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New reality show debuting! Post your funniest hospital stor
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mha3484




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 4:48 pm
When my son was 4 he got really sick on shabbos. We thought he had appendicitis and went into the ER. High fever, diarrhea the works. He was so so out of it. We were in the ER and they needed to put in an IV and take blood and he must have protested because I said when we went home I would buy him anything he wanted. Later on he looks at me in his lethargic stupor and tells me I want a chocolate cheese danish. It was so oddly specific for his age that I laughed really hard. Turned out it was just severe stomach flu and not his appendix.
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Beingreal




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 6:07 pm
The fire alarm went off on the hospital when I had my baby. Turned out a nurse was microwaving something...it was 2 am!!!
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amother




Jade
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 6:54 pm
The day after birth, the nurse came to take my temperature. I just got a funny text message from someone so I couldn't stop laughing. The thermometer went under my tongue and it took 3x for the nurse to get a good reading. I told her the machine must not be working. She said it worked for everyone else. It didn't help that it was the same nurse who came to take my temp the next day LOL
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notshanarishona




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 8:37 pm
In E”Y, the Arabs were notorious for helping themselves to other peoples food in shared fridges (where each patient had a labeled shelf or spot) so I started putting soap , salt etc in a empty milk/ ketchup other bottle as a decoy and after a few days no one stole my food anymore.
I was in the dining room once and watched someone pour bubbles over their cereal and couldn’t stop laughing. Served them right
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notshanarishona




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 8:39 pm
Also an only in E”Y story, I couldn’t stand sleeping in the hospital and had a really unpleasant roommate. The nurse gave me “permission “ to leave after I got my iv changed at 11 as long as I was back before doctors rounds at 530 and did it discreetly so all week I went home to sleep and made it back with no one the wiser.
I wasn’t so sick that I really needed round the clock care, was just on iv antibiotics and waiting for the picc line to be put in so I had to stay in patient for a week or so
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:04 pm
notshanarishona wrote:
Also an only in E”Y story, I couldn’t stand sleeping in the hospital and had a really unpleasant roommate. The nurse gave me “permission “ to leave after I got my iv changed at 11 as long as I was back before doctors rounds at 530 and did it discreetly so all week I went home to sleep and made it back with no one the wiser.
I wasn’t so sick that I really needed round the clock care, was just on iv antibiotics and waiting for the picc line to be put in so I had to stay in patient for a week or so
Rolling Laughter Rolling Laughter ...and the nurses had one patient less to check up on night.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:05 pm
notshanarishona wrote:
In E”Y, the Arabs were notorious for helping themselves to other peoples food in shared fridges (where each patient had a labeled shelf or spot) so I started putting soap , salt etc in a empty milk/ ketchup other bottle as a decoy and after a few days no one stole my food anymore.
I was in the dining room once and watched someone pour bubbles over their cereal and couldn’t stop laughing. Served them right
smart girl!!
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:07 pm
Beingreal wrote:
The fire alarm went off on the hospital when I had my baby. Turned out a nurse was microwaving something...it was 2 am!!!
oh my! Did everyone stay put?

I hate when they test the alarm in the hospital. Had it countless times- you just want to run but there you are with a patient hooked up to who knows what... you run to the door and see it’s business as usual at the nurses station...
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:11 pm
mha3484 wrote:
When my son was 4 he got really sick on shabbos. We thought he had appendicitis and went into the ER. High fever, diarrhea the works. He was so so out of it. We were in the ER and they needed to put in an IV and take blood and he must have protested because I said when we went home I would buy him anything he wanted. Later on he looks at me in his lethargic stupor and tells me I want a chocolate cheese danish. It was so oddly specific for his age that I laughed really hard. Turned out it was just severe stomach flu and not his appendix.

He sure had something good in mind amidst of a stomach flu...
Speaking of treats for kids behaving- dc thinks that the splint aka “no-no” is a prize for being brave when getting an iv inserted. Dc gets SOO excited to the “prize” and no one is happier than this little patient when the nurses give a choice of styles and who’s talking when it’s a Mickey themed! Happiest kid
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:15 pm
amother [ Burntblack ] wrote:
Irritating roommates, how funny
Arbitrary hospital rules, very funny
Rude nurses, extremely funny
Doctors who don’t know anything , also super funny
Non existent baby nurseries after you had a c section, funny
I can go on, should I?


Is my life funny enough for you?


Sounds like you’ve had more than your share of very annoying stays... sorry to hear that. Trust me bdtd (including some things today) but I personally prefer to focus on the funny and bizarre hospital experiences to keep me going and invited others to share.
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amother




Wheat
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:23 pm
Got the same spot in the er on two consecutive visits. One time was withering in pain from the iv. I kept complaining and they came and showed me the flexibility of it and that it shouldn't be hurting. Turns out the nurse forgot to take off the tourniquet and I hadn't realized with my sleeve draped over it.

I think the most fun in the hospital is the fun we choose to have. Like answering the nurse funny answers or just joking around about now having stories for the grandkids.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:25 pm
amother [ Aster ] wrote:
Well, there was the time I was nursing my eldest in the hospital with the curtain around the bed closed. A doctor asked if it was ok to come in and I said yes even though I wasn't entirely covered, since I figured it was the hospitalist who had already seen everything anyway. Oops! It turned out it was someone from our new pediatric practice and I hadn't recognized the name since they all use their first names only and I was a brand new mother who had yet to meet any of the pediatricians. I was so embarrassed! He was really nice and backed out really quickly to give me a chance to get myself together.

ETA: A nursing cover is always the first item I pack for subsequent labors.


