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What is considered an average salary?
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 10:34 am
amother [ Chocolate ] wrote:
I think the key word here is "tri state area". It's reassurance to those that aren't making six figures if they live OOT (and also if they are in chinuch so are getting tuition subsidized, let's call a spade a spade).

Also, costs have gotten higher (something called inflation), plus housing costs in frum communities have gone through the roof, so while it was possible to live on $100K 10 years ago, it is not the same today.


What is SO much more expensive on the east coast? Housing - fine, I will agree to that. Tuition- no. Easily 10,000 a kid. Kosher food- no. It is way more. Those are the major expenses in my opinion.
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amother




Firebrick
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 10:35 am
amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:
My husband makes over 200k in Lakewood. From my experience, either you are on all programs and barely making anything or you are making a good comfortable income. This is from my circles.

Or you’re making somewhere in between like us... I mean there’s all types
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amother




Beige
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 10:41 am
There are some neighborhoods in the tristate area that are really very low maintenance.
I live in one.
I know its hard to wrap your brain around this if you don't grow up with it, but many people do without what is seen as essential by others. Example: Car ownership
Another example: We dress what I consider well, but no brand names and we don't have a huge collection of stuff. We just shop savvy and sensibly and use our nice stuff often instead of sparingly (which happens when you have too many things).
Ditto for simchas that others need a second mortgage for.
This lifestyle also leaves lots of room to save up and invest for long term opportunities.
No, I will not claim that the majority of people live this way, but there are people like this.
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amother




Firebrick
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 10:41 am
amother [ Magenta ] wrote:
Part of the problem is the high standards of living and everyone needing the same clothes and shoes and everything. Not buying your kids the right shoes is considered abusive these days.

So true. I just had a baby born much after my oldest few. I splurged on a really nice stroller. It wouldn’t have dawned on me to buy anything remotely in this price range with my first. And we were both working then. Most of my original baby items were gifts from parents, in laws etc. A select few people I knew bought the bugaboo. Now it’s standard to get a $500 car seat along with at least one expensive stroller.

ETA - I know these expensive items are often gifts as well, I just meant that it’s a given that everyone needs these items.
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amother




Firebrick
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 10:43 am
amother [ Crimson ] wrote:
What is SO much more expensive on the east coast? Housing - fine, I will agree to that. Tuition- no. Easily 10,000 a kid. Kosher food- no. It is way more. Those are the major expenses in my opinion.

It’s probably largely lifestyle.
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 10:44 am
amother [ Firebrick ] wrote:
It’s probably largely lifestyle.


I agree. And that is a choice. Not a need.
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amother




Royalblue
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:06 am
amother [ Violet ] wrote:
For those of us that do with less, this is my restructuring your numbers:

$1400 a month mortgage
$250 maximum a month utilities
$500 a month food
$10 maximum a month clothing (buy second hand for a maximum of $120/year)
$420 a month car expense - two cars, gas, plus insurance
$3000 a month tuition/babysitting
$0 work related expenses because gas is already in the car category
$0 a month cleaning help

A $500 misc category seems very, very large to me.

Therefore, we have money for therapy for the dc that needs, savings, and tzedekah.

It's about counting pennies and not buying. Most people won't want to live our way but we are happy


I live in Lakewood! Please tell me where you can get a house for so cheap?? That’s the price my friends are all paying for basement rent
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amother




Burlywood
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:07 am
Interesting that people consider living in the Tristate so expensive. We would love to move back to my husband's hometown of Toronto, but houses in the frum community start over a million, and that is for a fixer upper. Tuition is vastly more expensive as well.
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amother




Royalblue
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:08 am
amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:
Interesting that people consider living in the Tristate so expensive. We would love to move back to my husband's hometown of Toronto, but houses in the frum community start over a million, and that is for a fixer upper. Tuition is vastly more expensive as well.


