Anxiety in a 15 year old

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Forum -> Children's Health

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amother

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 8:13 pm

My 15 year old daughter has a more anxious personality. For ex: worrying about friends, house has to be perfect, she needs all the right stuff. To a point a little more than regular. Beginning of each school year and camp season she is miserable that she has no friends. Cries a lot. Like she has who to hang out with but she feels excluded. She has real medical anxiety, for years. We tried cbt a few years ago but she did not like the therapist. She just asked me if tylenol or motrin helps for anxiety because all day she has to "make herself breathe ". So I suggested therapy. She refuses. So I suggested getting her some books to read and she was okay with that. She is willing to try new things so it's not like this holds her back. But she needs to be more chilled. And also she recognizes that sometimes she has to make herself breathe. Like an uncomfortable feeling. Any suggestions for books for her to read? Or any other ideas.

amother

White

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 8:18 pm

I would strongly suspect pandas, pans, neurolyme or some other form of encephalopathy. The forcing herself to breathe may in fact be air hunger, a very common symptom of babesia, a lyme coinfections. Cbd may take the edge off her symptoms until you are able to get to a specialist to sort this out.

amother

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 8:22 pm

I doubt this is pandas or lyme. Pandas not usual to start in 15 year old. And she has this personality. So not sudden onset. And needing to breathe like that is a symptom of anxiety.

amother

White

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 9:00 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I doubt this is pandas or lyme. Pandas not usual to start in 15 year old. And she has this personality. So not sudden onset. And needing to breathe like that is a symptom of anxiety.

pandas isn’t always sudden onset. Or sometimes the onset is so early on in life it’s missed. Even if she was always this way, there’s a biological reason for it. And yes, the breathing thing could be caused by anxiety, but it could also be it’s own symptom. I would definitely want to rule this in or out with a competent, literate provider

ImmaBubby

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 9:43 pm

I’d make an appointment with a therapist who specializes in anxiety in teens. She might send youvto the pediatrician for some tests to rule things out, but you’ll know you’ve covered your bases.

amother

cornflower

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 9:48 pm

I was like this as a teen then finally decided I didn't want to be anymore and literally I'm the most chilled, not anxious person. I think I was modeling behavior I saw in my parents so I'd recommend you seeing if you could be anxious or modeling that to her. I don't think she needs to go to therapy if she doesn't want to. Could you get her involved in some sports?

amother

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 9:50 pm

Thank you for taking time to respond. She refuses to go to a therapist. I work in a related field and this is not uncommon at this age. She is too socially self conscious. So I am looking for some "self help" books for her to help her understand anxiety and for her to learn how to help herself. Her anxiety is not constant and she lives life fully. No one would think she has any anxiety.
Another school of thought is for people to learn to embrace anxiety, or other negative and uncomfortable feelings, as opposed to learning to get rid of them, because by trying hard to rid ourselves of negative feelings, we validate that they should not be present. As opposed to normalizing these feelings and accepting that they will pass which in theory should actually keep people calmer since it's not such a big deal that has to be eradicated. I am not so familiar with that. It's a new concept I have heard.

amother

cornflower

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 9:52 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Definitely do not know about any self help books, but I wanted to tell you that I think this is a great idea.

leahleah

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:07 pm

Easy read book.
Taming the Anxious Mind by Heidi Schrieber
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1732.....H3JB2

Good luck!!!

amother

Taupe

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:21 pm

Exquisite mind by terry rubenstein or ride the wave by Aviva Barnett

amother

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 10:24 pm

Thanks to all of you for taking the time to respond and help me. Will begin with these suggestions. Tizku l'mitzvos.

amother

Aquamarine

Sun, Oct 18 2020, 11:52 pm

If she’s asking for Tylenol or Motrin please consider anti anxiety meds. Will change her life.

amother

White

Mon, Oct 19 2020, 5:50 pm

amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:

If she’s asking for Tylenol or Motrin please consider anti anxiety meds. Will change her life.

motrin might actually work if it’s being caused by inflammation

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