Frum, accepting, open minded community for chilled chasidim

Amelia Bedelia

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:07 pm

amother [ Mint ] wrote:

Maybe Toms River would work for you.
Outskirts of Lakewood, lots of Chassidish chilled people.

Was also going to suggest Toms River.

Look into Miami or the upcoming chassidish community in Tampa. I think Tampa would be too chassidish for you, but definitely look into it.

amother

Beige

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:13 pm

amother [ Mint ] wrote:

Maybe Toms River would work for you.
Outskirts of Lakewood, lots of Chassidish chilled people.

I think the same

amother

Bisque

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:19 pm

Check out Royal Grove in Jackson. Its mostly chassidish

realsilver

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:21 pm

I was going to say Toms River as well.

amother

Maroon

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:25 pm

amother [ Green ] wrote:

I don't know if this is for you, but it works for my husband and I. I am probably totally outing myself here... hence, posting as amother. My husband was brought up in Williamsburg, in a very Satmar family. I was brought up not chassidish, but do have a few chassidish family members. When I married him, I tried to fit in with the chassidish lifestyle, but slowly, I started being put off by the chassidish attitude. We were living in Boro Park first (I'm from England) and I could not find my place. We then moved to Monsey, thinking maybe chilled chassidish is for us, but again there is a certain attitude that didnt work for us. I'm pretty frum, but disagree was adding on extremes and focusing on chumras and family traditions instead of actual halacha. My husband also started seeing how we just don't fit in or agree with the chassidish way, he found a non chassidish rov he liked and the only thing making us chassidish was my husbands shtreimel. My husband has a very non chassidish personality. He is very out of towny personality wise, he is not a loud, ambitious chassid type of person. He hates being late and he is very refined and open to all people. The problem we had with Monsey was I didn't fit in with the crowd AND, the main problem - schools. We didn't like the chassidish schools and the non chassidish schools wouldn't take our kids because technically we are chassidish. We ended up moving to Clifton, NJ, which is basically Passaic but a younger crowd. It was the best move for us. The shul is very accepting of my husband, although he is the only shtreimel and I finally feel at home. I'm not judged how I dress my kids, or that I don't speak Yiddish, etc. Everyone around is so friendly and open. And OMG, we send to the Clifton Cheder and could not be happier, it was the best move for us! I don't know if this would for you, we had a very individual situation. But, if you can relate and are not looking to davka, bring up your kids in a chassidish way then this may work for you too.

No way! I kept asking ppl if there are any shtreimels in Clifton because for many reasons we want to move there. We are also a chassidish/ frum BY mix but not chassidish light. We’re having a hard time in monsey for that reason.

amother

Crimson

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:36 pm

amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:

I heard munkatch in monsey is accepting

Sorry, you've got very wrong information. My kids are in that yeshiva, they are very stringent and strict with frumkeit rules.

amother

Aubergine

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 1:39 pm

There is a new chassidish community going up in Arizona.
I can find out where it is, I think it's about 40 minutes from Phoenix.
There are currently families under contract there.

amother

Tan

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 2:24 pm

I'm not OP but I am in a Similar situation so I'm following along here . Just asking . Isny Tom's river similar like monsey? I dont know why I have the feeling that people there can be judgemental as well. I think judgemental can be found everywhere . I think as you describe what your looking for Florida sounds like a match . My dream for my next move .

amother

Mint

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 2:39 pm

amother [ Tan ] wrote:

People live spread apart. All kinds of people.
I would say less judgmental than Jackson.
Maybe go to Toms River for a shabbos.

amother

Green

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 2:58 pm

amother [ Maroon ] wrote:

We are one of the only ones and we basically don't consider ourselves chassidish, beside the shtreimel.

thunderstorm

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 3:02 pm

amother [ Green ] wrote:

Come be my neighbor! LOL

Not many shtreimels here, we were told there are 3 total in the whole Passaic/Clifton, which is actually a very big community. The shtreimel really doesn't mean much to us, it's just a piece of clothing. We aren't any different than those around us and thankfully aren't treated different either..

this sounds like the place suitable for my family. But I’m not so sure DH wants to move to another area in the tri state. But you never know, I may end up joining you one day there.

amother

Green

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 3:05 pm

amother [ Tan ] wrote:

There is judgemental and then there is in-town style. (My perspective anyway.) Judgemental means judging those religious wise, like if someone dress or acts less 'frum' than them, they judge them as less than. I don't think it is as strong in Tom's River as Boro Park. Then there is in-town style which I think is still very much the attitude in Tom's River. All kids have to be dressed with the in style fashion, if you don't have a doona or bugaboo (or whatever stroller is in) then you're looked at differently.

pause

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 3:34 pm

What about Baltimore?

amother

Powderblue

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 3:53 pm

amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:

I heard munkatch in monsey is accepting

Not sure where you heard that. They actually have a very strict vetting system. Most Mosdos in Monsey do especially if you're Chassidish and they expect you to look and be a certain way.
OP I second Toms River and seems like you should look into Clifton. Would you consider Eretz Yisroel.

DallasIma

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 4:22 pm

As you see from my sn, I live in Dallas. I've lived in this community for 17 years and have never seen a community so warm, open-minded, and accepting. In fact I am accepted even though my husband isn't frum! Dallas does have a Chabad shul, but everyone of every persuasion goes to whatever shul they find most comfortable. There's also a Chofetz Chaim shul, a more black-hattish type of shul, and a Sephardic shul, and all of them including the Chabad shul are within walking distance of my house, and we've been in all of them at one time or another. These 4 are in my neighborhood; there's also another neighborhood about 7 miles south of me with a Sephardic shul, a black-hat shul, and a MO shul. Each of the 2 neighborhoods has its own eruv. I don't have kids of school age so I only know in a general way about schools here, but there are schools and also mikvahs, and there's a wonderful infrastructure also as far as kosher markets and such.

amother

Firebrick

Fri, Jan 08 2021, 4:39 pm

There is no current chassidish community in Florida. There are chassidim scattered around and a couple of shtiebels but not any sort of cohesive community. The kids go to the community schools.

LovesHashem

Sat, Jan 09 2021, 10:51 am

Breslov is Israel.

FranticFrummie

Sat, Jan 09 2021, 2:48 pm

Beit Shemesh! Aleph is the "upper class Anglo" area. There's also many other suburban areas like Sheinfeld and Givat Sharet (where I am) that are very live and let live.

I find the Chassidish and Yeshivish people to be very accepting and friendly for the most part, even though I'm a dati/leumi MO type.

The way America is going these days, I don't see much of a future for Jews there. If ever there was a time to come HOME, now is the time.

amother

Wine

Sat, Jan 09 2021, 6:51 pm

Following this because I’m in the same situation. Only difference is that my husband is very chassidish, and does need to be surrounded by very chassidish people. Where won’t we be considered weird if I’m not chasidish and husband very chassidish?

ra_mom

Sat, Jan 09 2021, 7:45 pm

There was some article in Ami about the chassidish Baltimore community looking to expand. Seems they currently have 50 chassidish families and 100 ppl in shul, IIRC.