Covid consciousness vs mental health
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Post Sun, Jan 24 2021, 9:04 am
imaima wrote:
I don't get it
She wore a mask at home for months? Every day and on weekend? But not in school, to be like her friends?

Yes. Her (and our) concern was never about her getting it, as teens are at very low risk of significant complications. Our concern was about her chas v’shalom passing it on to us (or innocent strangers). To her credit, she was very responsible and did not leave her room without a mask (and washed her hands before touching anything at home) for months. Contrary to what FF is saying - I think that showed responsibility and caring/consideration for others.
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Post Sun, Jan 24 2021, 9:18 am
FranticFrummie wrote:
Wait, she's refusing to mask and SD at school, she gets sick, and then she gets mad at the school and you?

Did I read that right, or am I missing something?

Just my parenting two cents, even though you didn't ask: Letting your teenager do something dangerous just because her friends do it is not what I call great chinuk. Instead, she could set an example and be a positive role model, maybe even inspiring her friends to care about other people's lives, too.

You can show her you care about her feelings, without allowing risky behavior. Show her you care about her health, and the health of others, and that is more important then "feelings".

She’s not mad at us. She’s a bit miffed with her school for putting us all in the position, where choosing to protect ourselves from this virus is viewed as “weird,” crazy,” etc. (She still loves us and her school.)

I don’t know how your community is handling this, but our community is dealing with it by pretending it does not exist. Both in the streets and at home (and in stores, in shuls, at simchos, etc.) there is no masking or sd. Teenagers are especially subject to peer pressure and care excessively about fitting in. It is too much to expect a teenager to go against an entire community (from principals through teachers down to friends) who are all ignoring this virus and acting as normal. (It is difficult enough for us - and we are adults.)

Our compromise was to respect her feelings and let her fit in with her friends, while continuing to take precautions to keep others safe. The virus is not much of a risk to her, and she was thrilled to finally come down with the virus, because now she can stop sd at home too (for three months). It is a risk to us and others and she was careful about that - despite being the only one of her friends to do so. Although she is not currently a risk to anyone, she is still among the very small minority in our community, who wears a mask in the steer - so as not to make a chillul Hashem. I think we balanced the negligible risk to her vs. the more significant risk to us and others with her feelings by working things out the way that we did.
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