Oy I would be mortified had such a thing happened to me as a new mother.
The first time we met with one of my child’s specialists was a day after I made a simcha. We were discharged less than a week earlier from a 4-5 days admission that was on the heels of a couple of admissions one after the other sandwiched between appointments. To say life was hectic is an understatement.

So there I am sitting in the waiting room and PLOTZING because I left my house at a very very early hour. Leaving my husband home with a bunch of little kids to send off to school and the doctor is just not showing up. Finally, I was brought to a room and waited and waited some more. My then about 13-14 month old was hungry so of course the minute I start nursing- in walks the doctor and 3 fellows Can't Believe It she backed out right away saying she can come back, but I said it’s ok and unlatched baby. Whenever I think back to this I’m like omg my bra remained unhooked TMI
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amother




Acacia
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:39 pm
I officially do not sleep when I'm in the hospital. So for the 3 days I was there after a c-section, the same night nurse came at different timings to try to catch me sleeping.
When I had gallbladder issues after having that baby, and I was stuck in the hospital for a whole week, every time there was shift change, I overheard the nurse telling the new nurse on call: in bed B we have Mrs so and so, she's post partum and very weepy about not being with her baby, treat her nicely.
Then there was the time by a different birth that the Dr actually forgot to come and discharge me. I was crying the whole day that it's not fair, I'm always the lucky recipient of peoples forgetfulness.
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amother




Ginger
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:40 pm
When I gave birth to one of my kids I shared a room with a very chassidish woman I'm litvish.
We stuck up a very nice conversation and it turned our we had mutual friends.
We were interrupted by someone who came to visit me.
My back was to the door so I couldn't see who was there but my roommate had the strangest look on her face.
I turned around to see a nun. She sat down to schmooze with me and wish me a Mazel tov.
After a minute she saw my confusion.
She cleared it up.
My friend who was an outpatient on dialysis was there wanted to come say hi but was too weak so she asked the nun to go instead but my friend forgot to call me to tell me the nun was coming up.
I guess it was better than if a priest came.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:42 pm
amother [ Wheat ] wrote:
Got the same spot in the er on two consecutive visits. One time was withering in pain from the iv. I kept complaining and they came and showed me the flexibility of it and that it shouldn't be hurting. Turns out the nurse forgot to take off the tourniquet and I hadn't realized with my sleeve draped over it.

I think the most fun in the hospital is the fun we choose to have. Like answering the nurse funny answers or just joking around about now having stories for the grandkids.

Ouch
Re bolded Yes

Oh, and there’s one room and ER nurse that’s like officially ours...

I had a run in with a ER attending once that was being very dismissive when there was a serious life threatening infection requiring surgery going on (they obviously didn’t know it right then).

I ended up writing a long letter to the hospital with things that went wrong in that admission and needed fixing up.
Apparently this ER doc was reprimanded (I then heard from our primary doc that this attending is quite a snob and tends to be dismissive) in any case, at our next ER visit 2 days after I got a reply from the hospital president we were back in the ER and yup, same attending is on!

She was super super nice to us. the hour was late, I hadn’t eaten all day and no nurses or child life were available to stay in the room with my child so I can run up to the bikur cholim room. Dr. Attending herself b’chvodo uv’atzmo volunteered to stay in our cubicle to “babysit” while I ran through the huge hospital to grab food. (Sadly it was pretty empty, it was right after Yom tov and not yet restocked, so I stayed hungry... Shout out to the amazing volunteers and orgs stocking the chesed rooms!!) but I did bring the doctor back candies or something and she was enjoying the video streaming on my laptop- shloimy gertner hands in the air was playing then (and my kid was sleeping soundly ).
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amother




Catmint
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 9:48 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
oh my! Did everyone stay put?

I hate when they test the alarm in the hospital. Had it countless times- you just want to run but there you are with a patient hooked up to who knows what... you run to the door and see it’s business as usual at the nurses station...


We stayed put but it was Shavuos and I just fell asleepp!!
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 10:31 pm
BrisketBoss wrote:
I know it's a nickname for their moshiach but why also Santa? Never heard we needed a codename for him.

Dunno
I guess it’s the “Yiddish version” or just a way to say Santa without all the people in the mall knowing who we’re talking about Wink ?
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 10:34 pm
amother [ Ginger ] wrote:
When I gave birth to one of my kids I shared a room with a very chassidish woman I'm litvish.
We stuck up a very nice conversation and it turned our we had mutual friends.
We were interrupted by someone who came to visit me.
My back was to the door so I couldn't see who was there but my roommate had the strangest look on her face.
I turned around to see a nun. She sat down to schmooze with me and wish me a Mazel tov.
After a minute she saw my confusion.
She cleared it up.
My friend who was an outpatient on dialysis was there wanted to come say hi but was too weak so she asked the nun to go instead but my friend forgot to call me to tell me the nun was coming up.
I guess it was better than if a priest came.

This is hilarious!
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amother




Hawthorn
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 10:52 pm
When my father, a"h, was in the ICU, the nurses would ask him questions to see if lucid. (This was a serious concern, not just a formality). He was super weak but would whisper the craziest answers. Sometimes technically correct, but not what they were looking for. "What year is it?" "tav shin peh". Or silly inside jokes with us. They would have to look at us for confirmation that he was all there. We were like, "yeah, yeah, he's all good".
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rikkik




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Jul 21 2021, 11:01 pm
I went to visit my grandmother who was in critical condition. When I walked into the hospital, I got confused when they started running to me with a wheelchair, and asking me how I felt. Turns out they thought I was there to give birth (I was 8 months pregnant).
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