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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 7:49 pm
How terrible it was to listen to my sick (no not corona) family member complaining in the weak barely heard voice about being alone most of the time beside for a measly 6 hours when visits are allowed.
Are the nurses even feeding the patients that can’t eat on their own??? Do they get a drink only when a nurse remembers to ask if the want one?!
They no longer allow the iPad either.
I know we are “lucky” bec a few months ago there was zero visitation but that doesn’t help the poor patient suffering now
When will this end??????????
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yksraya




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 8:40 pm
That's tough. Really really tough.

Glad you know your lucky. We could not visit, not even in the last days. They didn't let us in. My brother was there at the enterance door crying they should let him in. They refused. We tried with lawyers, as we had a letter from doh they should let us in, but they sent us to their lawyer, meanwhile relative passed away...

Bh at least we had zoom, and they also put a phone on speaker next to relative.
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NotInNJMommy




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 8:46 pm
It's really hard. My friend's mother was hospitalized twice these months, not with COVID, but it was also very difficult. Once she was admitted, no one could go in with her, and yes, only visitation hours 4 hours a day and only 1 person per day. It was hard to get answers because no one was there with her when the doctors did their rounds, and the discharges were also difficult because no one was with her when she'd be given her discharge directives..they'd have to figure it out after they'd picked her up and read through papers that gave incomplete or conflicting information.
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small bean




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:16 pm
My sister is working on changing this in NJ after our experience. There is neglect because every patient in a hospital needs an advocate. Nurses can't replace someone sitting at a bedside.

Share your story at yes2familymembers@gmail.com
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cbsp




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:23 pm
Oy oy oy. Hug

Why do they no longer allow the iPad? Someone else just told me that about their inpatient relative (also not covid) and couldn't explain the reasoning...

A few people have managed to get themselves hired as official aides so they can work in the facility. Is that doable in your case?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:56 pm
ipad isn’t allowed anymore because they don’t want ppl watching the nurses.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:58 pm
yksraya wrote:
That's tough. Really really tough.

Glad you know your lucky. We could not visit, not even in the last days. They didn't let us in. My brother was there at the enterance door crying they should let him in. They refused. We tried with lawyers, as we had a letter from doh they should let us in, but they sent us to their lawyer, meanwhile relative passed away...

Bh at least we had zoom, and they also put a phone on speaker next to relative.


I’m sorry for your loss.

Small comfort for a current patient. And especially one who cannot help themselves at all
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cbsp




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 11:01 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
ipad isn’t allowed anymore because they don’t want ppl watching the nurses.


I'm astounded that that's the officially stated reason.

(I figured it was the real reason but thought that they'd at least have a pretending-to-be-plausible explanation other than the truth)
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 11:14 pm
I don’t know that’s the official reason. We were just told no. And then they shut it off
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Mama Bear




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 11:37 pm
Get WellTab to talk to the hospital. Theyve dealt with this before.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Oct 18 2020, 11:51 pm
Mama Bear wrote:
Get WellTab to talk to the hospital. Theyve dealt with this before.


It’s x being allowed at all. They used to allow it but no more
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Mommyg8




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 12:11 am
I know this sounds horrible, but you have to assume the patient is not being fed. Is there any way you can hire/pay someone to feed the patient?
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Goldie613




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 12:25 am
Re the iPad - do they allow cellphones? Many have ways to video chat over the phone (watts app comes to mind but I'm sure there are others). If your relative is careful not to use the video options around the staff you may be able to sneak in video visits that way.

The main issue here is usually quoted as patient privacy concerns, as whomever your family member is rooming with hasn't agreed to have you video whatever is happening with their care. If your hospital has an option to pay more for a private room, that MIGHT give you a bit more wiggle room.

Another possibility - again, depending on what your hospital allows - you may be able to pay for an outside nurse to stay with her part of the time. They're not family, so that might give you a loophole to make sure she's being cared for.

Check also if clergy visits have the same restrictions. Even if they won't allow outside Rabbis in, they may allow the hospital clergy (of whatever faith) to visit her daily. At least this way she'll have a bit more company and you'll know she's being checked on.

Can she feed herself? If so, the hospital may allow you to drop off care packages for the staff to give to her, so at least you don't have to worry about her eating.

Hug
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yksraya




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 12:45 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
ipad isn’t allowed anymore because they don’t want ppl watching the nurses.
iPad was only a thing in very few hospitals. By us there wasn't any. The kind nurses allowed us zoom through their phone, but that happened only 2-3 times for a short period.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 7:08 am
Mama Bear wrote:
Get WellTab to talk to the hospital. Theyve dealt with this before.


They obviously know hospital doesn’t let bec they said they can’t. They say it’s up to nurse
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 7:14 am
This is a private room. Patient is to weak to make calls.


This isn’t about this patient. This is terrible for all patients. Corona repercussions are not only about school children. This is another huge terrifying issue. Who knows if they will ever allow normal visitation. Why would they. It’s better for them this way.
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amother




Copper
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 7:18 am
When DH had Covid19, he was weak to call in the beginning but after he called from his phone(private room, no visitors, beginning of the pandemic).
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Bluepink




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 8:28 am
As an RN in a hospital that used to allow tablets but no longer does, I’m sorry and I’m with you all the way. During our unit meeting discussing the policy change, I tried to argue on behalf of patients and families, but no one else agreed. The reason they don’t allow them is not only because the nurses are being watched, but because they can be videotaped or recorded somehow. I really don’t see that logic at all, because we always used to allow family 24/7, where they would watch us ( and often secretly record us). I don’t see the difference between remote monitoring vs them being at the bedside.
I also saw the amazing impact of a tablet with 2 way video on my family members recovery back in June. He would have been delirious and aggressive without the ability to see us. We were able to talk to him and reorient him any time of day.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 8:43 am
Bluepink wrote:
As an RN in a hospital that used to allow tablets but no longer does, I’m sorry and I’m with you all the way. During our unit meeting discussing the policy change, I tried to argue on behalf of patients and families, but no one else agreed. The reason they don’t allow them is not only because the nurses are being watched, but because they can be videotaped or recorded somehow. I really don’t see that logic at all, because we always used to allow family 24/7, where they would watch us ( and often secretly record us). I don’t see the difference between remote monitoring vs them being at the bedside.
I also saw the amazing impact of a tablet with 2 way video on my family members recovery back in June. He would have been delirious and aggressive without the ability to see us. We were able to talk to him and reorient him any time of day.


Thank you.
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amother




Copper
 

Post  Mon, Oct 19 2020, 8:47 am
Bluepink wrote:
As an RN in a hospital that used to allow tablets but no longer does, I’m sorry and I’m with you all the way. During our unit meeting discussing the policy change, I tried to argue on behalf of patients and families, but no one else agreed. The reason they don’t allow them is not only because the nurses are being watched, but because they can be videotaped or recorded somehow. I really don’t see that logic at all, because we always used to allow family 24/7, where they would watch us ( and often secretly record us). I don’t see the difference between remote monitoring vs them being at the bedside.
I also saw the amazing impact of a tablet with 2 way video on my family members recovery back in June. He would have been delirious and aggressive without the ability to see us. We were able to talk to him and reorient him any time of day.

Thank you for advocating for the patients!
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