Help! Buffet for 150!

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 3:54 pm

DVOM wrote:

I can assure you that my husband will not mind manning the plunger if need be (just texted him, because I got curious. I asked: "What will we do if the toilets get plugged up during the bar mitzvah??" His answer: "I'll plunge it." My response: "IN YOUR NEW SUIT????" His answer: "Yup. Leave the toilets to me, girl." Do I know my man well, or what?). But our plumbing is in good working order, and we do not generally have toilet malfunctions. I'm hopeful that the toilets will continue to function well during the party.

I find your assumption that my family and friends will mistreat the wait staff very very sad. I believe your drawing on your own experiences, which makes me even sadder.

I am drawing on my experiences with my family and friends. In the many social situations I've been in, I have not seen my friends and family act in the way you're describing to anyone-- not wait staff, nurses, mailmen, garbage collectors, store clerks, gas pumpers, cleaning help. I don't know if I could stay friends with people who were comfortable telling other people 'what they think of them,' as you say. I'm very confident that my guests will behave in a kind, polite, and considerate way, even if they need a water pitcher refilled, or a new napkin, or a refill at the buffet table.

Seems your have a lot of things planned and solved already! Good.
I am convinced your guests are will behaved and kind of there are enough waiters. The buffet must be watched carefully so that things are not missing.
The problem starts when there aren't enough of waiters who can respond to your guests request's. If they have to wait for that napkins 15 minutes or repeatedly have to ask for something you bet even a kind person will not be so kind. Take into consideration your yard is L shaped. Will the waiters be able to have full control of it?
Please consider to rent a manager who will be the head of responsibility. You only get one time to do this event.
The ice cream truck will be a huge hit make sure you have plenty.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 3:57 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Seems your have a lot of things planned and solved already! Good.
I am convinced your guests are will behaved and kind IF there are enough waiters. The buffet must be watched carefully so that things are not missing.
The problem starts when there aren't enough of waiters who can respond to your guests request's. If they have to wait for that napkins 15 minutes or repeatedly have to ask for something you bet even a kind person will not be so kind. Take into consideration your yard is L shaped. Will the waiters be able to have full control of it?
Please consider to rent a manager who will be the head of responsibility. You only get one time to do this event.
The ice cream truck will be a huge hit make sure you have plenty.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 4:26 pm

Fave wrote:

DVOM, I think that the the naysayers don’t understand what type of guest you’ll be having at the event. They are picturing formal guests that expect a 5 star high class experience.

You seem to have a real helpful group of family and friends who are all ready to pitch in together to make this party work. Enjoy!

The "naysayers" are picturing the event based on experience in the past. I certainly didn't work I a 5 star function hall.

amother

Jetblack

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 4:42 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

I think these events are different when you're the caterer hosting for strangers vs. the ba'al simcha hosting family and friends. I've attended such self-catered events where everyone present is either a close relative or friend, and most of them have been part of the planning and preparations and setup. At such events, if I wanted a napkin, I would probably know where the bag of napkins is in the house to go and get one for myself, and to replenish the piles on the table too! It's different -- there's a sense of community at these events.

DVOM

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 4:49 pm

sky wrote:

Sounds wonderful.
I think seating for 140 when inviting 150 is fine. Especially bec in Lakewood ppl come and go constantly. You could rent a few extra chairs off on the side just in case.

I know renting tables and chairs is probably an expense you didn’t want. But on the positive side you don’t have to shlep and return and clean them. It’s a huge headache off your head.

It actually ended up being pretty inexpensive. Definitely worth the cost, so thanks imas!!

4g01o

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 5:01 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Her guests sound like mostly family and friends, I'm sure they won't be demanding more food! If they see there is a need for something they'll get up and help. I really think it will work iyh. Her guests aren't paying for their food, it's not a business meeting! It'll be a lot of work but fun and op will feel so accomplished iyh. Even if something little goes wrong, it's all friends and family who I'm sure can overlook some mishaps.

amother

Floralwhite

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 5:07 pm

Sounds amazing DVOM! You really have this well planned out.
My biggest concern is the bathrooms. Some people have medical issues and can’t wait.
A bathroom is a necessity not a luxury.
Please please have porta potties!!!
Nobody likes them but if people need them, they will appreciate them.

Also, if you could find a way to make sure serving pieces stay separate (re pareve/milchig and re allergies) to avoid cross contamination that would be great.

Sounds yum!

amother

Crimson

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 5:31 pm

Fab4 wrote:

This, and not everyone needs the bathroom on an evening out, and not all at once.

An actual restroom with stalls or single toilet bathroom? At a multi generation event with probably elderly people and little kids? Not to mention pre teen boys known for overeating or mixing interesting concoctions that may not agree with them? I think it's very short sighted to plan for 3 toilets to that many guests.

amother

Mistyrose

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 6:00 pm

My family and I ate at Andrea’s Niagara restaurant a couple of times so I know exactly what she’s talking about. For whatever reason, there were a lot of loud, pushy, inconsiderate people coming through Niagara both times we were there. My family is from OOT so we just kind of sat back and enjoyed the show, but in a semi-shocked way. 😳

DVOM, I fully believe your family will be mentchlich and lovely. Having said that, though, I just want to say that my mom made two backyard simchas and said NEVER AGAIN. Way too much work. She felt like she didn't get to enjoy her own simchas. (And they were beautiful simchas.) When I made my first bar mitzvah I realized that if I had been running around doing everything I wouldn’t have gotten to daven the way I wanted to. It’s a very emotional day. I was able to sit with my Tehillim and pour my heart out to the Ribono shel Olam and just focus on what really mattered. I was grateful that I had the time and the headspace to be able to thank Hashem for everything and to beg him for all the things that we want for my precious son. I was able to cry and daven with a full heart, completely focused on the tefillos. Just something to consider. Mazel tov and lots of nachas!

familyfirst

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 6:08 pm

Op- no doubt you could do this. The details sound taken care of.

The question is whether that’s the way you want to spend your time at your simcha. This isn’t Stam a party. It’s a bar mitzva. You want to kvell and process and enjoy the nachas. Not running around getting cutlery.
But..: it can be done. Logistics look workable. Question is the emotional part. Can you do this and truly be present and in bar mitzva mode?

amother

Azure

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 6:41 pm

Op, your event sounds like it will be really nice and a ton of fun! A warm affair with family and friends who want to share it with you. Looking forward to hearing how beautifully it went!
As far a bathrooms, maybe ask some of your close guests, personally I would rather wait than use a porta-potty. They're just gross! For me they're a turn off and would detract. And if a kid needs the bathroom urgently, most decent people who your family and friends are will understand and let them go ahead. Many halls that accomodate this size crowd don't necessarily have more bathrooms.... If cleanliness is a concern then see if your cleaning lady will come and clean them in the middle of the event.
Mazal tov and enjoy every moment! It passes so quickly!