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Forum
-> Working Women
dancingqueen
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 Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:28 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | | Nope, dont have whatsapp or facebook. I just moved to this neighborhood after I got married. I think its early to post because Im not due till after xmas. Im just thinking ahead to see what most people do |
I’ve gotten babysitter recs from fb and whatsapp. You don’t even have to post always, people post that their babysitter is leaving etc.
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amother
Pink
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:29 pm
Call your mother, mother in law, and any old enough single girl relatives and friends and check your options. Pump as much as possible and freeze and store in frig and freezer. There are storage packs and pumps made for this. And yes then nurse when you get home.
This is your first?
hugs and hatzlocha
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amother
OP
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:44 pm
| amother [ Beige ] wrote: | | Relax ...please don't stress out so many months In advance. |
not nice! trying not to. I dont have time during the school year to research all of this so summer time it is.
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amother
OP
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:45 pm
| amother [ Pink ] wrote: | Call your mother, mother in law, and any old enough single girl relatives and friends and check your options. Pump as much as possible and freeze and store in frig and freezer. There are storage packs and pumps made for this. And yes then nurse when you get home.
This is your first?
hugs and hatzlocha |
Mother and MIL are not an option. My mother works and my MIL lives in a different country.
Yes this is my first. I guess Ill just ask around my neighbors too and see what they do
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FranticFrummie
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:45 pm
Babysitter (teenager) or nanny (responsible adult) = one person per family.
10 babies all together = illegal, unlicensed day care.
Do you really want to take the risk?
Please hire a nanny who can take care of the baby in your home. If nothing else, your child won't be at risk for catching germs from all the other children. A nanny can do light house keeping and organizing while the baby is sleeping.
If your salary won't cover a person who you trust, who will treasure your child like their own, and is loyal to your family - then you really need to rethink whether it's worth it to go back to work.
BTW, my daughter's pediatrician said that no one should ever put a baby in a group setting until after they are 3 months old, and have had their first full set of immunizations. If you are anti-vax, then I guess that advice doesn't apply.
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amother
OP
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:47 pm
| FranticFrummie wrote: | Babysitter (teenager) or nanny (responsible adult) = one person per family.
10 babies all together = illegal, unlicensed day care.
Do you really want to take the risk?
Please hire a nanny who can take care of the baby in your home. If nothing else, your child won't be at risk for catching germs from all the other children. A nanny can do light house keeping and organizing while the baby is sleeping.
If your salary won't cover a person who you trust, who will treasure your child like their own, and is loyal to your family - then you really need to rethink whether it's worth it to go back to work.
BTW, my daughter's pediatrician said that no one should ever put a baby in a group setting until after they are 3 months old, and have had their first full set of immunizations. If you are anti-vax, then I guess that advice doesn't apply. |
Not going back to work is not an option for our situation.
Why do so many posters assume that mothers can quit their jobs so easily?
I was told that babysitters in my area have 4/5 babies at once, 10 is a lot!
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FranticFrummie
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 3:51 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | Not going back to work is not an option for our situation.
Why do so many posters assume that mothers can quit their jobs so easily?
I was told that babysitters in my area have 4/5 babies at once, 10 is a lot! |
What I said, was if you can't afford quality baby care on your salary, then you might as well not work, because all of your salary will be going to pay someone else to raise your helpless newborn. You'll end up with no money at the end of the week, and your child will be taken care of by a stranger who is probably overworked and watching a bunch of other kids as well.
But hey, priorities.
If you are earning enough to pay someone a decent salary, then by all means carry on.
You do you.
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amother
Tangerine
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 4:18 pm
| FranticFrummie wrote: | Babysitter (teenager) or nanny (responsible adult) = one person per family.
10 babies all together = illegal, unlicensed day care.
Do you really want to take the risk?
Please hire a nanny who can take care of the baby in your home. If nothing else, your child won't be at risk for catching germs from all the other children. A nanny can do light house keeping and organizing while the baby is sleeping.
