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Can anyone relate?

Forum -> Inquiries & Offers -> Moving/ Relocating

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amother

OP

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 9:27 pm

DH and I really want to move out of Brooklyn. We have a probable destination in mind and hope to move next summer.

I keep getting nervous about all the things that the new place won't have that Brooklyn does. Some are dumb, some more important.

For example, I was thinking, "What if we have a child who needs EI services? The place we're thinking of doesn't have anything like NY."

I go to Bingo and think about higher food prices.

I applied to school for my child here and thought about the higher tuition prices there. (We're applying to schools in Brooklyn and in the other place.)

I go to my family and think about how far away it is from my parents, siblings, grandparents, and in-laws.

But I know that we need to get out. We need to put down roots in a place that has more of a community for us. We need to establish our own family away from our families' influence. We believe that the new place would afford many opportunities that Brooklyn just won't. I can't help but focus on the loss of my comfort zone, though.

Can anyone relate?

6

3

amother

Babyblue

Tue, Oct 20 2020, 11:31 pm

Yup definitely relate. It's a really difficult decision.

5

asdf1

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:01 pm

Feel exactly the same way

2

pizza4

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:13 pm

Me too...

1

amother

Salmon

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:30 pm

Yup. Stuck here too.

1

IsraeliSoul

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:34 pm

If that’s what’s good for you and your family, then probably as soon as you settle down after the move, Brooklyn will already be out of your comfort zone

1

amother

Gold

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:37 pm

Op you sound like me, only I’m scared to actually decide that I’m ready to make the move!
Any hint where you’re possibly moving?

amother

OP

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:37 pm

IsraeliSoul wrote:

If that’s what’s good for you and your family, then probably as soon as you settle down after the move, Brooklyn will already be out of your comfort zone

It's really hard for me to leave family. Most of our family is here. We get a lot of family help and see them frequently. My kids love my parents, grandparents, and siblings, as well as my husband's family. It's going to be painful.

It's what's best in the long run, but I anticipate being really lonely and homesick in the short term. Additionally, I'm nervous about losing all that help.

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1

amother

Salmon

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:53 pm

I wish we could transplant some of Brooklyn out of NY.

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amother

OP

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:54 pm

amother [ Salmon ] wrote:

I wish we could transplant some of Brooklyn out of NY.

For me, it's really my family that I'd want to transplant. I'm very glad to get out of Brooklyn otherwise.

Well, that and lower tuition and food prices.

studying_torah

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 9:59 pm

are you sure making the move is necessary?
Can you just move further out in brooklyn?

1

amother

Salmon

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 10:01 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

For me, it's really my family that I'd want to transplant. I'm very glad to get out of Brooklyn otherwise.

Well, that and lower tuition and food prices.

I would transplant my kids' schools and my favorite stores.
My family doesn't live here.

1

amother

Silver

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 10:05 pm

I left brooklyn, the first place I moved to I just couldn't settle in. Once you live in brooklyn you realize how hard life is away from it. It's set up perfectly for a jewish life. I have since moved to a third place and it's more similar to brooklyn and I'm much happier here.

amother

Taupe

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 10:13 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

It's really hard for me to leave family. Most of our family is here. We get a lot of family help and see them frequently. My kids love my parents, grandparents, and siblings, as well as my husband's family. It's going to be painful.

It's what's best in the long run, but I anticipate being really lonely and homesick in the short term. Additionally, I'm nervous about losing all that help.

having a supportive family is nothing to sneeze out.
why do you say it will be best for your family in the long run?

if a person moves away from family because of a job or no choice its one thing but to move away because you feel its best to establish your "own family" away from your families influence is modern day rubbish.

your family IS your family. and trees and branches grow best if they have strong roots.(of course this is assuming the roots in your case are strong.)

if its the help youll be missing you can always hire the help you need.

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amother

Emerald

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 10:18 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

It's really hard for me to leave family. Most of our family is here. We get a lot of family help and see them frequently. My kids love my parents, grandparents, and siblings, as well as my husband's family. It's going to be painful.

It's what's best in the long run, but I anticipate being really lonely and homesick in the short term. Additionally, I'm nervous about losing all that help.

Why are you moving then?

amother

Red

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 10:39 pm

I feel the same way. I didnt have the guts to move when we got kicked out of our apt and moved to another apt in a building. but I know in my head that this is not my forever home and try to make the most of city life.

chocolatecake

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 11:35 pm

I left brooklyn after living there for 9 years and I didn’t look back once.

I moved to Long Island where everything is more expensive than Brooklyn besides the housing. I’ll give up being able to run to the corner store to buy milk for an actual detached house with yard and my very own driveway and parking in front of my house that is always available for me.

Also I am part of a community here which is super nice and I didn’t have that in brooklyn.

I had no family in Brooklyn so that was no issue for me. Most people that I know live in Brooklyn because family is there and that is very big deal and makes the decision to leave much harder!

2

amother

OP

Thu, Oct 22 2020, 12:22 pm

amother [ Salmon ] wrote:

I would transplant my kids' schools and my favorite stores.
My family doesn't live here.

My kids are in nursery/playgroup - one of the reasons we want to move, since my older one will be entering kindergarten next year.

Favorite stores is another one, you're right.

amother

OP

Thu, Oct 22 2020, 12:23 pm

LOL wrong thread

pizza4

Thu, Oct 22 2020, 9:01 pm

I don’t live in Brooklyn, but Lakewood, and my family is in both Brooklyn and Lakewood.
I have not felt comfortable where we live now all this time... and obviously several more reasons we are planning to move away. But I'm not sure I can handle being too far from family.
I'd love to transplant all my people and conveniences with me, lol.

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