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Elfrida




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:39 pm
Ema of 4 wrote:
And then what? Hope that makes them uncomfortable enough to stop?


It's pointing out that their actions are not going unnoticed, and that you are taking action to defend your rights if necessary.

You have to be prepared to follow through if necessary, or they will just be laughing at empty threats.
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amother




OP
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:40 pm
amother [ Jasmine ] wrote:
This behavior is terrible. Heads up, OP, I’d be prepared to need to fight to get security deposit back and anything else you might be expecting.


Yeah, I'm assuming at this point I'm not getting my security deposit back. Which stinks, but I'm not going to fight it. Small price to pay to put this behind me. But I do need to get through the next 3 weeks...
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tichellady




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:42 pm
Did you pay last months rent?
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amother




Jade
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:42 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Yeah, I'm assuming at this point I'm not getting my security deposit back. Which stinks, but I'm not going to fight it. Small price to pay to put this behind me. But I do need to get through the next 3 weeks...


You weren’t supposed to pay the last months rent... they were supposed to use your security for that
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amother




OP
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:50 pm
amother [ Jade ] wrote:
You weren’t supposed to pay the last months rent... they were supposed to use your security for that
not how it works where I'm from. You pay first, last, and security at the time that you sign. The purpose of security is that they're supposed to use for any damage they need to fix after you leave, though many landlords find very dubious reasons to keep it, as I'm sure this one will.
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vintagebknyc




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:53 pm
OP, if you document everything, including taking pictures of the way you left the property, you can take the landlord to small claims court for the last month's rent if they refuse to give it back.
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amother




Seashell
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 5:55 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
not how it works where I'm from. You pay first, last, and security at the time that you sign. The purpose of security is that they're supposed to use for any damage they need to fix after you leave, though many landlords find very dubious reasons to keep it, as I'm sure this one will.
Maybe don't clean and they can use the deposit to hire a cleaning crew. Might as well save yourself the work.
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amother




Crimson
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 6:30 pm
So maybe it's because I am at a stage in life where I don't put up with nonsense anymore but I'd invest the $6 to hang a sign like this on my front door. https://www.amazon.com/Trespas.....r=8-4
Then I'd sit back and watch them slowly back away from your door. If they keep coming by and bothering you, there's no law that says you need to engage with stupid. Just. Dont. Answer. The. Door.

It's three weeks till you never have to deal with this again. Just remember to breathe and then whack a wall on your way out with a big box. Oops.
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amother




IndianRed
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 6:40 pm
Hi op, I’m just reading this now. I want to tell u that I’ve lived thru similar. And there is nothing quite like having the home ur living shared with people who hate ur guts and wish ill on u. It’s a sickening feeling. I couldn’t walk out of my house with menuchas hanfesh when I was going thru it. I wish u lots of chizzuk and the proper attitude to get thru this!
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amother




Almond
 

Post Mon, Jul 05 2021, 9:49 pm
This is similar to what happened to my sweet dil. She understood the next Tennant was in a dilemma where to store stuff so she cleared out a large closet for him. She let him come numerous times to measure and check out things. She was so easy and accommodating. The new Tennant thanked her profusely. Everyone was happy and shalom al Yisrael. She felt so good to be a helpful and pleasant person.

Can OP be more easygoing?
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ora_43




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 2:55 am
amother [ Almond ] wrote:
This is similar to what happened to my sweet dil. She understood the next Tennant was in a dilemma where to store stuff so she cleared out a large closet for him. She let him come numerous times to measure and check out things. She was so easy and accommodating. The new Tennant thanked her profusely. Everyone was happy and shalom al Yisrael. She felt so good to be a helpful and pleasant person.

Can OP be more easygoing?

OP was easygoing. She let the new tenants in multiple times. She agreed to move out a few days early. If they were going to be grateful, they'd be at that point already.

At this point OP already sees that the new tenants are boundary-crossing weirdos who deliberately make her uncomfortable in her own home. So trying to be helpful in a way that gives them more access to her home is not a good idea. Just imagine how they'd be acting if they had an excuse to actually walk into the house - 'my property is in your closet, you have to let me in.'

Don't give them an inch, OP. The clearer the line, the easier it is to make them stay on their side of it.
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imaima




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 3:40 am
amother [ Almond ] wrote:
This is similar to what happened to my sweet dil. She understood the next Tennant was in a dilemma where to store stuff so she cleared out a large closet for him. She let him come numerous times to measure and check out things. She was so easy and accommodating. The new Tennant thanked her profusely. Everyone was happy and shalom al Yisrael. She felt so good to be a helpful and pleasant person.

