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Forum
-> Fashion and Beauty
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amother
OP
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 Tue, Nov 17 2020, 7:33 pm
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I thought it would be more fun to put it here, rather than Shulem Bayis issues. My husband has always had an opinion on what I wear. Does your husband have any input as far as your clothing goes? Does he have complaints about your sense of style? He's finally accepted that I'm a weirdo, but now that I'm getting older he says I dress too young. I'm not sure what I would wear to look more "mature". Misook? St. John. I don't get him. Send help.
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amother
Royalblue
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Tue, Nov 17 2020, 7:49 pm
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How old are you? I can link some things
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amother
OP
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Tue, Nov 17 2020, 8:33 pm
| amother [ Royalblue ] wrote: | | How old are you? I can link some things |
40. Thanks.
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amother
Maroon
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Tue, Nov 17 2020, 9:03 pm
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My husband loves fashion. But thankfully (for me. I would hate it) comments on my clothes other than to compliment. No suggestions here. Sorry
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Malkqueen
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Tue, Nov 17 2020, 10:28 pm
My husband definitely has a taste in my clothing. He prefers young and trendy; I'm more of a Misook and St. John dresser 😉. I try to lean to the trendy side for him, and he accepts my classy taste that remains predominant despite my efforts to change. A major compliment for me was when he said I look best when I feel good about what I'm wearing, even if it's something he doesn't objectively like!
Does your husband ever compliment something you're wearing or point out one of your outfits as being more to his taste? If you can get him to he a bit specific about what he does like, you can then aim for a similar style.
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amother
Floralwhite
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Tue, Nov 17 2020, 10:41 pm
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DH always comments on my clothes criticism or compliments
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amother
cornflower
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Tue, Nov 17 2020, 10:45 pm
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Dh wouldn’t know the difference if I was wearing a burlap sack.
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amother
Copper
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 8:45 am
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DH has no clue about fashion but will tell me if he particularly likes an outfit on me-if it's really flattering or makes me look good (ie clings or accentuates specific areas). But then I don't care much about fashion either so it's all good.
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mochamix18
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 8:50 am
Not fully on topic but my mom bought me a Misook skirt for shabbos when I was in college 20 years ago (it had to have been on sale). I would ask if that means that I dressed like a Bubbie in college but I think I already know the answer...
On the topic of my husband, he thought my clothing was bland and boring when we dated and now he barely has an opinion.
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amother
Aubergine
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 8:50 am
DH does Not know fashion. We recently went to a trendy women's sale and I tried on a few trendy two piece sets and he said they looked like pajamas. My SIL asked us to pick up one for her (she knew her size) and DH was like this is actually popular???
He DOES have an opinion about anything I buy. Or anything in general. As do I. When we first got married DH couldn't understand how I could go shopping without him. What if he doesn't like what I buy? "DH, all the clothing I have from before I met you. You like, right?" "Yeah pretty much". "So there! Worse comes to worse we may have to exchange something if you hate it. But that probably won't happen often."
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amother
Emerald
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 8:56 am
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I don't know much about fashion, but I dress pretty well and current. Dh knows zilch. He'll try to notice when I'm wearing something new, (only after I've pointed it out a few times and explained that I appreciate it when he does). I only remember him remarking negatively about my outfit twice. Once was when I got a dress that had a large panel made out of puffer material, he asked if it's a dress or a coat. Not critical, just wanted to know if I'd wear a coat or jacket in addition to the dress. Once was when I wore a very oversized one size fits all dress, he asked if I think it may look maternity.
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amother
Royalblue
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 9:21 am
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 6:31 pm
I didn't mean to offend by the Misook comment. Its just like a brand considered more mature. I am sure some of their clothes are fine. 
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 6:35 pm
Thank you for the suggestions. I can see myself buying some of these.
Right???!!.
I think he's so used to seeing everyone wear black and gray that thinks color is too young. I like florals, color, etc. and when I wear dark solids its loose and casual.
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amother
Cyan
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 6:37 pm
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My husband loves when I wear color, but I like a classic palette. He'll comment about how much he loves what I'm wearing when I wear something bright.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 6:42 pm
| Malkqueen wrote: | My husband definitely has a taste in my clothing. He prefers young and trendy; I'm more of a Misook and St. John dresser 😉. I try to lean to the trendy side for him, and he accepts my classy taste that remains predominant despite my efforts to change. A major compliment for me was when he said I look best when I feel good about what I'm wearing, even if it's something he doesn't objectively like!
Does your husband ever compliment something you're wearing or point out one of your outfits as being more to his taste? If you can get him to he a bit specific about what he does like, you can then aim for a similar style. |
Yes. but to get a compliment I have to be wearing perfect makeup, ALL my jewelry, and an outfit he likes with shoes that match. No easy feat. haha. Ok. I can get a compliment without all that, but he'd say "ok, you don't have normal shoes". or "where's your bracelet? I like booties (he hates), I hate wearing a lot of jewelry. he doesn't understand not wearing it all. I like mixing a casual t-shirt with a more formal skirt and a sweater, he needs everything to "be a set".
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amother
Orange
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 6:54 pm
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I wear a particular style across the board, my ex DH didn't like it. He said I "couldn't pull off" wearing that style. I got rid of him, and kept the glasses he hated.
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amother
Royalblue
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 6:58 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | Thank you for the suggestions. I can see myself buying some of these.
Right???!!.
I think he's so used to seeing everyone wear black and gray that thinks color is too young. I like florals, color, etc. and when I wear dark solids its loose and casual. |
This is just an idea of what’s young enough but old enough. Tell him that color and floral is in
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Malkqueen
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 8:15 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | | Yes. but to get a compliment I have to be wearing perfect makeup, ALL my jewelry, and an outfit he likes with shoes that match. No easy feat. haha. Ok. I can get a compliment without all that, but he'd say "ok, you don't have normal shoes". or "where's your bracelet? I like booties (he hates), I hate wearing a lot of jewelry. he doesn't understand not wearing it all. I like mixing a casual t-shirt with a more formal skirt and a sweater, he needs everything to "be a set". |
It sounds like he likes the very put-together look.
Does he expect you to dress that way at all times, or just when you go out/are with him at public venues? If it's how he wants you to dress when you're with him, it's an easier fix, but if he's critical of your appearance on a daily basis then I think your problem does belong in the Shalom Bayis category.
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SuperWify
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Wed, Nov 18 2020, 8:24 pm
| amother [ Orange ] wrote: | | I wear a particular style across the board, my ex DH didn't like it. He said I "couldn't pull off" wearing that style. I got rid of him, and kept the glasses he hated. |
Sorry about your divorce but you made me LOL the way you put it 
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