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Making aliyah question



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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 7:58 am
We've been discussing this for awhile. I'd love to hear some perspective from people who've taken the leap. If you don't mind answering the following questions:


1. How old were your kids when you made aliyah?

2. What was your financial situation?

3. What's been the hardest part of the process?

4. Do you or anyone you know regret making aliyah to the extent that they would come back?

5. How's your hebrew?

Thank you!
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 8:13 am
1. My 4 kids were between 2 and 9.
2. We were OK but getting tuition assistance. Not poor but not extravagant. Finances were not a reason we made aliya.
3. B"H our experience was amazing. The only problem is when I talk to teachers or principals about important issues. I speak Hebrew pretty well but I cannot speak nearly as nuanced as in English and it is very hard. I see the people looking over my shoulder eager to move on to another issue, the next parent... This gets me very angry and embarrassed. Many busy people with little to no English have no patience to be in a real, important conversation with me. That goes for the gas, electric, water, car people too.
4. There are always people going back for many reasons. Finances, family outside of Israel, kids not adjusting ...
5. Pretty good. I can speak to neighbors well. Especially if the neighbors can speak some English. We love our Israeli neighbors that seem to delight in speaking with us. I have such respect for my youngests' Israeli friends that come over, knowing that they have to engage in small talk with me for a few minutes and don't seem frightened off by the prospect.

Good luck.
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 8:45 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We've been discussing this for awhile. I'd love to hear some perspective from people who've taken the leap. If you don't mind answering the following questions:


1. How old were your kids when you made aliyah?

2. What was your financial situation?

3. What's been the hardest part of the process?

4. Do you or anyone you know regret making aliyah to the extent that they would come back?

5. How's your hebrew?

Thank you!



1. Elementary through high school
2. Good enough to buy a house outright and stay afloat
3. Helping kids adjust to a different school culture
4. No
5. Quite good (every once in a while I encounter a new word in the newspaper and have to ask my kids what it means)

Answers to questions you didn't ask:
1.Modern Orthodox, dati leumi
2. Had family and friends in Israel
3. Folks back in the States were supportive
4. We didn't go back during the school year, but did go back in the summers for the first few years
5. Ten years later, kids are wonderfully adjusted, religious, integrated (to different degrees, but all integrated into Israeli life).
6. Would do it again in a heartbeat
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DrMom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 9:00 am
1. I made aliyah when I was still single
2. I was a student/post-doc
3. Finding a community
4. I know a couple of families who went back
5. Fair
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 9:05 am
I made aliyah single as well but I married someone who made aliyah with kids (and then his wife died a few years later).
The kids were ages 2-8 when they made aliyah. They are all fluent in Hebrew now - have done Sherut Leumi and army, completely integrated.
Neither DH nor myself would ever move back.
(When his wife died, everyone asked him if he would move back. He said of course not)
I don't think I know any families who have moved back although my neighbor has a SIL and some friends who did but I don't know the family circumstances.
My Hebrew is really good, DH not as much. We either get our kids to help us Smile or ask our Israeli friends and neighbors.

Hardest part is being far from family and sometimes the bureaucracy, but that gets better every year. It took me a while to get used to the medical system and now I love it and know how to get everything done that I need.
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rivkam




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 9:46 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We've been discussing this for awhile. I'd love to hear some perspective from people who've taken the leap. If you don't mind answering the following questions:


1. How old were your kids when you made aliyah?

2. What was your financial situation?

3. What's been the hardest part of the process?

4. Do you or anyone you know regret making aliyah to the extent that they would come back?

5. How's your hebrew?

Thank you!


1. I was single

2. I had a little bit of savings and some support from my parents but basically I had to make it alone. I took minimum wage jobs at the beginning in order to pay my bills and eventually found a better job and studied for a degree

3. The hardest part has changed over the years! At the beginning financies were a massive struggle and the Hebrew. Nowadays my struggles are navigating the israeli school system and not having friends who live nearby

4. I have a number of friends who moved back but all of them were young and single. Some due to financies, some due to getting married and for some it was the culture. This has been a really hard part of making aliyah that so many of my friends moved back

5. Fluent but it took a long time to get there!
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Rappel




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 10:06 am
1. Single
2. Broke. I worked like a dog and then some to make it.
3. Being so far from family. My nephews and nieces are growing, and I'm missing every birthday, every simcha, every coffee date or fun day out or babysitting opportunity. That really hurts. Yet I've asked many older families if it's worth it to raise your kids here even if no one else makes Aliyah - and the answer is always yes. Generally, the answer is that they see such a difference in how their kids came out, versus their relatives in chutz laaretz, that they don't regret it at all.

On a smaller scale: I miss the tree-covered Adirondacks sometimes, or the wooden houses of New England, but I decided years ago that if the land is not my perfect vision yet, then that just means that I have to put in the work to make it so. So I work toward creating what I think is still lacking.
4. Never. This is my home, my future, and my spiritual palace. There's no comparison - you can find better gashmiyut in other places, but Israel has unparalleled, tangible ruchniyut. To leave would be to walk into darkness.
5. I came with a Bais Yaakov girl's ability to read Chumash and Rashi. Today, I'm fluent in written and spoken Hebrew and culture. It took some effort, but G-d made us to learn. Smile
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 10:18 am
I often hear about the Israeli "bureaucracy". What is this all about plz?
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 10:33 am
Rappel wrote:
Yet I've asked many older families if it's worth it to raise your kids here even if no one else makes Aliyah - and the answer is always yes. Generally, the answer is that they see such a difference in how their kids came out, versus their relatives in chutz laaretz, that they don't regret it at all.


