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I'm the worst mother. 3yo cursing.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:36 am
Zehava wrote:
Oh really
Anyone care to chime in here?
you’re making a lot of assumptions here that don’t make any sense. Do you consider this to be an intelligent response to the debate?
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Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:39 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
you’re making a lot of assumptions here that don’t make any sense. Do you consider this to be an intelligent response to the debate?

There really is no intelligent response to someone who confidently asserts that a 12 month old baby needs to be punished for crying and throwing food. I just don’t know what to say. I’m just thrown that someone can even think this way. Really I don’t know what to say I’m just so sad for that poor baby who never actually gets to be a baby.
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amother
Nemesia


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:40 am
amother [ Lemon ] wrote:
What's abusive to put a child in a playpen with toys just to remove them from a misbehavior like throwing food or crying?


How does that remove them from crying???

And as another poster said, both of those behaviors are developmentally appropriate.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:42 am
Zehava wrote:
There are no age-appropriate consequences for a baby.
And there is no use arguing with someone who clearly has no clue about brain development.
what’s with all the assumption here? What would you say if I told you that I have studied child development extensively? And what may I ask are your credentials? Anyone who is that his childhood development would know that there are multiple schools of thought and that time out is actually one of the effective methods for children ages 12 months and above. Besides, you were yelling abuse at the mom who discussed this method for her two year old. A two year old is not a baby. Have a wonderful day.
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nchr




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:45 am
I could have written alot of this 8 months ago. Give yourselves some space and oxygen and you'll see that time outs aren't necessary.

I wouldn't ignore a child who hits because if they are verbal I'd rather try to figure out what they really need (a hug, food, a drink, space) and give them another outlet (a pillow, etc.)
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Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:45 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
what’s with all the assumption here? What would you say if I told you that I have studied child development extensively? And what may I ask are your credentials? Anyone who is that his childhood development would know that there are multiple schools of thought and that time out is actually one of the effective methods for children ages 12 months and above. Besides, you were yelling abuse at the mom who discussed this method for her two year old. A two year old is not a baby. Have a wonderful day.

I would say that anything you studied is probably from the age of dr Spock. And that so-called credentials doesn’t excuse abuse.
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amother
Whitesmoke


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:47 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
of course there is misbehavior at 12 months. A 12 month old is old enough to understand when your mother tells him or her “no”. If a particular offense is repeated multiple times then yes it is miss behavior ans a minor age appropriate consequence will have a great chance of success.


A 12 month old has no impulse control, can't think through multi-step consequences, and is just starting to get the hang of the most basic elements of cause and effect. (That's why babies love those toys with you push a button and it makes a noise.)

Maybe it's possible to condition them but that sounds cruel. Ouch reading this thread I want to scoop up those cute little babies and cuddle them.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:47 am
Zehava wrote:
There really is no intelligent response to someone who confidently asserts that a 12 month old baby needs to be punished for crying and throwing food. I just don’t know what to say. I’m just thrown that someone can even think this way. Really I don’t know what to say I’m just so sad for that poor baby who never actually gets to be a baby.
again with the assumptions! Where did I say that a 12 month old should be punished for crying or throwing food! You are literally manipulating my responses by culling together responses from various posters and assigning it to me! All I have said is that age appropriate consequences for certain behaviors after being warned multiple times are not abuse. I did not say that consequences are warranted for crying. I also said that a three year old is old enough for a consequence such as not giving them a Shabbos treat if they curse after being told by non that this is not ok multiple times.
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amother
Impatiens


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:48 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
what’s with all the assumption here? What would you say if I told you that I have studied child development extensively? And what may I ask are your credentials? Anyone who is that his childhood development would know that there are multiple schools of thought and that time out is actually one of the effective methods for children ages 12 months and above. Besides, you were yelling abuse at the mom who discussed this method for her two year old. A two year old is not a baby. Have a wonderful day.


I am a licensed and certified Childhood Development Specialist.

And I can tell you that punishing a small baby for age-appropriate behavior is cruel and abusive.

There aren’t multiple schools of thought for punishing a baby. The only school of thought is that such behavior warrants a visit from the CPS.
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amother
Nemesia


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:48 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
again with the assumptions! Where did I say that a 12 month old should be punished for crying or throwing food! You are literally manipulating my responses by culling together responses from various posters and assigning it to me! All I have said is that age appropriate consequences for certain behaviors after being warned multiple times are not abuse. I did not say that consequences are warranted for crying. I also said that a three year old is old enough for a consequence such as not giving them a Shabbos treat if they curse after being told by non that this is not ok multiple times.


