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Forum
-> Parenting our children
thegiver
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 Thu, Dec 31 2020, 9:57 pm
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How do you find a balance? Someone is frequenting our home more than a few nights a week and it's taking away from the paltry time we have together as a family. How do you strike a balance btwn hachnosas orchim and making family a priority?
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zaq
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Thu, Dec 31 2020, 10:57 pm
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There's no mathematical formula; this is something you have to work out for yourself, taking into account the feelings and needs of all family members. Family has to come first IMHO, and if anyone in the family is feeling neglected, stressed, or uncomfortable, then this guest has got to go. Not to mention that with the current pandemic, you shouldn't be allowing guests to hang out in your home, anyway.
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amother
Firebrick
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Thu, Dec 31 2020, 11:09 pm
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First find out what falls under the categories of true hachnasas orchim, kibbud horim, and chesed. Then decide for yourself how to have it play out in the short term and the long term.
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pizza4
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Thu, Dec 31 2020, 11:11 pm
Do you need to actively entertain them? Or can you meanwhile be playing a game with the kids? I've done this sometimes. I can't always stop everything and sit down to be a polite hostess. If I'm in the middle of doing something in the kitchen, I can invite the person to schmooze with me there.
I'm assuming your guest is also someone who comes all the time, often without calling before.
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lucky14
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Thu, Dec 31 2020, 11:39 pm
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Depends on the specifics of the situation but I strongly suggest making sure you have that family time. Family is priority. You will need to give more details if you want more specific help figuring things out though.
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