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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
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amother
OP
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 Thu, May 27 2021, 7:10 am
My 4 year old son is in kindergarten. He came hime upset yesterday and told me the teacher gave everyone ices besides him since he wouldn't sing loud by graduation practice. Its not the first time ahe didnt give him something when everyone else got. My son doesn't like to be in the spotlight.
Another time she didnt give him a birthday cupcake a boy brought in since he wouldn't say a Brocha out loud to the boy. The English teacher realized and had him tell her a brocha in her ear and she told the boy.
I am really upset I feel she shouldn't single him out and not give him. She is also the principal....
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imasinger
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Thu, May 27 2021, 7:12 am
Schedule a conference.
Tell her about what the English teacher did, and how it worked.
You can show her current research that pressuring shy children is unproductive and damaging, and suggest alternatives.
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Rabbit613
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Thu, May 27 2021, 7:14 am
That's horrible. Your poor child!
I don't think that's the proper way to encourage him to be louder. You need to talk to the teacher about it.
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amother
Pearl
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Thu, May 27 2021, 7:23 am
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pick up the phone and call her - or leave a message at the school for her to call you. Then say to her, my son came home upset and told me that all the kids received ices but he didn't receive them because he wasn't singing loudly. It's important to say what the child told her as opposed to just accusing and confronting her. She will see you are being respectful to her. The say something like, I'm sure you understand that a child who is shy doesn't deserve to be punished... Hopefully she will apologize or she may give you a completely different story. Either way first give her a chance before taking it up with the principal. When she sees that you will call/confront her she will learn very quickly not to punish your child for being shy.
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amother
OP
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Thu, May 27 2021, 7:53 am
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Thanks everyone. I am going to speak to her today when I take him.
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amother
Papaya
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Thu, May 27 2021, 8:17 am
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This happened to me A TON as a kid! I would call up and talk to the teacher right away. It is a totally unreasonable thing to "punish" a kid for.
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amother
Lilac
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Thu, May 27 2021, 9:08 am
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My MIL used to do this all the time. Single out the one child who wouldn't comply and then not give her the treat she gave all the others. We hate her.
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