What is a basic nice shabbos for when you have a guest

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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Shabbos, Rosh Chodesh, Fast Days, and other Days of Note

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amother

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:20 am

I am married almost 20 years however I don't really like cooking. I work full time and have a 5 kids and I am generally overwhelmed and thus never ever have company. This week we are having a relatives for shabbos who I love dearly. However, I am completely overwhelmed at the thought of having to have an actual nice formal shabbos. My regular shabbos is:
Night:
challa (bought) salmon, soup and chicken from soup, dips and cake (bought).

Lunch:
Big cholent with kishka, cold cuts

Shalosh seudos:
fruit, eggs, tuna

I know this is very bare bones but this is what works for us. I almost never do more. Once in 6 months I'd make a potato or apple kugel. But really that is all.

My question is:
a. Am I totally dysfunctional? Are other people like me?
b. What can I add in for the guest that is super easy but just makes it a "normal" meal. The wife is super woman and they've come to my house in the past. They're happy to come but I would love to make them feel really welcomed and taken care of.

Help!

amother

Lilac

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:25 am

If you’re family is happy and satisfied then that’s all you need.
We don’t go past soup in our house cuz no one eats it. Maybe as the kids get older I’ll have to make a main and side.

So make a a pan of baked chicken.
Can make 1 kugel. Can make a fresh salad (bag of lettuce, cherry tomatoes, cut pepper and cucumber add a store bought dressing).

For lunch. Serve fish as well. Make the salad again. Chulent is enough.

Bought challah, dips and dessert are pretty normal.

You don’t need 100 options.

imasinger

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:26 am

Please please please don't change from your routine!

If you want to make them welcome, you can put some water bottles in their guest room room, be sure it has hangers, etc, and have your kids make a sign for the door.

They would much rather have you relaxed and enjoying the visit, and have a simple Shabbos, than have you exhausted by trying to be fancy in order to help them feel more welcome.

You can always look for prepared things to buy and add if desired.

elisheva25

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:27 am

Hi,
Ure not dysfunctional, every family has to do what works for them... also whats the point of making food your kids don’t eat ?
You do what works
But I think just to add a drop would be helpful
Fri night
Add any main course & side that’s easy for you
Ex#1 Flanken baked in oven & rice in rice cooker
Ex#2 Some type of chicken & potato dish
For Shabbos day
Add
1. Some type of kugel
2. Basic green salad.... can be checked greens w/Ceasar dressing
For Shalosh seudos
Add
Israeli salad
If you still feel like you might be upto it & have energy ... bake some
Sort of an easy dessert that you can serve after both meals
Done !

amother

Magenta

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:28 am

Guests come for the company, not the food. I would probably add green salad to each meal, and a side of rice and/or roast veggies. But really, just enjoy your company!

singleagain

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:34 am

Why not ask your guest if there's anything special they would like? Bonus if it's something they can bring, like a store bought kugel or a salad or dessert

amother

cornflower

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 8:50 am

I'd add a variety of dips & salad for both meal. Main course for Friday night, fish for shabbos day as well.

amother

Aquamarine

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:00 am

Its up to you what you would rather: do a little more to be "comfortable" having guests or stick with your routine to stay in your comfort zone.

Either way here are some easy shabbos foods I make regularly :
Friday night:
Roasted potatoes
Oven baked rice with mushrooms
String beans (frozen bag, add garlic powder and soy sauce)

Shabbos day:
Lettuce salad (make it on the spot, no prep before)
Add raw eggs to my cholent and have mashed eggs at the seuda (also make immediately before)
Plate of pickles/olives

For shalosh seudos, I do very, very minimal but you could always cut up fruit and vegetables. Make an easy dip (guacamole or salsa/mayo).

Just ideas! You don't need to do any of this!

amother

Ecru

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:08 am

Do what works for you!
I put chulent pastramy into my chulent for Friday night because my kids looove it!
Otherwise it’s similar to what you do.
Takes so quick to prepare while I used to slave for hours and no one knows the difference.

amother

Oak

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:13 am

I would buy more. Potato kugel, bagged salads, ice cream.
Can you put a pan of chicken in the oven for fri night meal? I think that would make a difference. Simple like mrs dash spice or bbq sauce.

