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English3




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 3:57 am
If you read mishpacha you will know all about man with a pan. It's a fascinating read of men in the kitchen, but what interests me more is that most of them don't eat basic traditional food. Some skip fish egg and even cholent. And these are hiemish askenazic people. What happened to tradition? As well can you explain me what it feels like shabbos with a regular weekday supper. Are you the kind that eats Mac and cheese all week that this feels like a fancy meal?
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English3




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 4:00 am
I just reread my post I hope it doesn't sound condensing I am just genuinely curious what it's like a shabbos meal with out tradition
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LovesHashem




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 4:06 am
There's lot of tradition in other foods. They have Challah, some. Type of fish, meat or chicken, grape juice. That's the basics of shabbos!

I personally don't like fish egg, liver, cholent (I prefer not to even be in a room with the smell so the weeks DH is fine passing on it are amazing!), kugels, Deli rolls, gefilte fish, etc.

I definitely feel like my shabbos meals are traditional.

The Torah says wine, fish, chicken/meat, and Challah. There's the courses traditionally. We have chicken soup always. And I look forward to my shabbos.
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Chickensoupprof




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 4:15 am
My DH parents went BT when he was 6, for a long time he didn't had any frum meals, when he was in yeshivah he had a side job as a mashgiach in the catering he didn't even know about most of the traditional food! My husband is very easy cook but doesn't experiment often... before he knew me he always ahd shabbos out, sometimes in the winter he would put some things on the blech he bought at the store and eat that. I love cooking and baking so that is what I do.
I know one rabbi who makes the best cholent and he makes in that household most of the dibs and dishes his wife only does the kugel and the cakes if I recall correctly. I know a woman, who told me she doesn't like cooking, she bakes the challes, dibs, and salads but that's it. Her husband on Rosh hashana once bent over backwards to get a piece of sheep meat (sheep not lamb), marinated it for hours and everything his wife ''I haven't seen him the last few days he was busy all the time with that sheep''. The sheep was really good though. My father is a BBQ fan, the whole summer he is busy with that. It depends on the person.
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twizzlers1




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 4:37 am
I thought all the things they make look really yummy. Definitely Not at all like a week day dinner in my house.I do serve chicken and potatoes sometimes during the week and I compare the exact same meal for Shabbos too. as long as my family is happy eating healthy delicious food to me that is the most important. I don't even make regular challah. I usually make rolls with garlic.
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English3




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 4:45 am
It's really interesting BC some people don't even use a white shabbos tablecloth but I guess just the shabbos lecht with the dishes and zemiros makes an atmosphere as well
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kalsee




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 5:02 am
I feel like it's somewhat repetitive.
They never have disaster stories Smile
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FranticFrummie




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 6:51 am
I don't recall anything in the Shulchan Aruch that says that gefilte fish and cholent are min har Sinai. I'm pretty sure they didn't have fancy plastic disposable plastic plates back then, either.

I like that they try to incorporate dishes from their childhood, like stuff their bubbe used to cook. I remember one issue had a guy who's grandparents were from Hungary. Another one was Sephardic on one side of his family, and he made Moroccan fish.

I do think it's a bit annoying that the article has the feeling of "Oh hey, men are cooking!" Meanwhile, most of us have been doing this day in and day out, all year round.

Show me a man who gives birth and nurses for 2 years, and then I'll be impressed. Show me a man who can give birth to 10 kids, all of them 11 months apart, and I'll personally come over and cook for him.
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PinkFridge




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:07 am
Some pretty traditional people skip fish at every meal. Will have one entree before cholent and that could be fish/liver egg/deli salad, etc. I have no issue with the lack of heimishkeit in the menus.
I do think the menus are excessive, unless they're for a big crowd. One example: you really just need one main protein for the main course - chicken or meat, not both. As long as the leftovers, if any, aren't wasted, I'll fargin the cooks.

ETA: I'm sure someone from Family First is reading this, but maybe we should write letters.
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watergirl




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:13 am
English3 wrote:
It's really interesting BC some people don't even use a white shabbos tablecloth but I guess just the shabbos lecht with the dishes and zemiros makes an atmosphere as well

Your comments and OP make it seem like you feel the only correct way to make a shabbos table is the way you were brought up with and what you do now.

English3 wrote:
If you read mishpacha you will know all about man with a pan. It's a fascinating read of men in the kitchen, but what interests me more is that most of them don't eat basic traditional food. Some skip fish egg and even cholent. And these are hiemish askenazic people. What happened to tradition? As well can you explain me what it feels like shabbos with a regular weekday supper. Are you the kind that eats Mac and cheese all week that this feels like a fancy meal?

Firstly, who said these people are all heimish? Or all Ashkenazi? Mishpacha has sefardic readers and sefardic contributors. Also many awesome basteli teshuvahs and geirim. Or all interested in “traditional”? And - who says what traditional must be? I am ashkenazi but did not grow up with egg, cholent, or fish. Shabbos was a nice meal we ate together. Challah and kiddush. Of course, shabbos candles. Those are the three main components. Everything else is fill in the blanks.

Maybe the family does not like eggs/fish/cholent? Maybe they do like those things but like to change it up and have variety some weeks?

