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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 5:10 pm
I got accepted into my "backup plan" School and I said yes, because they're putting a ton ofpressure that they need an answer ASAP and they have a lot of applicants and I'll lose the spot.

Is it normal that you have to confirm your registration within a week?? It's only november!

If it's inappropriate for them to put that kind of pressure, then I don't feel so bad backing out. A different school is ready to to give us an interview, and I'm all conflicted as to what to do.

I'm talking about lakewood boys School
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amother




Aubergine
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 5:13 pm
Unfortunately, yes, it is the norm in places where there's a lot of competition for slots.
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square_peg




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 5:13 pm
I'm not sure if its appropriate or not, but I'd probably do what is best for my child, even if it means accepting, and then backing out when you "technically" shouldn't.
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 6:44 pm
I've accepted and given a deposit. And when we were unexpectedly accepted to the school we really wanted, gave up the first deposit and went where was best. But I knew I couldn't give up the slot we were first awarded as it was the only option at first. This was high school in Brooklyn.
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amother




Amethyst
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 6:52 pm
I would go for the interview for the school you prefer. The spot you give up will be filled so I wouldn't worry about it.
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amother




Lawngreen
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 6:53 pm
In Lakewood be careful with this. Schools do talk to each other and if another school you are pushing finds out you have a slot elsewhere it will be much much harder to be considered for a slot there. Many people only apply to one school, even a hard one and just push and push until August if they have to to avoid this exact scenario.

It is fair that they demand answers so soon because please understand space is so limited and if you tie up a slot that's another mother waiting and waiting for a call for an interview or for an acceptance that can't get one until you make a decision. Especially in Lakewood, it can't really be any other way.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:05 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote:
I've accepted and given a deposit. And when we were unexpectedly accepted to the school we really wanted, gave up the first deposit and went where was best. But I knew I couldn't give up the slot we were first awarded as it was the only option at first. This was high school in Brooklyn.


I know but I've been speaking to the menahal directly and he is basically made me promise.

And wants me to fill the tuition contract within like 2 days... And supposedly I can't back out of the tuition contract even if I don't send them him the school...

I only sent the application like two weeks ago to this school... So it rubs me the wrong way that I have to commit so quickly... Like why are they so desperate to have me?
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amother




Brown
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:12 pm
THink of all the kids who got no answer. They are pressuring you so they can move on to those kds who wre waiting. It would be incredibly insensitive of the school to make parents wait longer then necessary.
If it was you with no answer you would expect parents to get back aSAP
This is how it works in Lakewood.
Backing out is tricky. Many rabbanim will tell you it is wrong to break a contract.
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amother




Lawngreen
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:21 pm
If you have an interview available at the school you want take it. Chances are it will be scheduled within the week. Delay school one until you call pull for feedback on interview. If you get accepted immediately great. If you hear a hard no immediately chances are the first school would still take you. The part where it gets tricky is if you can't get a feel on the better school after the interview and then you need to decide whether to give up a good slot and push the better one until who knows when, or to give up on the better school.

But definitely go to that interview!
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:28 pm
amother [ Brown ] wrote:
THink of all the kids who got no answer. They are pressuring you so they can move on to those kds who wre waiting. It would be incredibly insensitive of the school to make parents wait longer then necessary.
If it was you with no answer you would expect parents to get back aSAP
This is how it works in Lakewood.
Backing out is tricky. Many rabbanim will tell you it is wrong to break a contract.


I haven't signed I contract yet. But I told him I will send my kid, because I was backed into a corner.

It's just crazy because if I get accepted into more than one school I should be able to choose, right? I shouldn't be forced to concede because one accepted me super fast, when the other one just offered an interview...
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:36 pm
amother [ Brown ] wrote:
THink of all the kids who got no answer. They are pressuring you so they can move on to those kds who wre waiting. It would be incredibly insensitive of the school to make parents wait longer then necessary.
If it was you with no answer you would expect parents to get back aSAP
This is how it works in Lakewood.
Backing out is tricky. Many rabbanim will tell you it is wrong to break a contract.


But really?? Its only november 15...
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:41 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I know but I've been speaking to the menahal directly and he is basically made me promise.

And wants me to fill the tuition contract within like 2 days... And supposedly I can't back out of the tuition contract even if I don't send them him the school...

I only sent the application like two weeks ago to this school... So it rubs me the wrong way that I have to commit so quickly... Like why are they so desperate to have me?

Push off calling back the school with an answer. Take the interview with the second school. Try to push things off a bit.
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amother




Lawngreen
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:43 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
But really?? Its only november 15...


Succos was six weeks ago. People who have not gotten an interview at any school are starting to get nervous around now.
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amother




Blush
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:49 pm
Was the school kol torah?
Sounds like it. I called at random in August and he accepted my son over the phone with no interview.

Very odd..
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:54 pm
amother [ Blush ] wrote:
Was the school kol torah?
Sounds like it. I called at random in August and he accepted my son over the phone with no interview.

Very odd..


I dont want to name names. Smile
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amother




Amethyst
 

Post  Sun, Nov 15 2020, 7:59 pm
The school shouldn't be pressuring people and if they do then people have a right to feel backed into a corner and then back out. You don't have to take a spot just because people play games like only applying to one school until they get in. If we didn't have such people we would have less problems with school acceptance. And yes I live here so I get it but I didn't play games and I only applied to schools that aren't impossible to get in.
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