Locking a Thread | Imamother

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 10:37 am

I understand a thread being locked if the discussion is against halacha, or if people are attacking, insulting or being otherwise disrespectful.

Some threads get locked just because an opposing view is being presented. That's censorship, which is not a valid reason to lock a thread.

I'm specifically referring to the thread about whether people are getting the flu. I thought everyone was quite respectful, yet the thread got locked.

Anyone agree with me? Did I misunderstand, or was the thread locked because op didn't want to hear another side?

I'm not attacking you op, I'm trying to understand how this forum runs and I believe it promotes debate and healthy discussion.

watergirl

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 10:48 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I locked it and I left a note as to why. The OP asked us to lock it. Check the thread and you will see my post. It is not censorship. It is me, respecting the OP who was hurt (as she said in the thread) and asked that it not continue in her report of the post. Wouldn't you want me to do the same for you if you asked to lock a thread you started?

amother

Black

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 10:50 am

I agree with you. If an OP posts something personal and requests her thread to be locked, I say respect her choice to not further dissect her life. When people post SB issues with DH and then get the info they need or on the contrary their DH gets bashed and they don't want to hear more negative things about him, I get it.

But the flu thread was no longer ABOUT the OP and was a general discussion about how to behave when one's child isn't feeling well. Why does the OP get to dictate a shutting down of such a discussion? The topic wasn't anymore about her. She could simply stop participating in her own thread and allow for continued debate.

FranticFrummie

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 10:55 am

If the topic shares no personal information - and is no longer about OP - but is STILL relevant to other posters, there is a simple solution.

OP can simply unclick the box at the bottom of the post, that says "Follow topic for replies". Once she does that, she will no longer get notifications about new posts on that thread, and she can ignore the conversation.

If other people want to continue arguing, debating, or whatever, that is no longer any of her concern.

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 10:55 am

watergirl wrote:

I did not see any explanation, just that the op requested it be locked. To me it seems she wanted it locked because people disagreed with her approach. If they were disrespectful in any way, I understand, but if they were presenting another side, that would not be a valid reason to lock a thread.

black wrote:

But the flu thread was no longer ABOUT the OP and was a general discussion about how to behave when one's child isn't feeling well. Why does the OP get to dictate a shutting down of such a discussion?

I actually think it was about her. People were suggesting what she should do if her child is ill. She didn't like what they were saying, and got to promote her agenda by locking the thread.

That's what is seemed to me. If there's another explanation, my ears are open.

tweety1

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:02 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Let's say you're right, let's just say, so what? She's the op and she has the right to have her thread locked. Simple as that.
To add: I think you're wrong. She wasn't promoting her agenda in any way. Maybe she didn't like some responses, and so?! She's still has a right to have her thread locked.
You can always start a spin-off.

Last edited by tweety1 on Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:05 am; edited 1 time in total

watergirl

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:11 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I gave an explanation. I said

watergirl wrote:

Locked at OP's request.

That is the only explanation needed. I am sorry you don't like it. The things she says to the mods are between her and the mod and not everyone needs to know the whole thing. I can understand why it is annoying, but it's ok. Let's get some perspective here please. Is it such a big deal that a thread ended? If you really wanted to continue the discussion, why cant you just open a new thread as a spin off and discuss without bringing in OP's situation?

amother

Black

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:13 am

tweety1 wrote:

Every op has a right to have her thread locked or removed. Is there something I'm not getting?!?

I don't think that's true or fair. Once you put something out there on a public forum, it no longer belongs to you. OPs don't get to dictate the progress of their thread; plenty threads get derailed. Posting something publicly means it turns into a public discussion which now belongs to anyone who posted on or read that thread. When people post opposing opinions, OP doesn't have any "rights" to shut down opposing thoughts. Sorry.

The only exception is when, as I mentioned previously, someone posts sensitive or personal details about themselves or their life. Then if she wants the thread locked or removed, it's a matter of respect to her to not leave these details exposed forever. Which wasn't the case with the referenced thread.

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:17 am

tweety1 wrote:

I guess your right, and that's how it works here.
However,I don't think it should be that way. Don't post if you don't want to hear a descenting opinion. Forums are for healthy discussion and should not get locked just because someone doesn't like what is being said. Unless of course it's offensive, disrespectful, or violates some other rule.

Di fier Brent oif Di ganefs het.
(transliterated since my Yiddish spelling is not so good.
Translation : the fire is burning on the thiefs hat)
Explanation: when someone does something wrong, they will feel defensive. ( BTW, this is a judgment, and should not be allowed on that thread. It assumes I can judge who is right. I'm saying it here because I am not in discussion with OP. I'm explaining that locking a thread allows people to promote an agenda.)

