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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 2:44 am
I hate my job working in public school with such a passion and after almost a decade of pushing through I don’t think I can do it anymore. There’s nothing else that would bring in this salary, health benefits, penchant etc. I of course don’t want to cause any financial strain to the fanily. What do I do?

PS: dh thinks I’m crazy for complaining and thinks the perks outweigh the mental stress.
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LondonIma




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 3:26 am
Sorry to hear this struggle. It’s so hard to feel stuck at work. Can you begin training for a new profession alongside your current role so that the financial risk is less?
Would a teaching job in a different school make a difference?
Good luck with it all. Hope you find some fulfilment soon.
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amother




Beige
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 3:39 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I hate my job working in public school with such a passion and after almost a decade of pushing through I don’t think I can do it anymore. There’s nothing else that would bring in this salary, health benefits, penchant etc. I of course don’t want to cause any financial strain to the fanily. What do I do?

PS: dh thinks I’m crazy for complaining and thinks the perks outweigh the mental stress.


Tell me what you hate! Let's work it through!

...And can you rise up the ranks into management? They might have space in their administrative offices.
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amother




Khaki
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 3:41 am
Leave! I did and never looked back. Your dh will LOVE the new you
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 3:59 am
amother [ Khaki ] wrote:
Leave! I did and never looked back. Your dh will LOVE the new you


Please tell me more. I’ll live vicariously through you a bit.
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amother




Orange
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 8:14 am
I'm in a similar situation and I'm just riding it out. 15 years down, 15 more to go to retire.
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singleagain




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 8:47 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:

PS: dh thinks I’m crazy for complaining and thinks the perks outweigh the mental stress.


only you can decide if the perks outweigh the mental stress. You are the one living with the mental stress.

agree with above posters who said work through exactly what it is you like and don't like.

Perhaps make a pro/con list for if you stay. And another pro/con list for if you leave.

I always say to do two because the pros of one is not necessarily a con for the other.
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amother




Natural
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 8:51 am
I don't have any advice but I can relate.

I work in public school too. Getting myself through each year is like pulling teeth. I am only 28 but counting down to retirement.... it is crazy. At this point I do still have an incentive to continue because I am not at the top of my step scale. But I hate being pressured to continue - for the money it brings in, and for the amazing benefits that would cost us an arm and a leg.
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amother




Babypink
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 10:09 am
I am leaving my present job and moving into a similar job but without my current bosses. (setting up own business) The new job will have lots of different stresses but I am SO much happier knowing I am not working for these very difficult people. Like happy as in I think I can stop taking anti depressants.

Is it teaching you hate? Or your work enviroment? Figure out which before you make a decision about what to do next.
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 10:27 am
[quote="amother [ Babypink ]"]I am leaving my present job and moving into a similar job but without my current bosses. (setting up own business) The new job will have lots of different stresses but I am SO much happier knowing I am not working for these very difficult people. Like happy as in I think I can stop taking anti depressants.

Is it teaching you hate? Or your work enviroment? Figure out which before you make a decision about what to do next.[/quote

That sounds wonderful! Of course every job comes with stressors. I am a therapist and while I enjoy working with my students, I do not appreciate the way I am treated by difficult parents, teachers, and other school staff. I have spent nights crying over the way I’ve been treated and it makes it difficult to parent properly.
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amother




Ginger
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 10:35 am
OP I'm in the same boat. I'm a speech therapist in a Jewish school and I hate it with a passion.I drew the line at working in public school, because the literally the only redeeming factor of my job is that I have a nice social life at work with the other therapists. Also I need the flexibility (I have a medical condition that requires Dr appointments every so often, and I need the peace of mind that I can take off whenever I want)

But I hate my actual workday. It is tortuous going through session after session, and I am bored to tears. There are mornings that I literally have a tantrum that I cannot go to work. Then I come home and have realms and realms of paperwork and have to spend hours on the phone talking to parents.

This is totally the wrong field for me but I can't afford to go back to school. When I finished seminary my parents pressured me to start college asap and get a degree in one of the therapies "because it pays sooooo much and is sooo good for a Jewish mommy." I never even thought of exploring my interests, skills or strengths. It was all about getting the degree as fast as possible. I am an introverted, organized, detail oriented person with strong math skills. Speech therapy requires being extroverted and creative which I am not.

I am not even 30 yet and I literally panic at the thought of doing this for another few decades.

Whatever sorry for the long post and didn't mean to hijack this thread...it was actually cathartic to write this all out
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byisrael




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:18 pm
[quote="amother [ OP ]"]
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
I am leaving my present job and moving into a similar job but without my current bosses. (setting up own business) The new job will have lots of different stresses but I am SO much happier knowing I am not working for these very difficult people. Like happy as in I think I can stop taking anti depressants.

Is it teaching you hate? Or your work enviroment? Figure out which before you make a decision about what to do next.[/quote

That sounds wonderful! Of course every job comes with stressors. I am a therapist and while I enjoy working with my students, I do not appreciate the way I am treated by difficult parents, teachers, and other school staff. I have spent nights crying over the way I’ve been treated and it makes it difficult to parent properly.


Is there any kind of schooling you can do to shift your work environment? Say you are a speech therapist - becoming a feeding therapist and working in a hospital.....
Also it sounds like you like the job but hate your school. Is moving into a better district a posibility? Private school - not frum necessarily?

