How do you approach food choices for your kids?

amother

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 6:41 pm

I'm wondering how positive parents approach food?
Or the ones who are saying to never say no?

If I would allow my children to eat whatever they want they would want pizza, shabbos cereal, tradition soups, candy, etc every day. As it is they get so much soda and junk from school.

How do you limit unhealthy or expensive foods? Or you don't?

amother

Slateblue

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 7:30 pm

I voted that they can eat whatever they want whenever they want, but my kids in general don't like junk food very much. They were always used to eating relatively healthy, they don't like soda, so it was easy to choose that. If they always craved junk food, I probably would have to limit it somehow.

amother

Seagreen

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 7:35 pm

I limit in the sense that I do all the grocery shopping.

I like my family to eat healthy so there is no junk food here. I will bake a dessert for Shabbos but the rest of the week the only dessert is fruit. There is no candy here. No soda. Very little processed foods.

When we eat out (restaurant or someone's house) I let them enjoy what they like. I encourage them to make the best of bad food choices when at a party or school celebration (pretty rare in these days) - not to be totally deprived. And if they eat complete garbage while out I don't give them a hard time. Most of what they eat is at home and healthy and that's good enough. Kosher is Torah. Health food is not Torah.

amother

Teal

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 7:39 pm

We have a routine that they are accustomed to. They are used to having a piece of junk after dinner, but not any after breakfast or in their school lunch.

For meals, they can eat the meal served or any leftovers from the past day or two that are still around. We set them up to succeed by serving meals that we know they have been willing to eat in the past. But if one doesn't want the meal, we always have some leftovers that work as a substitute meal.

flowerpower

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 7:49 pm

I don’t have much junk in the house. Most mezonos products are whole wheat. They can have what they want when they want BUT with permission and guidance. Meaning if my kid asks for cereal I’ll allow him one bowl( he used to eat 3!) and then guide him to the produce bin. If he wants a wafer he can have one but after dinner. Ages 12 and up can do as they please. So far they eat with a plan so no need for portion control lectures etc.

amother

Ivory

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 8:03 pm

I try to follow Ellyn Satters division of responsibility in feeding. I decide what to offer and when to offer it, kids decide which of the options to choose from and how much. I don’t follow this all the way though, I do put a limit on sweets and certain other foods because my kids crave them more than regular and are not able to regulate their intake.

amother

Burlywood

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 8:26 pm

Did you all grow up this way?

I grew up with no limitations on eating at all and I struggled with weight all my life and currently still do.

I want better for my kids, who are still very little, but I have no idea what to do. I read Ellyn Satter when my son was 2, and I've tried implementing her DOR, but my now 4 yo is so picky and so ill-behaved around food. I don't know how to act when he doesn't follow the DOR and has a tantrum about what/when to eat.

So I voted yes, I limit what, because I don't let them eat junk whenever they want. But I don't feel comfortable limiting the "when" because what if they are hungry? What if they didn't eat enough at school and are starving and my snack isn't enough?

I feel like people who were raised with limitations will do a better job at incorporating them in their lives.

zigi

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 8:38 pm

pizza they can have if they don't want the supper or I know that one of my kids hates meatsauce etc.. they make sandwhiches I guess a pre supper. noodles soups also. there are apples and fruit in easy reach. chips and veggie straws also popcorn too. also cereal and milk. yogurts etc. I limit if I bought one for each kid and someone wants more.
my kids like healthy food too. salads, tomatoes etc. fozen berries

amother

cornflower

Thu, Nov 19 2020, 9:09 pm

As Cyan stated above, you don't mention kids ages. I have very limited say on what my kids eat- ill say if something is being saved and they can't have something or if we are having dinner soon or I will suggest something, but IMO there is a lint to what you can say to 17 &19 yo DDs.

amother

Honeydew

Fri, Nov 20 2020, 3:31 am

But how do you limit it without the kids being resentful and craving it even more?
My mom let us eat what we wanted within reason, ie limited candy and only on shabbos. But I grew up craving candy and cookies. Even as an older kid when I coulf eat whatever I wanted. I would stuff my face at others homes and out the house. Still now, I eat more than I should.

How do I bring up my kids so that they wont be so obsessed with food?

amother

Sienna

Fri, Nov 20 2020, 4:14 am

I voted the last option.
One of my kids is allergic to everything, so I limit what he eats for his own health.
But everyone else can reach the food and take what they want when they want. Don’t be fooled, it’s not a free for all. They eat at meal and snack times (naturally). No one is just noshing all day long because they can reach the snacks. They have access to cereal, yogurts, and snack. Lunch is in school. And for supper, I make food that they like, and they can eat when they’re ready.

amother

Royalblue

Fri, Nov 20 2020, 4:18 am

My kid is still young so it’s not such a fight yet. Meals I offer 3 healthy foods I know she likes to choose between (95% of the time 2 of them are cheese and vitamin enriched oatmeal). Snacks she asks for a healthy one most of the time, occasionally I’ll offer bamba or sweet potato chips. She gets a treat on shabbos. She samples grown up good when we eat dinner. The one food we have to fight about is that she loves croutons- they’re only for shabbos.

amother

Ivory

Fri, Nov 20 2020, 4:21 am

amother [ Honeydew ] wrote:

The cookie and candy cravings aren’t necessarily because your mom limited you. Some people biologically have very strong food cravings and obsessions.

Rappel

Fri, Nov 20 2020, 4:22 am

amother [ Cyan ] wrote:

Your poll doesn’t consider the age of the kids. I voted Yes on what and when, but mine are all preschoolers.

Similar answer here.

I don't buy junk food or sugar drinks or tradition soups. If their friends offer them some, then I say yes for social reasons. The available snacks at home are generally fruit. Shabbat they can bring chips to the park, and or pretzels. We do bake, but we try to bake healthy, and they always end up distributing most of the goods to their friends.

Will it always be this way? Maybe, maybe not. But while I have control over their eating habits, I let them eat whatever they want, whenever they want, along those guidelines. Meals I only serve at given times, but snacks are always available.

Last edited by Rappel on Fri, Nov 20 2020, 4:39 am; edited 1 time in total

Teomima

Fri, Nov 20 2020, 4:36 am

I really didn't know how to answer your poll.

For the most part I don't buy junk food. I have some snacks like pretzels packed away, but I generally don't buy treats. We make most of our "junk food" from scratch, so I'll make stovetop popcorn when we want something salty, or bake cookies when we want chocolate. When I do make these things the kids can have them freely but I don't have a full cookie jar just sitting around or anything.

My kids also don't drink soda, not at home nor out of the house. They rarely get junk at school or anywhere else, either. When they do, like at a birthday party, I don't limit it since it's an occasional treat.