What's the source for naming after a relative?

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Forum -> Pregnancy & Childbirth -> Baby Names

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amother

NeonOrange

Fri, Aug 06 2021, 3:19 am

Some of you mentioned being disrespectful and not taking parents /in laws feelings into account when naming a child.

Let's be very clear, there is no disrespect in this situation. There will be upset people, not because you disrespected them, but because they are out of line and demanding something that is not rightfully their decision.

I don't like when people pull the disrespect card in all situations.

SYA

Fri, Aug 06 2021, 3:55 am

It is well known that the parents receive ruach hakodesh for the naming of a child. The grandparents do not. When the child is born and the psrents "meet" the child they get a feeling of what name would be best for the baby.

It is not for the grandparents or anyone else to mix in to this special time.

imaima

Fri, Aug 06 2021, 3:56 am

HonesttoGod wrote:

With some of my kids there happened to be a name in the family to name after that we liked and we felt “fit” the baby (there’s a real thing about ruach halodesh and seeing the baby “match” the name apparently).

And with a couple we chose a few names we liked, found some family members on both sides that had said name (great great grandparents/uncles/aunts etc) and then went with the one we felt fit best.

More than the “honoring your parents by giving x name”, there is something true and real about a parent knowing and feeling which name is right. It’s 10000% your choice at the end of the day, family feelings be damned (well not your dh but extended family etc).

This.
With our first kids, we had a pool of names and we chose what appealed to us with any given child. It didn't always make sense, so I do believe in Ruach Hakodesh. For example, Shmuel was always an option but I only felt like it was a good name with my youngest son.
One of the relatives who had a very "out there" name, was honoured by a letter. I could not give the actual name to a child born in the 21 century.

since our parents are only traditional and don't care about actual halachos of naming, doing just a letter was good enough for them.

imaima

Fri, Aug 06 2021, 3:57 am

amother [ NeonOrange ] wrote:

Some of you mentioned being disrespectful and not taking parents /in laws feelings into account when naming a child.

Let's be very clear, there is no disrespect in this situation. There will be upset people, nit because you disrespected them, but because they are out of line and demanding something that is not rightfully their decision.

I don't like when people pull the disrespect card in all situations.

This. Just as parents have no say what you do in the bedroom, and it is not disrespecr, they have no say what you name a child 9 months later.

amother

Canary

Fri, Aug 06 2021, 4:24 am

imaima wrote:

since our parents are only traditional and don't care about actual halachos of naming, doing just a letter was good enough for them.

There are no actual halachos of naming.

amother

Fri, Aug 06 2021, 2:44 pm

some really good perspectives. especially the poster that mentioned about some parents parent in a way that makes their kids want to please them.

on a totally different note, should I have the opposite gender there's a name I would also "have to" give and I'm okay with the name itself, except that person was extremely difficult. when they say "you want your child to carry on that person's middos...." that's really not the case.
What happens now??

THESE are the reasons why parents of babies should choose whatever name, from tanach, or made-up, they please.

salt

Sun, Aug 08 2021, 10:47 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

If the name of the person with negative middot is a standard name also belonging to other people, so have in mind the other people too. eg. if your aunt Sarah was a difficult person, have in mind when naming the baby, Sarah Imeinu.

amother

Outerspace

Mon, Aug 09 2021, 4:01 am

amother [ Apricot ] wrote:

Totally get that Rosepink, but I have to say something. When you're naming a baby you're giving a name to holy neshama that you, your dh and Hashem just brought into this world. It's not a good time for l'hachis. It's not a good time for any kind of kaas or angry feelings. People like to say that the baby's mother has special ruach hakodesh to know what name to give. I don't know a source for that, could be it's true. I do know the nevi'im themselves were not able to get nevuah unless they were in a state of simcha. Feeling anger at others would probably cancel out any chance you have at getting the ruach hakodesh to name your baby. Not telling you what name to give, just something to think about.

Ruach hakodesh is given to the parents not the grandparents

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