Can OP be more easygoing?


I hope your DIL didn't inconvenience herself too much for them.

Some people's life ia so hectic that they can't handle being there for strangers all that much.
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amother




IndianRed
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 9:19 am
amother [ Almond ] wrote:
This is similar to what happened to my sweet dil. She understood the next Tennant was in a dilemma where to store stuff so she cleared out a large closet for him. She let him come numerous times to measure and check out things. She was so easy and accommodating. The new Tennant thanked her profusely. Everyone was happy and shalom al Yisrael. She felt so good to be a helpful and pleasant person.

Can OP be more easygoing?


There is something passive aggressive about this comment. sorry
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causemommysaid




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 9:31 am
You aren't going to see a penny of the security deposit.

Maybe tell the landlord you will take a hammer to a wall or take the fridge with you if he doesn't give it back. I'm only half kidding....
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watergirl




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 9:34 am
causemommysaid wrote:
You aren't going to see a penny of the security deposit.

Maybe tell the landlord you will take a hammer to a wall or take the fridge with you if he doesn't give it back. I'm only half kidding....

The landlord has to provide an itemized list of repairs and cost in order to keep any of the deposit. Most don’t do it but you can push back (I have) and have been able to get more of my deposit back when they see I know the law.
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DrMom




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 9:40 am
amother [ IndianRed ] wrote:
There is something passive aggressive about this comment. sorry

In what way is that comment passive-aggressive??
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 11:06 am
amother [ Almond ] wrote:
This is similar to what happened to my sweet dil. She understood the next Tennant was in a dilemma where to store stuff so she cleared out a large closet for him. She let him come numerous times to measure and check out things. She was so easy and accommodating. The new Tennant thanked her profusely. Everyone was happy and shalom al Yisrael. She felt so good to be a helpful and pleasant person.

Can OP be more easygoing?


Sorry, but I've been plenty easygoing. I have no problem letting them walk through as many times as they wanted, even during dinner/bedtime to measure rooms, or take notes on this or that they wanted to do when they move in. But I am still living here which means my things are still living here. I can't clear out a shed or a closet, then where will my things go? Not to mention I don't want it on my head if the day the movers come, we accidentally take stuff that isn't ours. Sorry, but this isn't their place to do what they want until August 1st. Actually, by July 28th they should be able to start moving things in if they really need to, because we'll have completely vacated by then.

Anyway, so far so good today. Haven't heard from or seen anybody. I'm still on edge but we'll see how the next few days go.
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amother




Almond
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 1:28 pm
amother [ IndianRed ] wrote:
There is something passive aggressive about this comment. sorry


That is a wise observation. I guess that's how I deal with adversity.
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amother




Seashell
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 2:34 pm
ora_43 wrote:
OP was easygoing. She let the new tenants in multiple times. She agreed to move out a few days early. If they were going to be grateful, they'd be at that point already.

At this point OP already sees that the new tenants are boundary-crossing weirdos who deliberately make her uncomfortable in her own home. So trying to be helpful in a way that gives them more access to her home is not a good idea. Just imagine how they'd be acting if they had an excuse to actually walk into the house - 'my property is in your closet, you have to let me in.'

Don't give them an inch, OP. The clearer the line, the easier it is to make them stay on their side of it.
OP's story reminds me of the mashal about the yetzer Hara. The one where the guy sells the nudnik a single nail in his house and the nudnik hangs a picture from the nail, then brings all his family and friends to see the picture, and by the end of the story has forced the guy out of the house.
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amother




Seashell
 

Post Tue, Jul 06 2021, 2:36 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Sorry, but I've been plenty easygoing. I have no problem letting them walk through as many times as they wanted, even during dinner/bedtime to measure rooms, or take notes on this or that they wanted to do when they move in. But I am still living here which means my things are still living here. I can't clear out a shed or a closet, then where will my things go? Not to mention I don't want it on my head if the day the movers come, we accidentally take stuff that isn't ours. Sorry, but this isn't their place to do what they want until August 1st. Actually, by July 28th they should be able to start moving things in if they really need to, because we'll have completely vacated by then.

Anyway, so far so good today. Haven't heard from or seen anybody. I'm still on edge but we'll see how the next few days go.


I took over a house from another tenant and they refused to give the landlord the key until their time was officially up. Apparently the landlord refused to give them a break on the rent even though we would have gladly paid the difference. So you can threaten to do that if they don't get their act together. Legally the place is yours until the first.
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