Just because it can be more expensive there doesn’t make it cheap here....
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amother




Violet
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:30 am
amother [ Royalblue ] wrote:
I live in Lakewood! Please tell me where you can get a house for so cheap?? That’s the price my friends are all paying for basement rent


I live in Baltimore in a small semi-detached home. The 1400 also includes property taxes and home insurance because we pay it together. Homes in my neighborhood range from 185k to 250k depending on the state of the home. You can live on less in Baltimore if you choose a cheap neighborhood without peer pressure.
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amother




Sapphire
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:39 am
amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:
Interesting that people consider living in the Tristate so expensive. We would love to move back to my husband's hometown of Toronto, but houses in the frum community start over a million, and that is for a fixer upper. Tuition is vastly more expensive as well.


The housing there comes out cheaper than mine in Lakewood because of property taxes. My brother just bought a 1.5 million house there.
You can get a really nice break on tuition there if you need it- Lakewood doesn’t give tuition breaks.
Baby bonus adds up to a nice amount of cash every month.
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amother




Violet
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:45 am
amother [ Peach ] wrote:
You save $3000 a month? $36,000 a year, after taxes. So that's, what, at least $60,000 gross.

3 kids, minimum tuition is $18,000. So, $28,000 gross?

Cheap house or rent of $1500 per month, plus taxes and utilities, let's call it $2000. $24,000 a year. $40,000 gross?

You're edging up close to $130,000 a year without buying food, or clothing, or health insurance, or transportation.

So how much under $200 do you make?


I'd rather not disclose everything about myself. However, right now, we are about 30k below 200k. We have lived off very little at times especially while we were both in school. People have been in disbelief about how we've managed on as little as we did at times. We've also never had monetary help from family, and we've helped them many times over the years. I have my own crazy theories about what percentage of income can maximally go onto different categories to live a frum life. I have thought about being a budgeting counselor many times but I love my job, it pays well BH, and most people are not willing to live the way we live.
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saw50st8




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 11:50 am
I wonder if smaller COVID weddings are going to start being a little more standard once COVID is over. There is a lot of money that can be saved that way.

I don't understand how people paying full tuition can live on so little. I don't have a high end lifestyle (our biggest splurge is our $1500/year gardener and we don't even have that yearly). We have no cleaning help, older cars with no payments, affordable health care through work...my tuition bill is $44,000 for 4 kids. That's over 60k gross. When my oldest is in 12th grade, my tuition bill will be $100,000 (3 in high school, 1 in elementary school). That's going to be net pay.

I've compared my expenses to my friends out of town and largely they were similar. Their tuition was often higher than mine and their food bill for kosher meat/chicken was more expensive for less. We were pretty close to each other budget wise.
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amother




Amber
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 12:14 pm
full tuition in different communities is different. chassidish tuition "in town" is less then yesheivish which is often less then MO.
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amother




Scarlet
 

Post  Fri, Nov 20 2020, 12:17 pm
amother [ Smokey ] wrote:
I think Monsey schools have very varied tuitions- Chasidish mosdos are way cheaper than for example YSV. Same with real estate taxes- one of you could be paying $12k one could be paying $30k


My housing bh isnt alot. We purchased a house at the right time.

I have 1 elementary 2 HS - we pay a reduced rate, non chasidish. Tuition is still alot. 1 in college, not eligible for anything.

All out income is reported.

We also save. We have a nice 401k and some stocks.

We are in "debt". Its really self debt, kind of. I was a sahm for years. Dh isnt around and I didn't want all my income to go to a sitter and cleaning help. We refinanced to combine all our debt recently.

We dont consider camp or braces a luxury. We pay for both every month, payment plan.
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amother




Green
 

Post  Sat, Nov 21 2020, 11:13 am
amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:
Interesting that people consider living in the Tristate so expensive. We would love to move back to my husband's hometown of Toronto, but houses in the frum community start over a million, and that is for a fixer upper. Tuition is vastly more expensive as well.


Healthcare costs are lower, and usually, there's less emphasis on clothes and brands and fancy upgrades of all sorts that can be standard in the greater NY area.
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