Also consider what financial sacrifices you are willing to make in order to relieve the stress. Are you willing to live a much simpler lifestyle? Can you start making those cuts BEFORE you quit so that dh can see that it is possible to live with less. Not that he should "give you permission" just understand his lack of excitement of picking up the balance.
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amother




Cerise
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:29 pm
amother [ Ginger ] wrote:
OP I'm in the same boat. I'm a speech therapist in a Jewish school and I hate it with a passion.I drew the line at working in public school, because the literally the only redeeming factor of my job is that I have a nice social life at work with the other therapists. Also I need the flexibility (I have a medical condition that requires Dr appointments every so often, and I need the peace of mind that I can take off whenever I want)

But I hate my actual workday. It is tortuous going through session after session, and I am bored to tears. There are mornings that I literally have a tantrum that I cannot go to work. Then I come home and have realms and realms of paperwork and have to spend hours on the phone talking to parents.

This is totally the wrong field for me but I can't afford to go back to school. When I finished seminary my parents pressured me to start college asap and get a degree in one of the therapies "because it pays sooooo much and is sooo good for a Jewish mommy." I never even thought of exploring my interests, skills or strengths. It was all about getting the degree as fast as possible. I am an introverted, organized, detail oriented person with strong math skills. Speech therapy requires being extroverted and creative which I am not.

I am not even 30 yet and I literally panic at the thought of doing this for another few decades.

Whatever sorry for the long post and didn't mean to hijack this thread...it was actually cathartic to write this all out


uhmm hello are u me?
im in the same boat but im only in my cfy LOL
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singleagain




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:34 pm
Ginger, If you are introverted organized detail oriented and strong math skills why not move into billing or something like it sounds like accountant bookkeeper job would be perfect for you and you don't really necessarily need a lot of experience maybe a little bit with QuickBooks or whatever but a lot of it is on the job training I don't have nearly half as many of those things and that's what I do but you can even maybe just like what if you switched and did the billing for your services or you know for your industry

Apologies for the voice to text
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amother




Taupe
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:45 pm
amother [ Ginger ] wrote:
OP I'm in the same boat. I'm a speech therapist in a Jewish school and I hate it with a passion.I drew the line at working in public school, because the literally the only redeeming factor of my job is that I have a nice social life at work with the other therapists. Also I need the flexibility (I have a medical condition that requires Dr appointments every so often, and I need the peace of mind that I can take off whenever I want)

But I hate my actual workday. It is tortuous going through session after session, and I am bored to tears. There are mornings that I literally have a tantrum that I cannot go to work. Then I come home and have realms and realms of paperwork and have to spend hours on the phone talking to parents.

This is totally the wrong field for me but I can't afford to go back to school. When I finished seminary my parents pressured me to start college asap and get a degree in one of the therapies "because it pays sooooo much and is sooo good for a Jewish mommy." I never even thought of exploring my interests, skills or strengths. It was all about getting the degree as fast as possible. I am an introverted, organized, detail oriented person with strong math skills. Speech therapy requires being extroverted and creative which I am not.

I am not even 30 yet and I literally panic at the thought of doing this for another few decades.

Whatever sorry for the long post and didn't mean to hijack this thread...it was actually cathartic to write this all out


Oh my goodness, does anyone actually like speech therapy?! I am on the verge of switching paths because I was finding my work so unbearable. I think this degree is really touted as being terrific for a Jewish mother, but if I could go back in time I would definitely not choose this field.
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singleagain




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 1:02 pm
Don't push jobs that will be good for a Jewish mother. Get a job that you will enjoy and make it work for a Jewish mother.
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amother




Maroon
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 1:09 pm
I’m a pediatric PT and I always thought that speech therapy at the schools seemed like a cushy job!
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amother




Cerise
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 1:27 pm
amother [ Maroon ] wrote:
I’m a pediatric PT and I always thought that speech therapy at the schools seemed like a cushy job!


what does cushy mean?

I find that speech therapy in the non jewish/secular world is lauded.
all of my professors got PHDs in speech (dont get it at all lol). They were experts in the medical side of it etc. I find these women on instagram who are OBSESSED with speech weird. I dont think its a jewish concept but whatever. Its just a job and makes money. as soon as ai step out of school I dont think about it
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amother




Black
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 1:31 pm
Have you ever considered getting a job at one of the online charter schools that are so popular now in the public school realm? I work as a behavioral therapist for an online charter school and have for the last 5 years so this is not a Covid thing. I am an LCSW. While yes the paper work is the same as the public school system so that is still a massive pain and you have to learn to create an entire curriculum for online education (although you may have done that in the last year) you get to work from home and sort of set your own hours. Meaning during the chaggim I just schedule all my student calls on other days so I take off less work. There are things you have to do in person like the state testing twice a year but mostly you are home and don't have to deal with classroom management as much. Not perfect but definitely less stress then a bricks and mortar public school set up.
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amother




Maroon
 

Post Tue, Mar 23 2021, 1:34 pm
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
what does cushy mean?

I find that speech therapy in the non jewish/secular world is lauded.
all of my professors got PHDs in speech (dont get it at all lol). They were experts in the medical side of it etc. I find these women on instagram who are OBSESSED with speech weird. I dont think its a jewish concept but whatever. Its just a job and makes money. as soon as ai step out of school I dont think about it



A job that is easy, stress-free, and/or very well paid.
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