My son gets anxious about..

amother

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:11 pm

going to the bathroom for number 2. He is 4 and he always had a hard time with it. One night we were out for a simcha for a few hours and he was complaining the whole time that he wants to go home because he's tired. Then I realized he needs the bathroom but he refused to go. He was walking around sad the whole time. At home he also has it hard. He'll hold it in till the last minute until I realize and send him to go. He has a very hard time with it and gets very anxious over it. Does anyone have any helpful suggestions?

Thanks!

amother

Cobalt

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:31 pm

Would sticker chart work for him?
Positive reinforcement type things?
Special candy (like 2 gushers)
I give my kid books in the bathroom

amother

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:33 pm

amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:

Would sticker chart work for him?
Positive reinforcement type things?
Special candy (like 2 gushers)
I give my kid books in the bathroom

That I could do when I know he has to go but how do I get rid of his fear of going. It's so sad how nervous he gets before. He walks around, pacing back and forth..

amother

Jetblack

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:45 pm

Can you get him a "bathroom game," like a perplexus or handheld tetris-style game to use when on the toilet?

amother

Cobalt

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:46 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

That I could do when I know he has to go but how do I get rid of his fear of going. It's so sad how nervous he gets before. He walks around, pacing back and forth..

Maybe when you see he has to go stop what you’re doing. Go down to his level and give him a hug or something telling him he will feel better if he goes to the bathroom. Everyone needs to go to the bathroom to be healthy. We are so lucky to have working bodies etc... now let’s go get a cool book for you to read in there.

Just talk to him calmly.

amother

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:47 pm

amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:

Can you get him a "bathroom game," like a perplexus or handheld tetris-style game to use when on the toilet?

that's a good idea. Which game would be good for a 4 year old?

amother

Jetblack

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 12:52 pm

amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:

On this note, teaching him to say Asher Yatzar afterwards will also probably help in the long run.

My 4yo loves a calculator lol, but those Shabbos water games https://www.kosherimage.com/watergame.html or similar would be fun, all my kids like the perplexus https://www.amazon.com/PERPLEX.....;th=1

Rabbit613

Tue, Mar 02 2021, 1:36 pm

My son also had alot of anxiety with #2 in the bathroom. He would hold it in for days and it would come out in his underwear. At around age 4 we began a chart system. We got him really big prizes that were very exciting for him. Every time he made in the toilet we put a sticker on his chart and when he finished the chart he got the prize. In the begining he only needed a few stickers on the chart and as he got better we made the charts longer. He is now 6 and the problem is almost totally gone. He still doesn't like to go when he's not home and he doesn't like wiping himself.
Lotz of hatzlacha!