Not taking anymore to beaches whereas my 5 year old I would .
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amother
Mustard


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:42 am
Not chassidish
I would in the evening - non commercial beach - if beach is quiet. But they know if we can’t find a quiet area we just go home. It has happened.
Starting from age 4/5.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:45 am
amother [ Pink ] wrote:
No. Unless he was under 3 years old. And I wouldn't go to a mixed beach anyway, only women only (and I find it disrespectful when women bring their older sons during women's hours)


Off topic, but how do you feel when women bring 8, 9, even 10 year old boys into public bathrooms? The moms take over the handicap stalls, and make the boys face into the corner. Confused

I can understand if the boy is special needs, but usually it's because of "stranger danger panic." I find it incredibly uncomfortable when that happens. I feel bad for the poor kid, too.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:46 am
I don't take girls or boys to the beach in the summer or crowded busy seasons. I don't want my girls to see pritzus just like I don't want my boys to see pritzus.
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Stars




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 8:59 am
June July august September - no to girls and boys. Other months depends on the weather. If it’s cool enough and there won’t be any shirtless people I would. We’ve gone chol hamoed some years and it was fine. The kids didn’t play in the water but they’re happy enough for the sand experience and the view.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:02 am
Stars wrote:
June July august September - no to girls and boys. Other months depends on the weather. If it’s cool enough and there won’t be any shirtless people I would. We’ve gone chol hamoed some years and it was fine. The kids didn’t play in the water but they’re happy enough for the sand experience and the view.


This. We are chassidish, but we go only to 'quiet' beaches, at 'quiet' times.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:12 am
I respect people’s choices to keep their DCs away from beaches.

Personally, I am JPF and take my kids to the beach. We go for the sand, sea air and to swim in the sea, not to notice other people’s state of dress. We try to avoid crowds anyway (even pre-Corona) and I find by not making a big deal about chests and bikinis and half-naked people, nobody else does either. Sometimes drawing attention to Pritzus can IMHO have the opposite intended effect. My kids have never asked me about anybody’s state of undress or body parts on the beach.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:17 am
amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:
I respect people’s choices to keep their DCs away from beaches.

Personally, I am JPF and take my kids to the beach. We go for the sand, sea air and to swim in the sea, not to notice other people’s state of dress. We try to avoid crowds anyway (even pre-Corona) and I find by not making a big deal about chests and bikinis and half-naked people, nobody else does either. Sometimes drawing attention to Pritzus can IMHO have the opposite intended effect. My kids have never asked me about anybody’s state of undress or body parts on the beach.


That's why OP specifically asked for Chassidish input. It's an entirely different world.

I'm not judging you at all, I'm a BT who spent every weekend of my teens on the beach in Santa Cruz (mostly smoking weed!) Hypnotized

Just saying that Chassidish/Charedi people, especially FFB, come from a very different point of view.
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crust




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:21 am
No. They would be upset at me.

To be honest I feel that the state of the beaches has gone downhill in the last 20 years. There was always pritzus but the current code of dress was not accepted back then.

I would go to a quiet beach. A person here or there not within immediate view wouldn't be an issue. (haha, that's what I think but I never tried with my boys...)

Amother jetblack there are people that are more perceptive and/or sensitive.
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Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:22 am
I mostly avoid beaches with the kids because oh, the sand!!!
But I’d probably leave it up to dh to decide.
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amother
Mustard


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:31 am
amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:
I respect people’s choices to keep their DCs away from beaches.

Personally, I am JPF and take my kids to the beach. We go for the sand, sea air and to swim in the sea, not to notice other people’s state of dress. We try to avoid crowds anyway (even pre-Corona) and I find by not making a big deal about chests and bikinis and half-naked people, nobody else does either. Sometimes drawing attention to Pritzus can IMHO have the opposite intended effect. My kids have never asked me about anybody’s state of undress or body parts on the beach.


Your teenage sons don’t notice women in bikinis?
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amother
Denim


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:34 am
Chassidish, and my son is 4.
We take him along, don’t know until what age.
I never made an issue about clothing.
He sees me getting dressed sometimes, and never asked questions about other peoples dress codes.
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:51 am
Just an interesting note that Rav Shimshen Pincus z"l said that one has to be more careful with guarding the eyes of girls than of boys. I cant remember the explanation why but he explained his reasoning very succinctly. Saying that I dont see what chassidish has to do, if a beach has pritzus you dont take kids. Full stop.
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amother
Coffee


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:54 am
crust wrote:
No. They would be upset at me.

To be honest I feel that the state of the beaches has gone downhill in the last 20 years. There was always pritzus but the current code of dress was not accepted back then.

I would go to a quiet beach. A person here or there not within immediate view wouldn't be an issue. (haha, that's what I think but I never tried with my boys...)

Amother jetblack there are people that are more perceptive and/or sensitive.


What’s different now?
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Mon, Aug 10 2020, 9:55 am
FranticFrummie wrote:
That's why OP specifically asked for Chassidish input. It's an entirely different world.

I'm not judging you at all, I'm a BT who spent every weekend of my teens on the beach in Santa Cruz (mostly smoking weed!) Hypnotized

Just saying that Chassidish/Charedi people, especially FFB, come from a very different point of view.

I agree, I wasn’t going to chime in but I saw someone else non-Chassidish (RWMO) chimed in so I did too. Sorry, I probably should have kept off the thread.
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