English3 wrote:
I just reread my post I hope it doesn't sound condensing I am just genuinely curious what it's like a shabbos meal with out tradition

Why do you feel that what is “tradition” for you is tradition for others? Answer your question asking if some people have a weeknight meal on Shabbos... I have no idea what your family serves on weeknights. I am assuming that what we serve on most shabbos IS a weeknight dinner for you. Along with kiddush and challah, we usually have soup (not always), sometimes fish, and usually some kind of chicken with potatoes or rice. if I have time, I will make kugel. Ok, so? Oh, and we are chassidish.

I hope that you are reading through the magazines and through this site with an open mind and can enjoy learning and realizing that most Jews are not just like you. We are all so very different.
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chanchy123




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:14 am
I’m not familiar with the column, but I think we have very different concepts about what a Shabbat meal means (I suspect also what an everyday mean entails too).
There is no Halacha that one must eat the exact same menu their ancestors ate in Europe (especially if they never came from Europe or left Europe over a century ago). You’re supposed to eat special delicious foods whatever that means to you. Whether it’s sushi pizza lasagna or gefilta fish.
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amother




Silver
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:19 am
My dh regularly cooks Shabbat meals, partially because I work out of the house while he's at home. He also loves cooking. Most of what he produces are fancy chicken or beef dishes. But he is adamant about cholent being a winter food. During the summer, from Pesach until Sukkot, we are a cholent-free zone. And he can't stand kugel, all year round. There is no halacha about eating them... so, does that make us reform? Wink
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amother




Coral
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:20 am
Is this the article?
https://mishpacha.com/column/man-with-a-pan/
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amother




Cyan
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:23 am
Op, you're obviously chassidish. No one besides chassidim is so strict about the same shabbos menu week after week (and I'm aware that some chassidim are not so strict either). I don't know why you assume that all the people are chassidish too.. they're very obviously not. The foods you call traditional are only traditional for you, not for people from other communities.
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amother




Vermilion
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 7:50 am
I remember being surprised about that a few years back too. Then I came to realize that many many people do not serve the traditional meal I grew up with gefilte fish, chicken soup, chicken ,kugel and it is ok. There are so many different ways to be mechabed a shobbos seuda.
After a while it got to be too much food for our little family and besides we were all just waiting for the chicken anyway so we dropped the fish and soup. I still feel like it is a special shobbos meal because we eat in the dining room, usually on china with silverware and have roast chicken and kugel talk about the parsha and sing zemiros and have a little something sweet for dessert. When we have guests I make more courses but for just us I feel actually sick after I eat 3 courses. It's just too much food.
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israelmama




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 8:11 am
kalsee wrote:
I feel like it's somewhat repetitive.
They never have disaster stories Smile


At this point I skip over them.. They aren't interesting anymore.

But OP, for sure not everyone written is heimish. why is it a problem to make food you enjoy for Shabbos? There's no halacha that you must eat cholent. Eat anything special that brings you the most joy. For some people it's chicken soup and white tablecloth and another family is a beautiful navy tablecloth and perhaps it's lamb or a 5 cheese lasagna... Shabbos is more than tradition- it's about creating a loving and welcoming atmosphere
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 8:26 am
I’m not chassidish and my family appreciates traditional shabbos food.
I’ve realized that they don’t even want anything gourmet. They just want fresh, tasty food that they enjoy eating.
When I see some of the recipes sometimes I think that just wouldn’t work for us. Sometimes I think some things are a good idea and oh how I wish my dh would be intrested in cooking for us! That would just never happen and I don’t usually have time to experiment. DH would quicker buy food than even attempt to make it himself. Just reading about people’s capable husbands in the kitchen is interesting for me.
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amother




Green
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 8:30 am
amother [ Cyan ] wrote:
Op, you're obviously chassidish. No one besides chassidim is so strict about the same shabbos menu week after week (and I'm aware that some chassidim are not so strict either). I don't know why you assume that all the people are chassidish too.. they're very obviously not. The foods you call traditional are only traditional for you, not for people from other communities.


I'm not the OP, but I completely agree with her and we're not Chassidish at all!

It's very important to DH and his family to eat traditional foods, and it's important to many others as well. Again, we're not Chassidish but this is very important to us (there are other sects of frum Jews who believe in mesorah, just like you!).
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amother




Ginger
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 8:34 am
I tend to wonder with Man with a Pan how their Shabbos food is on an average week. At least one of these guys is making a fancy, very varied meal because he's bored with what his wife makes every week. I know my dh likes all kinds of different things, and if he did a Man with a Pan, he'd go through the cookbooks for interesting things and do a great menu. But he couldn't do it again the next week and the week after that. I bet many of the wives make a couple of these things each week and he made them all.

Our family's meal has evolved over time based on our needs and wants. I used to make certain foods that were traditional, and nobody ate much- it wasn't a good enough reason to just have it on the table. For example, we used to do fish at both meals and found people ate it Friday night but not the day meal, so we stopped. Now we do cholent weekly, but for awhile no one ate it except winter so that's what we did
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allthingsblue




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Jan 13 2021, 8:36 am
The foods in this article are very involved- definitely not to be confused with weekday fare!
I stick to more traditional because it's easier and that what my family likes. I don't want to be up late cooking.
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