Raisin

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:21 am

definitely a main dish like roast chicken, but for the fish course you can serve lox or ready made gefilta fish and buy some dips. You could also buy a kugel or make an easy rice dish.

mizle10

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:26 am

Honestly... I’m not a fish person and chicken from the soup is just very unappealing. I would be hungry if that’s what I was served.
Yes guests come for the company and not the food but I would rather be full without the company than hungry.
I would add to your menu, if cooking is to overwhelming bought food is perfectly fine.

heidi

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:29 am

Definitely add a main dish Friday night. You can do one pan chicken and rice or chicken and potatoes. Add a salad or veggies (it can be frozen brocolli or string beans baked with some olive oil and kosher salt)

cbg

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 9:58 am

It’s fine
but if you really want to add something
Night:
Add a brisket super easy and no fail
Some easy simple rice
And a green bagged salad
Day:
Again a big green bagged salad
You can add cherry tomato, sliced heart of Palm, black sliced olives, baby corn, chips all are things that are dump and go with super minimal prep, and bottle dressing

Brisket recipe:
Preheat oven at 350
2nd cut brisket
1 can cranberry sauce, any
1 pkg onion soup mix
Mix and pour on top of brisket
Foil tightly
Bake 30 min per lb (or 45min if serving whole)
Refrigerate overnight
Before Shabbat slice and heat on blech
Until ready to serve
Or you serve it whole which is easier and add the baking time

Baby Spinach salad is another dump and go salad
1 bag baby spinach (pre-checked)
1 can manderine orange
1 bottle honey mustard dressing
Plate spinach on a large serving platter
Place manderine segments on top
Drizzle honey mustard on top
Put more honey mustard dressing seperate on the table

Heart of Palm dump salad
1 can heart of Palm sliced
1 can black olives sliced
1 can corn
1TBSP Mayo
Salt and pepper to taste.

Beets
1 can sliced beets
Cumin to taste
Salt to taste
Tehina in a squeeze bottle
Plate sliced beets sprinkle cumin and salt
Drizzle Tehina

Chickpea salad requires a little more prep or buy veggies pre sliced
1 can chickpea drained
Radish sliced in the food processor or buy sliced
3 colored peppers slice or buy pre sliced
Minced garlic in a jar
Olive oil and salt
Dump, mix, serve

There are yummy soups that come in a carton some with while clean ingredients.
Take advantage of pre- cut and checked veggies at the store.

I think what you need is some (what I call) dump recipes.

Things like kugel and homemade soup take a long time to prep

zaq

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 1:16 pm

1.Family comes to see you, not to judge your culinary abilities.
2. Do what you always do. Your meal plan sounds totally adequate. For purposes of good nutrition, I'd suggest adding a simple salad of cut-up veggies as well as some fruit, either as dessert, as a first course, or on the table for people to snack on. It makes no difference whether the dishes are homemade or store-bought. See Item #1.

amother

Brunette

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 1:21 pm

To add to the other posters ideas, I would make extra salmon and use it over a lettuce salad for Shabbos lunch. Just gives everyone a little more protein than cholent.

amother

cornflower

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 1:21 pm

zaq wrote:

Yes, family comes to see you. But when you're having guests for the entire shabbos, you need to serve adequate appetizing meals so guests shouldn't go hungry. If that's too hard for someone, they shouldn't invite guests. Chicken from the soup is not something most people would serve to guests. It's no big deal to put some meat and side dish in the oven.

amother

Jade

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 1:27 pm

To answer the questions in the OP:

a. You are not dysfunctional and there are plenty of people like you. You are taking care of your family and keeping them happy and fed!

b. If the wife is superwomen as you described, I would add some easy extras. It's easy to say that you shouldn't care, but I know I would and there is nothing wrong with upping the standard a drop for a special Shabbos with guests. For Friday night, the only thing missing is a main. Put some bone-in chicken in a pan, cover with duck sauce, and bake uncovered at 350 for about 1.5 hours. Then either buy potato kugel to serve with it or make some rice from a boxed mix. Easy and delicious! For Shabbos day, all you need to add is a fresh lettuce salad and it's a complete meal. If you don't have dessert planned for the day meal, get some parve ice cream.

Enjoy your company!

amother

Salmon

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 2:39 pm

That’s what I usually serve, op, minus the fish and kishke. It works well for my family. For your company I suggest buying grilled chicken breasts for Friday night, making rice pilaf from a box, and making Israeli salad. For the day seudah I would add a salad and more of the bought grilled chicken breasts.

watergirl

Mon, Apr 12 2021, 2:44 pm

a. Am I totally dysfunctional? Are other people like me?

You are normal! You do what works for your family and that's great! If they are happy, enjoy.

b. What can I add in for the guest that is super easy but just makes it a "normal" meal. The wife is super woman and they've come to my house in the past. They're happy to come but I would love to make them feel really welcomed and taken care of.

For guests, you should consider making more. If you would like some examples of "dump and put" chicken, let us know and we won't let you down! Literally dump the chicken in a pan, dump sauce on it (from a bottle) and put it in the chicken. Takes longer to type it out than to do it. For lunch, add a salad and done. No, you can not please everyone, but you can try to make a main course for shabbos dinner, add a prepared kugel from the store, and add a salad for lunch.

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