You joined an existing conversation. The conversation was about 12 months olds. It had veered off the original topic of 3 year olds.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:48 am
Zehava wrote:
I would say that anything you studied is probably from the age of dr Spock. And that so-called credentials doesn’t excuse abuse.
when will you learn that bashing is not a debate technique. You are literally using out downs to argue your points? Very mature
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:51 am
amother [ Impatiens ] wrote:
I am a licensed and certified Childhood Development Specialist.

And I can tell you that punishing a small baby for age-appropriate behavior is cruel and abusive.

There aren’t multiple schools of thought for punishing a baby. The only school of thought is that such behavior warrants a visit from the CPS.
I am not talking about age appropriate behavior. I am talking about when a small child engages in certain activities that are deemed red light behaviors. Excessive cursing or engaging in dangerous behavior is not age appropriate and should be treated with minor consequences. I did not say punishment. You are twisting my words to make me out to be a monster but anyone who says that a three your old child can’t be given a minor consequence for a repeated offense should not be practicing
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amother
Nemesia


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:52 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
I am not talking about age appropriate behavior. I am talking about when a small child engages in certain activities that are deemed red light behaviors. Excessive cursing or engaging in dangerous behavior is not age appropriate and should be treated with minor consequences. I did not say punishment. You are twisting my words to make me out to be a monster but anyone who says that a three your old child can’t be given a minor consequence for a repeated offense should not be practicing


Again, you joined an existing conversation. The conversation we are having is about 12 months olds.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:53 am
amother [ Nemesia ] wrote:
You joined an existing conversation. The conversation was about 12 months olds. It had veered off the original topic of 3 year olds.
I believe one mom mentioned 12 month olds. The rest of the conversation was about three and two-year-olds. Also if you’re responding to my response then don’t source information from someone else’s response. That’s just manipulating the situation to your benefit.
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nchr




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:54 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
I believe one mom mentioned 12 month olds. The rest of the conversation was about three and two-year-olds. Also if you’re responding to my response then don’t source information from someone else’s response. That’s just manipulating the situation to your benefit.


You did write the following. My pediatrician also told me this before but I now know doctors aren't chinuch experts. Although I don't know if it qualifies as abuse.

amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
Anyone who is that his childhood development would know that there are multiple schools of thought and that time out is actually one of the effective methods for children ages 12 months and above
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amother
Nemesia


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 11:56 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
I believe one mom mentioned 12 month olds. The rest of the conversation was about three and two-year-olds. Also if you’re responding to my response then don’t source information from someone else’s response. That’s just manipulating the situation to your benefit.


I didn't source information from anyone else's response. I was responding directly to you from me.

Yes, one mom mentioned 12 month olds and then that became the topic of discussion in the thread. For obvious reasons.
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rubyred




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 12:02 pm
I think some disagree about what a baby is and when a child can learn from a consequence. The answer to this is that each child is different. There are 4 year olds that still act like a baby and don’t understand.
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amother
Amaryllis


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 12:03 pm
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
of course there is misbehavior at 12 months. A 12 month old is old enough to understand when your mother tells him or her “no”. If a particular offense is repeated multiple times then yes it is miss behavior ans a minor age appropriate consequence will have a great chance of success.


A 12 month old is old enough to understand no.

What has the world come to.

A 12 month old is a baby.


Last edited by amother on Tue, Dec 21 2021, 8:58 am; edited 1 time in total
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rubyred




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 12:03 pm
amother [ Nemesia ] wrote:
I didn't source information from anyone else's response. I was responding directly to you from me.

Yes, one mom mentioned 12 month olds and then that became the topic of discussion in the thread. For obvious reasons.


There was someone who mentioned putting a 12 month old in time out. And someone else mentioned their 12 month old gets put into time out for throwing food and crying. I and ecru do not agree with this because this is age appropriate behavior.
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amother
Amaryllis


 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 12:04 pm
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
what’s with all the assumption here? What would you say if I told you that I have studied child development extensively? And what may I ask are your credentials? Anyone who is that his childhood development would know that there are multiple schools of thought and that time out is actually one of the effective methods for children ages 12 months and above. Besides, you were yelling abuse at the mom who discussed this method for her two year old. A two year old is not a baby. Have a wonderful day.


Why is a 2 year old not a baby?


Last edited by amother on Tue, Dec 21 2021, 8:57 am; edited 1 time in total
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