How did you/your child with learning difficulties succeed?

amother

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 2:03 pm

My first grader is having an extremely rough time with school this year. She never sailed smoothly but this year its just really bad. Reading, writing, math, kriyah - she is behind with everything. We got her a learning disabled diagnosis and are working with her and the school.

I would really like to know, if you or your child had learning difficulties, did school ever get easier or more manageable? Was there a different area in life that you shined to compensate? What field did you/your child go into?

amother

Ivory

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 2:28 pm

My child who always struggled in school is still struggling very much at 12 years old.
The academic pressure is only greater the older they get.
My child is fine socially which in a way makes it harder because there’s embarrassment that school work is so hard.
Camp is a place for children to thrive when they struggle academically so for us, camp is a must no matter what our financial situation is.
It’s very, very hard to watch your child struggle and suffer.
Of course we got all the help we could possibly get including paying a fortune for private tutoring in the older grades.
It’s just that school is all about academic achievements and a child with learning disabilities will never feel that they are achieving when they are aware of their struggles.
I’m sorry, I know you probably wanted to hear that it gets easier but sadly we haven’t had that experience.

amother

Hotpink

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 4:37 pm

My child struggled a lot when he was younger. We did a lot of therapy and tutoring, tons of OT. We did a self contained class for a couple of years. Medication for adhd. Bh he is now holding his own. He still has some weaknesses but he keeps up and manages in a mainstream class without complaining of struggling. He may need help again at some point but bh right now he is doing nicely!

amother

Babyblue

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 4:57 pm

B"h YES! All you need is the best tutors, they are worth their weight in gold, it is less expensive than the special ed schools.

In our case we got dx of processing disorder at that age but it turned out later it was found to be dyslexia. Luckily, the tutors for reading taught a method used for dyslexia. And time and a half will become a big benefit in older grades.

We tutored for math throughout & reading in the younger grades.

We kept to easier lower pressure environments within the mainstream schools, not schools labeled " for dumb kids". The dx helped with boosting self esteem, blamed dyslexia not self, and so did extra cirricular activities that were a place to excel, we invested in a number over the years. The gain of skill and talent really was excellent to counterbalance academia struggles.

hihellowhatsup

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 6:49 pm

Devorah Kupperman 929-920-4246 is an awesome reading specialist. She might not have availability but she can most likely connect you with a great therapist. (she trains tutors in special education, so she has a database)

amother

Cerise

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 6:59 pm

Not a child, but had siblings and friends with learning disabilities/differences when they were in school and most of them are doing just fine (jobs, families, etc)

amother

Tan

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 7:07 pm

Heard of Devorah Kupperman too. She does a fantastic job helping children with all types of learning disabilities. But it is almost impossible to get into her. VERY LONG WAITING LIST.

amother

Blue

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 8:52 pm

Go to a nueropsychologist to get a good diagnoses. Dr. Miriam Goldstein in Brooklyn. Dr. Michael Steinhardt near Monsey. It's a fortune but you'll save money in the long run by knowing exactly what help you need. Tutoring doesn't usually solve the problem but can be helpful.

amother

Tan

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 9:12 pm

An official diagnosis is usually not helpful. What are you going to do about the diagnosis?? There's no cure for dyslexia, no meds. The only solution is a good tutor. And if you send your child to a professional tutor they can treat your child based on his/ her needs regardless of whether there is a diagnosis there. And if you send your child to a mediocre tutor, they won't know how to deal with the diagnosis. its a waste of money

amother

Brunette

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 9:30 pm

rikkik wrote:

vision therapy is great- but it isn't as effective if not done in tandem with reading intervention.

definitely not as a stand-alone intervention

amother

Linen

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 9:34 pm

I actually had a very hard time in school. Extra tutoring didn't help.
But what did help is one year I had a tutor that taught me the material before the teacher taught it...it was gold. So I had time to process it and was able to catch on when the teacher was teaching to the class. Only class I didn't fail.

amother

Natural

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 9:45 pm

We switched our son to a school with small contained classes. The school staff is trained to teach every child according to their individual needs. They get tutors and helpful advice according the child's level.
My son came in last year not reading or writing at all at age 8. His behavior was over the roof. On medication.
It took 1 year and he is a new kid bh. He reads well. Even comics books, writes pretty decent his confidence grew immensely. He is bh very well behaved. He had no inkling about respecting authority last year.
I worked with a guidance counselor as well on how to deal with his chutzpah and low frustration tolerance. Bh he came a very long way, he is now a calm relaxed happy child bh. His issues are on a much lower level bh.
We are actually considering upping him a grade in that yeshiva.

amother

Mon, Nov 16 2020, 9:54 pm

amother [ Tan ] wrote:

You need a diagnosis to get any services from the Board of Ed.

Yes a good tutor is worth their weight in gold but if you come with a diagnosis the tutor should know what methods work for that disability and can right away start working their magic instead of trial and error.

amother

Babyblue

Tue, Nov 17 2020, 4:10 pm

amother [ Tan ] wrote:

Actually not. It is very helpful. It takes the burden that they are to blame off their shoulders. Its like matir assurim. It is especially true, the smarter the child. They see how the other kids excel and beat themselves up inside because they are smart. A dyslexia dx to them is like you need glasses instead of feeling like they are inherently bad as a person.

Many evaluators try to save the parents $ and not do specific test for dyslexia ( CTOPP) on top of the cost of the rest of it if they dont see signs. Then kids miss getting the dx if they compensate so well.

amother

Ivory

Tue, Nov 17 2020, 5:57 pm

It didn’t help us one bit to have our child evaluated. Guess what they figured out? Our child has difficulty learning! Wow! I wouldn’t have known...
We have had SO many evaluations... Through the board of education, health insurance, private... everyone said the same thing... clear learning disabilities... it will be hard to learn in school. Thank you for that. We knew that already.
Tutors, tutors more tutors.... Occupational therapy, speech therapy, you name it, we did it.
And here we are in 7th grade overwhelmed with homework each night, paying a few hundred dollars a week for tutors and begging teachers for modified tests.
If your child is up to par socially and resents being different than the rest of the class, school becomes a nightmare.

amother

Papaya

Tue, Nov 17 2020, 9:04 pm

If the disability is moderate to severe maybe you would consider a special ed school. The headache of dealing with tutors and teachersand therapist will be over. They will have the skill and patience to deal with the issues and you child will feel confident that she is accepted as she is and excelling academically.