If your salary won't cover a person who you trust, who will treasure your child like their own, and is loyal to your family - then you really need to rethink whether it's worth it to go back to work.
BTW, my daughter's pediatrician said that no one should ever put a baby in a group setting until after they are 3 months old, and have had their first full set of immunizations. If you are anti-vax, then I guess that advice doesn't apply. |
I wish I could afford a nanny or to quit my job.
Of my salary, half goes to rent and the rest to childcare. If I quit my job, where would the rent money come from?
I send my newborns to small groups- 4-5 kids or 6-7 with a second adult for the first year.
Once they’re a bit older I move them to larger more structured groups.
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amother
Tangerine
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 4:22 pm
| FranticFrummie wrote: | What I said, was if you can't afford quality baby care on your salary, then you might as well not work, because all of your salary will be going to pay someone else to raise your helpless newborn. You'll end up with no money at the end of the week, and your child will be taken care of by a stranger who is probably overworked and watching a bunch of other kids as well.
But hey, priorities.
If you are earning enough to pay someone a decent salary, then by all means carry on.
You do you. |
Not everyone is making $5 an hour that is going straight to the babysitter. Some of us have firm middle class jobs that can afford $8/hour small group babysitting But not $18/hour nanny (true prices in my neighborhood). I bring home about $16-20/hour, making small group very affordable and nanny very not.
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happy chick
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Sun, Aug 16 2020, 4:31 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | | not nice! trying not to. I dont have time during the school year to research all of this so summer time it is. |
Now is the time to look and book. Babysitters who watch children of teachers, work starting Sept. If you need someone to hold a slot for you, you need to do it early.
If you're sending to a group, 5-6 kids should be max and you need to ask for references. You have to do your job and Hashem has to do His. There have been crazy stories of what nannies have done to children r"l even in the child's home and when it was only one child.
Hashem has to watch over all His children wherever they may be.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:07 pm
Im so upset. I went into a gan today to provide services and as I was looking around I was just so upset because I cant imagine sending my 6 week old baby to a babysitter 
Baby isnt even born yet and im already stressing about it! Then I started thinking to find maybe a frum babysitter who would come to my home to watch my baby and maybe another person's baby. Where would I begin to search for something like this?
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amother
Wine
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:31 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | Im so upset. I went into a gan today to provide services and as I was looking around I was just so upset because I cant imagine sending my 6 week old baby to a babysitter
Baby isnt even born yet and im already stressing about it! Then I started thinking to find maybe a frum babysitter who would come to my home to watch my baby and maybe another person's baby. Where would I begin to search for something like this? |
Same.
Whatsapp groups, Facebook
There were a few imas From CH who offered to help you, message them
ETA: oh you said u didn’t live in ch, open a new thread for Whatsapp group in your neighborhood
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challahchallah
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:33 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | Im so upset. I went into a gan today to provide services and as I was looking around I was just so upset because I cant imagine sending my 6 week old baby to a babysitter
Baby isnt even born yet and im already stressing about it! Then I started thinking to find maybe a frum babysitter who would come to my home to watch my baby and maybe another person's baby. Where would I begin to search for something like this? |
6-8 weeks is a very short maternity leave. Is there any way you could afford to take longer? I think you said you’re in NY, the state requires most employers to give you much longer off (and gives you some pay to help make it possible). If there’s no way you can swing it, can your husband take his paternity leave after your leave ends so the baby is home with a parent a little longer? Good luck, this is such a hard situation.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:36 pm
| amother [ Wine ] wrote: | Same.
