How much did you spend making a bar mitzvah?

amother

Cornsilk

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 8:27 pm

Goal was 10k-15k but after clothing and all the last minute extras It was more like 20k-25k!! Not sure how.

We did a catered shabbos for about 80 ppl. Kiddush for ladies and men. It was winter so motzei shabbos we had music and desserts for about 100 ppl. The motzei shabbos food cost $2k.
We did it all in our Shul with a party planner. Gemach tablecloths.

Crazy crazy expensive. It all adds up quickly.

To break it down this includes photographer, a new wig and clothing for myself, makeup for 2 of us, hair for 4 girls, hats for bar Mitzva boy plus father and brother, new suits and shoes for all, clothing and shoes for a few girls,

Food and paper goods for Friday afternoon, nosh and Cake and stuff for shabbos afternoon…

Invitations. Stamps!!!

We also made hostess boxes for all our guests. And bought hostess gifts for the ppl who hosted our guests.

Adding expenses as I think of them.

Hashem_Yaazor

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 8:30 pm

Under 10k for sure, including Tefillin. Catering was about 4k, meals for about 80 over shabbos plus kiddush in shul. Suits, hat, sale dresses for girls, tailoring, balloons as centerpieces, self printed benchers, invitations were maybe 250 for printing and mailing? No professional photography. Bo bayom at our home.

amother

Cherry

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 8:55 pm

Prep $4000
Tefillin, tallis, bag
Leining
Pshetl
Invitations + stamps
Hostess gifts
Tefillin party donuts
Benchers

Clothing $1000
Bar mitzvah boy suit, shoes, shirt
Parents clothing
6 siblings
Hair and makeup
2 Hats

Weekday party - $5000
100 ppl catered + 20 kids
Music
Photographer
Dessert table

Men and women kiddush $800

Friday night $800
45 ppl homemade
Shabbos lunch $300
70 ppl homemade
Shalosh seudos $100
40 ppl. Neighbors sent food
Check and fix eruv $400

Grand total was around $13000

I thought I was being pretty frugal was so was shocked at final cost.

This really includes everything down to the soup croutons.

amother

Valerian

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 8:58 pm

Never made bar mitzvah. Iyh in 3 years. Just made baby kiddush and had 60 ppl for shabbos and it cost me 8k... imagining bar mitzvah is more.

amother

Blueberry

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 8:59 pm

This is a rlly interesting thread for me. Iyh will be making a bar mitzvah in few years and heard from start to finish all expenses are around 30k. Live in Boro park if that makes any difference. Personally think it’s ridiculous however the poster above broke it down and did basic and found very very cheap clothing for family and still spent 13k. So I guess will have a sticker shock when time comes iyh

amother

Natural

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 9:03 pm

amother [ Valerian ] wrote:

Never made bar mitzvah. Iyh in 3 years. Just made baby kiddush and had 60 ppl for shabbos and it cost me 8k... imagining bar mitzvah is more.

A catered kiddish for 60 ppl cost you 8 thousand dollars? Am I missing something here?

amother

Poinsettia

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 9:08 pm

We had a kiddush for the community and catered shabbos lunch for maybe 50? It was family plus the class. I believe it was in the $3,000 range iirc. Doesn't include the tefillin, new suits and hats, and we took family pics.

Last year we had an outdoor grab n go covid bar mitzvah, then lunch for family and close friends. Was $1,000 but I splurged on some extras for the grab n go, like personalized cookies. Also did lots of cooking myself.

amother

Cherry

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 10:36 pm

amother [ Natural ] wrote:

A catered kiddish for 60 ppl cost you 8 thousand dollars? Am I missing something here?

I’m assuming she means all 3 Shabbos meals

amother

Valerian

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 10:39 pm

amother [ Natural ] wrote:

A catered kiddish for 60 ppl cost you 8 thousand dollars? Am I missing something here?

I had 60 ppl for three meals in shabbos. I did not cater everything for the meals only some things.
I catered the kiddush and had: (kiddush was about 200 ppl. I had 60 guests foe the shabbos meals)
5 salads
Fruit (cut ourselves)
Candy station
Herring/kichel
Pastry table ( mostly miniatures)
Cholent/kugel/yapchik/yerushalmi kugel
6 big meat boards
Morrocan food

Had waiters and cleaning help straight thru
Also bought props to set up kiddush.

Because everyone needed to sleep over I also made guest boxes/hostess gifts.

amother

Latte

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 11:07 pm

Around 10k.
1500 tefillin
5k weekday catered party for 100 including a one man band a photographer for part of it
1500 for basic kiddush for men in shul and a nice kiddush, mostly homemade for women
2k suit, hats, clothing for family
500 - homemade Shabbos for 30

Eta: Lakewood

amother

Lavender

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 11:21 pm

Around 5 thousand, including clothing and tefilin.

Mostly home cooked party in our yard for family and friends and a very low key kiddush in our shul.

amother

Apricot

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 11:22 pm

If in Brooklyn and you did for less than 10k, please give me some tips like hall, caterer. Almost all caterers I asked in Brooklyn quoted 12k for the food, bakery items and drinks for about 120 people.

amother

Ginger

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 11:56 pm

At least $40,000 I think. But I stopped counting at one point .

Some that I remember

Hall: $3000
Motivator $1800
Dj $1500
Photograoher $800
Party Planner $18000
Bar $500
Video $350
Clothing , hair, makeup for myself $800
Bar mitzvah boy wardrobe $2000

It goes on and on...

amother

Ballota

Wed, Aug 11 2021, 11:59 pm

amother [ Cherry ] wrote:

how did you spend 1000 on everyone's clothing?
I spent 1000 on my bar mitzva boy!
then like 350 on me, 300 on my girls, and new suits for the boys...
and that was before hair sheital make up situation!