I want to write a book

amother

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 6:11 am

A Frum book about today’s real issues for adults only. A book where people have a real marriage and aren’t in a perpetual state of niddah. A book that isn’t apologetic about the real problems of our societies. Like childhood neglect, girls marrying and supporting dh in kollel because there is no other option- not necessarily because they want it, relations issues because of lack of education, having kids because that’s the thing you’re supposed to - even if you don’t want it, mental health issues ect.

But obviously no Frum publishers will except it and I don’t want to publish it in the secular press because
1. I want it to benefit the Frum crowd. It won’t be an easy read but I want it to get people in our community to really really think
2. I don’t want it to be available for the non Frum world. It won’t be geared for them.

What can I do?

amother

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 6:19 am

singleagain wrote:

First, write the book.

Second, look into self publishing. I don't know much about it. But if you don't want secular and you don't think frum would do it. That's really the only option.

But then I must self promote it? And sell it on Amazon type? A get probably also get a rav to write a haskamah I’m imagining?

Hmmm that might work.

sequoia

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 6:21 am

Nothing.

You’re right, no frum publisher will accept it.

I’ve thought of writing a similar book myself and came to the same conclusions you did. A frum
publisher only wants stories of perfect lives. The problems that are allowed to be mentioned are infertility and not finding a shidduch. That’s it.

The secular press wants juicy prurient details ala Unorthodox.

Not going to happen, either way.

singleagain

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 6:22 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

But then I must self promote it? And sell it on Amazon type? A get probably also get a rav to write a haskamah I’m imagining?

Hmmm that might work.

Yes you would prob have to self promote. But there's here on imamother, Facebook, instagram, besides for Amazon etc. You could prob get ppl to post flyers for free. Might be able to sell in stores, if you sell on consignment. Or take full returns.

I know it'll prob cost money, but this is exactly the kind of thing go fund me was started for.

amother

Saddlebrown

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 6:56 am

OP, I understand completely. I too have a book series that I don't know if I will ever write because I don't know who would publish it (other than Amazon) and how I would keep it mostly to the Frum crowd.

After struggling through low libido due to bf'ing, pregnancy, pills, post partum complications (PPD, etc), I just want more kosher ways to get me into the mood. The only options are harlequins, Bridgerton, e-rotic fiction... Just want some more frum romances to get me into the mood, something that I'd feel less "grub" about if that makes sense. Romances that highlight kosher relationships (married) realistically (e.g. mikvah night). Arousing but not too too explicit.

In an ideal world, it would be for adult Frum women only. The goal would be to help other women like myself by turning something that is usually associated with unholiness into something for holiness (helping one's libido to be with a spouse). But even with those good intentions, no Frum publisher would touch it. Not sure who would endorse it (perhaps R' Shmuly Boteach?).

And where does one find a beta reader or editor for this kind of thing?! I would write under a pen name so asking on FB is out of the question....

So, like you, I feel stuck. Funny, I was thinking about this same problem in the middle of the night last night.

amother

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 9:11 am

amother [ Saddlebrown ] wrote:

Actually I’m thinking of an idea as I’m reading your post... how about we create a website that sells books for Frum adults only. Maybe we can even get our own editor as well. As far as the haskamah we have to really work hard for one. There is definitely a need.

amother

Chartreuse

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 9:19 am

Once a book is published, you have no control over who reads it.

I doubt there are enough women on this site to justify publishing a book. There is a large list of members, but many different tastes in literature.

How are you planning on ensuring a level of quality literature for an affordable price? There's no value to bringing up important issues if it is done in a way that will bore people, or if it is too expensive for anyone to buy.

You have the issues you want to address, but do you have a plot? Do you know the characters, and their individual (not stereotyped) reactions to the challenges they are faced with?

PinkFridge

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 9:27 am

I've heard that even more conventional frum authors need to do a lot of self-promoting.

I don't know how out there you can get. There's a new book from IIRC an imprint of Menucha called Pride and Preference (an iteration of Pride and Prejudice) that I think was first serialized in The Jewish Press.

But the types of issues you want to talk about about extremely delicate, e.g. niddah and - hate to bring up the tz word - but tznius is an issue. If you have to talk about something delicate and it's important e.g sx therapy, it can be done. If it's important and l'toeles. Does your book qualify?

amother

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 2:25 pm

amother [ Chartreuse ] wrote:

I won’t be relying on this site. I’ll promote though social media as well.

Of course I have a plot.

amother

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 2:28 pm

PinkFridge wrote:

The basic plot is that a girl who was raised in a dysfunctional home gets married to a kollel boy against her will- because that’s what’s done. She crashes, almost loses her marriage and life and slowly works through it and heals.

I don’t think I can adequately write about her struggles without being open about topics of young marriage, relations, birth control and kollel life in general.

amother

Honeydew

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 4:18 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I can identify

Simple1

Sun, Apr 11 2021, 5:18 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I don't think the first paragraph is taboo nowadays. Many books are like that. Well I guess as long as you're not outright condemning the kollel lifestyle instead of just condemning the dysfunction.