Whatsapp groups, Facebook
There were a few imas From CH who offered to help you, message them
ETA: oh you said u didn’t live in ch, open a new thread for Whatsapp group in your neighborhood |
I messaged all of them. Was not too helpful bc of the timing
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amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:39 pm
| challahchallah wrote: | | 6-8 weeks is a very short maternity leave. Is there any way you could afford to take longer? I think you said you’re in NY, the state requires most employers to give you much longer off (and gives you some pay to help make it possible). If there’s no way you can swing it, can your husband take his paternity leave after your leave ends so the baby is home with a parent a little longer? Good luck, this is such a hard situation. |
Unfortunately with my license it's not possible. I don't think I get paid for maternity leave either... My husband does not get paternity leave, they said he could have a week off after the baby is born without pay. Things will work out iyH. Its just until the end of the school so a few months, about 3 months in total. Its still difficult though.
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amother
Fuchsia
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:50 pm
What I have done, was watch a few other kids at home with my baby. I got to stay home with baby and make a little money.
With another baby I wanted to go back into my actual job, so I knew someone who was due right around the same time as I was. When I went back to work she watched my baby and her baby together. First in the building I work in and after a few months in her home. It worked out perfectly and she ended up watching this child for the next 2 years. Instead of looking for daycares see if a local mom is due around the same time and would be interested in this.
Those are 2 good options you can consider.
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happy chick
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:52 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | Im so upset. I went into a gan today to provide services and as I was looking around I was just so upset because I cant imagine sending my 6 week old baby to a babysitter
Baby isnt even born yet and im already stressing about it! Then I started thinking to find maybe a frum babysitter who would come to my home to watch my baby and maybe another person's baby. Where would I begin to search for something like this? |
When you find someone you trust, you will be ok. It will be hard, it's not easy leaving a brand new baby. I've done it many times over, bh. But you need to trust someone and all will work out , iyh. You have enough time to find someone trust-worthy.
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amother
Honeydew
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 8:56 pm
I live in CH, I've sent my babies to the most wonderful, loving home babysitters with a 1:3-4 ratio from 6 weeks old. Maybe ask on the CH babysitting group if anyone can babysit your baby and drop him off at the babysitter in the morning. I'm sure it's possible to find.
Please don't listen to everyone yelling about 1:10 ratios. There are plenty incredible and loving babysitters who genuinely take care of your child. With my first, my son's babysitter is the reason I made it through his first year. She gave me so much valuable advice, coached me through so different things and she had a knack for knowing when I should take him to the doctor and when I should wait it out. Please calm down, you will find the right one
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amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 11:34 pm
| amother [ Fuchsia ] wrote: | What I have done, was watch a few other kids at home with my baby. I got to stay home with baby and make a little money.
With another baby I wanted to go back into my actual job, so I knew someone who was due right around the same time as I was. When I went back to work she watched my baby and her baby together. First in the building I work in and after a few months in her home. It worked out perfectly and she ended up watching this child for the next 2 years. Instead of looking for daycares see if a local mom is due around the same time and would be interested in this.
Those are 2 good options you can consider. |
Nice in theory but why would a new mommy who is staying home with her own baby want to watch my baby?
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amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 17 2020, 11:36 pm
| amother [ Honeydew ] wrote: | I live in CH, I've sent my babies to the most wonderful, loving home babysitters with a 1:3-4 ratio from 6 weeks old. Maybe ask on the CH babysitting group if anyone can babysit your baby and drop him off at the babysitter in the morning. I'm sure it's possible to find.
Please don't listen to everyone yelling about 1:10 ratios. There are plenty incredible and loving babysitters who genuinely take care of your child. With my first, my son's babysitter is the reason I made it through his first year. She gave me so much valuable advice, coached me through so different things and she had a knack for knowing when I should take him to the doctor and when I should wait it out. Please calm down, you will find the right one |
Thanks for the advice 
Still not sure if ill bring baby with me to CH for my morning commute or if its best to leave baby in my home town but I doubt I will find a babysitter at 7:45 AM. At least if baby travels with me to CH we'll arrive by 9 which is a normal time for babysitter to start. Still rather find someone to come to my home though :/
If you have any names of old babysitters that watch newborns could I pm you?
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