I rest my case.

And now that I got the last word, please lock the thread. (said sarcastically)

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:48 am

watergirl wrote:

That is the only explanation needed. I am sorry you don't like it. The things she says to the mods are between her and the mod and not everyone needs to know the whole thing. I can understand why it is annoying, but it's ok. Let's get some perspective here please. Is this such a big deal that a thread ended? If you really wanted to continue the discussion, why cant you just open a new thread as a spin off and discuss without bringing in OP's situation?

Yes, it is a big deal to me, thank you for asking the question. It is pretty fundamental to the style and purpose of the forum. That's how I see it, which is why I started this thread. Seems like others feel that way too. There's also another thread now where someone else was upset a thread was locked without explanation.
Locking a thread is not something to be taken lightly by Moderators. It affects the way imamother runs. If imamother promotes healthy conversation, then Noone should be allowed to cut anyone off unless there is a violation of a rule.

watergirl

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:52 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes, it is a big deal to me. It is pretty fundamental to the style and purpose of the forum. That's how I see it, which is why I started this thread. Seems like others feel that way too. There's also another thread now where someone else was upset a thread was locked without explanation.
Locking a thread is not something to be taken lightly by Moderators. It affects the way imamother runs.

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:58 am

[quote="watergirl"]Again, on that other thread, Yael came in and told OP there is a reason. She chooses not to make it known, for which I assume she also has a very good reason. She invited OP to pm her and OP declined. Mods do not take locking threads lightly.[/quote]
That's good to know, and I'll have to assume it's true since I will never be able to verify.
It certainly did not seem that way when you implied that it should not be a big deal to anyone.

watergirl

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 12:10 pm

[quote="amother [ OP ]"]

watergirl wrote:

Again, on that other thread, Yael came in and told OP there is a reason. She chooses not to make it known, for which I assume she also has a very good reason. She invited OP to pm her and OP declined. Mods do not take locking threads lightly.[/quote]
That's good to know, and I'll have to assume it's true since I will never be able to verify.
It certainly did not seem that way when you implied that it should not be a big deal to anyone.

My intention with that statement was in with the rest of that particular post. Read it again please.

watergirl wrote:

I asked, is it such a big deal that a thread ended (ie, locked for a good reason), and THEN I asked, if you wanted to continue the discussion, why not start a spin-off to discuss the issue at hand minus the OP's issue that started the thread. I did not imply that a thread ending should not be a big deal to anyone (see how you added words to my post there?). I do not understand why people prefer to create a new thread to complain about a thread being locked (ie, make a "big deal" about it being locked" AS OPPOSED to taking a breath and making a spin-off to continue the conversation. Or pm a mod and ask if they can do it.

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 12:18 pm

watergirl wrote:

I asked, is it such a big deal that a thread ended (ie, locked for a good reason), and THEN I asked, if you wanted to continue the discussion, why not start a spin-off to discuss the issue at hand minus the OP's issue that started the thread. I did not imply that a thread ending should not be a big deal to anyone (see how you added words to my post there?).That's good to know, and I'll have to assume it's true since I will never be able to verify.
It certainly did not seem that way when you said(ie, make a "big deal" about it being locked" AS OPPOSED to taking a breath and making a spin-off to continue the conversation. Or pm a mod and ask if they can do it.

You prefaced this question with 'lets all get some perspective.' To me that implied you disagreed with anyone who felt its a big deal.
Perhaps I misunderstood, but then you posted this. So, if you didn't imply it then, you said it just now. You don't understand why people have this preference. Have you read this thread? Some of us are trying to explain that to you. I thought I was clear, but if I come up with another way to explain it, I will post.

tweety1

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 1:08 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

You want the mods to lock a thread with an explanation that satisfies you. Mods have a right to lock a thread without an explanation in my book. That's why they're mods and you are not! If you're son unhappy with rules on this site nobody's forcing you to stay. They are the mods. They are the ones if and when and why a thread gets removed or locked. Simple as that!
Op, you're so upset that the mods didn't consult with you abt locking a thread-- thanks for the giggle LOL

amother

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 1:34 pm

tweety1 wrote:

I'm not upset. I started this thread to discuss the rules. I expressed that I feel readers and participant should get more of an explanation of why a thread got locked. I also explained why I feel this is fundamental to discussions on this site (a big deal). I was curious if others shared my opinion.

I absolutely agree, I now have a choice. My questions were answered by the mod, and I will do with them as I wish.

Glad you got the giggles, so sorry for anyone whose blood pressure was raised.