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WWYD, classmate told DD she cheats on all her tests

 
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 5:26 pm
Title says it all. DD is in 9th grade. Trying to find herself. And make friends. A girl who she thought might have potential to be a friend told her today that she cheats on all her tests. Sits in the back and keeps papers and notes out. DD is not happy, and feels very bothered. I'm assuming she shouldn't tell anyone as girl will get into major trouble, she now has zero interest in being her aquaintance, and DD now feels very burdened knowing this information. She says she would have rather not known. How do we proceed from here?
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amother




Seashell
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 5:30 pm
It's really not her concern. It's best to learn that you will see all sorts of things in life and unless someone is in danger, walk away.
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Success10




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 5:32 pm
I would take this opportunity to sit with dd and ask HER what she thinks is the best course of action. Let her voice all the pros and cons of each choice. Let her use her own wisdom to work this out, with your support.

Yes, she should stay away from this girl. No, she should not tell on her. But your dd is a big girl already, let her try to come to those conclusions herself. It seems she basically has already.
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 5:40 pm
Who says that cheating on tests is a bad thing?

Actually, it might be that the teacher quietly allows it. And that would be a wise move, because you never learn better than when you really need the information. Cheating on a test would be such a situation.
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Reality




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 6:16 pm
What odd responses!

I would tell my daughter I don't think she is the friend for her. This girl will be caught one day and she will get into trouble and possibly drag my daughter with her.

Something similar happened to my daughter in 9th grade.
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ExtraCredit




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 6:22 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote:
Who says that cheating on tests is a bad thing?

Actually, it might be that the teacher quietly allows it. And that would be a wise move, because you never learn better than when you really need the information. Cheating on a test would be such a situation.

😳🤔 Scratching Head
If the teacher would allow it, the girl wouldn’t tell her friend that she “cheated”.
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amother




Seagreen
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 6:27 pm
I had friends in high school who cheated. If they wouldn't have cheated, they would have failed all their tests which would have caused a ruckus, they would have been pulled out of class and given all sorts of "special treatment" and then they would have all that stigma attached to them when it came time for shidduchim. I believe cheating is very wrong but I think some girls do it for survival?!
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amother




Blush
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 6:45 pm
I feel bad that grades are so important to that girl that she would want to cheat. I tell my kids I don't care if they get a poor grade.

Showing up and learning, behaving, doing your assignments - that's important. The number the teacher gives you - really not.

I don't have a high school diploma. Has literally NEVER impacted my life. Including being employed by that same school.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Nov 26 2020, 6:49 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote:
Who says that cheating on tests is a bad thing?

Actually, it might be that the teacher quietly allows it. And that would be a wise move, because you never learn better than when you really need the information. Cheating on a test would be such a situation.


This has got to be one of the craziest responses I have ever heard.
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