This is so so true. I know many families who made aliyah in the 80s with small children. They all have told me that is was so hard but so worth it. Their children are all grown now with children of their own and everyone lives in Israel and now the parents get to see all the grandchildren growing up together. You have to sacrifice for the 1st generation but they all say it's worth it.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 10:36 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We've been discussing this for awhile. I'd love to hear some perspective from people who've taken the leap. If you don't mind answering the following questions:


1. How old were your kids when you made aliyah?

2. What was your financial situation?

3. What's been the hardest part of the process?

4. Do you or anyone you know regret making aliyah to the extent that they would come back?

5. How's your hebrew?

Thank you!


1. My kids weren't born yet and I was single.
2. Penniless
3. Learning how to be assertive
4. I don't regret it. Most of my social network isn't immigrants, so I only know a few, but only one couple I knew personally moved back and it was to spend final years with their sick parents, so not exactly regret.
5. Excellent but with an accent.
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banana123




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 10:59 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We've been discussing this for awhile. I'd love to hear some perspective from people who've taken the leap. If you don't mind answering the following questions:


1. How old were your kids when you made aliyah?

2. What was your financial situation?

3. What's been the hardest part of the process?

4. Do you or anyone you know regret making aliyah to the extent that they would come back?

5. How's your hebrew?

Thank you!

1. Nonexistent; I was still single.
2. Not great but I was frugal and managed.
3. Raising kids without the extended family support network that it seems everyone else has.
4. I know some people online who regretted it and moved back, does that count?
5. Fluent/ near native. People ask me where my English is from.
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amother
Aubergine


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 11:52 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We've been discussing this for awhile. I'd love to hear some perspective from people who've taken the leap. If you don't mind answering the following questions:


1. How old were your kids when you made aliyah?

2. What was your financial situation?

3. What's been the hardest part of the process?

4. Do you or anyone you know regret making aliyah to the extent that they would come back?

5. How's your hebrew?

Thank you!



1. I was single, no kids.

2. Made Aliyah with the equivalent of 8000 USD, that was all my savings at the time (I'm not from the US). During my first year I lived in a merkaz klita and made do with that and the money from the sal klita. After that, I started working and got married almost simultaneously.

3. Getting my license recognized and starting to work in my field before totally running out of money - but it did work out well within a bit over a year. Hebrew was also tough at first (see point 5).

4. No regrets and I can't imagine going back. Someone recently asked me if I could think of anything that would make me go back - I said, a nuclear war (c"v) maybe. Okay, I do miss my family members in the old country, but I've built my life here, got married, have kids, b"H. I live in a place with hardly any Olim, so I don't know any families that went back to their former country. There were 1 or 2 single people in my merkaz klita in the beginning who went back.

5. I get around and can work in my profession. Came with rudimentary Hebrew. Ulpan and everyday life worked wonders for me. But I still can't cope with the small print in bank and insurance papers and if schools or ganim send lots of paperwork, my eyes glaze over as well. I keep telling myself I should read Hebrew books to work on my reading skills. Maybe one day I'll do it...
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Rappel




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 12:13 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I often hear about the Israeli "bureaucracy". What is this all about plz?


It's a different culture of how to get things done. The mindset here is Middle Eastern, and it's a shock for westerners to deal with it initially.

If I were going to say it in one sentence: your social mannerisms matter far more than any rule or regulation. Gain the favour of the person you're dealing with, and everything goes smoothly. Irritate or confuse them, and nothing will ever move forward.

This puts olim at a distinct disadvantage at first, since our inferior language and culture make us seem stilted and cold. The solutions: pull the shy-but-pleasant oleh chadash card whenever you have to deal with authority. Alternatively, get adopted by a more experienced Israeli whom will accompany you whenever you need to deal with a government office/banks/sundry paperwork. The latter is the better option, because you can study your companion and learn the right way to go about things.
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amother
Magenta


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 12:17 pm
Rappel wrote:
It's a different culture of how to get things done. The mindset here is Middle Eastern, and it's a shock for westerners to deal with it initially.

If I were going to say it in one sentence: your social mannerisms matter far more than any rule or regulation. Gain the favour of the person you're dealing with, and everything goes smoothly. Irritate or confuse them, and nothing will ever move forward.

This puts olim at a distinct disadvantage at first, since our inferior language and culture make us seem stilted and cold. The solutions: pull the shy-but-pleasant oleh chadash card whenever you have to deal with authority. Alternatively, get adopted by a more experienced Israeli whom will accompany you whenever you need to deal with a government office/banks/sundry paperwork. The latter is the better option, because you can study your companion and learn the right way to go about things.


That doesn't sound too different than dealing with people over here.
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amother
Green


 

Post Tue, Aug 25 2020, 1:01 pm
1. I was single.
2. Around $40,000 in savings
3. Miss my family. I have no siblings or parents here. Every chol hamoed and vacation I feel sad that I can't spend it with family like all the Israelis. Wish I could just go to my parents for Shabbos Crying
4. I feel like an alien in America. I do not know how to be an adult there. At this point staying here is 1000 times easier and more comfortable than leaving. I can think of 2 families I know that went back.
5. Fluent with a slight accent. Israelis can tell I'm American but Americans think I'm Israeli LOL
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