It’s 1 week until school and.. UPDATE

amother

Fuchsia

Mon, Aug 23 2021, 1:53 pm

Im so sorry Crying

hashem should give you the koach to get through this difficult time and be able to look back really really soon and see how it was all for the best.

Im not familiar with the grades in UK. Is your child at an age where he understands what is going on with his situation?

Success10

Mon, Aug 23 2021, 2:41 pm

Don't stop calling. Then wait a day or two and call again. Your child is sitting at home. Show them that. Don't settle for a school that doesn't suit your needs.

There are hardly any days of school for the next month and a half. You're not missing much. I would make the deadline to send him to a bedieved school after the Chagim, if you can hold out that long. Or choose a day that you will officially settle on something else. But until then, don't give up. We're all cheering you on.

amother

NeonGreen

Mon, Aug 23 2021, 9:07 pm

I really don't understand this. Am I the only person who doesn't like the idea that my baby is going to spend his childhood under the chinuch of people who could stand there and say no to a child. Someone who could lie to other people that there is no room for them, when suddenly they have room for a different child, someone who is so greedy that they care more about money than about human beings? This is the chinuch our children are getting! Am I the only one who cares?

amother

Wheat

Mon, Aug 23 2021, 9:25 pm

amother [ Daphne ] wrote:

Must have been more to the story.

There were many stories like these. Not just one. The book about R Gelb is one specific book about a person who devoted himself to collecting charity on behalf of others, including for students forced to leave schools because of $. But read any memoirs or bio of someone frum who grew up back then and you will come across similar stories. Even olameinu had stories like that, as I recall. Somehow though they never focused on the humiliation of the parents, just how sad the kid was because they loved going to a Jewish school and was devastated by being told to leave in the middle of the day and go home, but voila someone came along and took pity on the child and paid up the balance so they could go back in to their classroom. (These stories were about elementary schools not yeshiva or high schools, which barely existed then btw.)
By the late 1940s and 50s things were changing, the day school movement was in full swing, and the Depression was over. There was $ again and the schools were eager to attract as many kids as possible and save them from ps. There are many frum people today descended from those kids who went to day schools for free or very nominal payments in the 50s.
And yeah, there are still kids nowadays who attend schools for reduced or even free tuition.

amother

Tue, Aug 24 2021, 8:39 am

It’s not about the money. I don’t know why you all harping on it. DH offered £10,000 donation (nothing to do with tuition) and they refused. They said they don’t have space.

And the reason I still want to send to these schools is because I don’t really have a choice if I want to raise my child(ren) frum

It’s not like I asked for 1 school, I’ve applied for 5 different schools!

amother

Snapdragon

Tue, Aug 24 2021, 9:16 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

School started today.

Without my child.

I saw this and my heard dropped.
I haven't read the entire thread. Haven't been around much lately....

But this is inexcusable.
We are shuggling to pay tuition. And mortgage and grocery. And our house is in disrepair.

Last night we finally got my dcs admission card. We weren't sure she'd be able to start 1st grade with the rest of the school. I was sick with anxiety.

I'm so so so sorry for your pain. Hashem should give you koyach to withstand this nisoyan.

I hope your child gets in soon.
And iyh you should see extra siyata dishmaya with your children now and in the future.

One of dh grand plans when we fall into some money is to do just this. Open and fund a school for children of familes struggling financially and to never turn away a child.
One day. Moshiach should be here sooner iyh!

Please excuse my grammar. English isn't my first language.

Chayalle

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:24 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

My relative told the school that there is no longer space around her dining room table for her child either. That when your kid isn't in school, your home feels like it's caving in on you, no matter how spacious. That this is a Jewish child, and someone needs to take responsibility.

I'm hoping and davening that you will have good news to share with us.

emma07

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:41 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I am so But you refuse to send your kids to chabad but still complain you have no school to go to! Sending your kids to a chanas school doesn’t make them not frum!
Sorry to be so blunt but blunt

Success10

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:53 am

emma07 wrote:

I am so But you refuse to send your kids to chabad but still complain you have no school to go to! Sending your kids to a chanas school doesn’t make them not frum!
Sorry to be so blunt but blunt

You really can't judge her, you do NOT know her full situation. I really can't imagine that your post is helpful to her. She's thought about her options good and hard, and no one cares about her child more than she does.

emma07

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:57 am

Success10 wrote:

I am sorry but if you think you can’t send your kids to a chabad because they won’t stay religious.. even if they have no other school to go to you are part of the problem

Success10

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:14 am

emma07 wrote:

I am sorry but if you think you can’t send your kids to a chabad because they won’t stay religious.. even if they have no other school to go to you are part of the problem

I don't think the OP said that...

Chayalle

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:24 am

emma07 wrote:

I am sorry but if you think you can’t send your kids to a chabad because they won’t stay religious.. even if they have no other school to go to you are part of the problem

I think the OP said the Chabad school doesn't work for her. She doesn't say why. We don't have to know all her reasons.

And she said she can't send her kids to the place they are telling her, because she's worried about them being frum if she sends to a non-frum setting. She didn't say Chabad there.

amother

Vermilion

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:27 am

emma07 wrote:

I think sending to a school that is not in line with your haskafas, whether it's more/less frum or whatever, is difficult. Your child is in a school for many hours a day for many years, these are their formative years to make sense of the world and become who they will be.
If they have to keep bumping against everyone in my class does/doesn't do x and y, it's very hard. Especially at the young age of 5 when they don't know enough or are strong enough to understand why they might do things differently to how they're taught.
I think Chabad/lubavitch are wonderful but I am not chabad and I wouldn't send my child to the local chabad school. I also wouldn't send them to any of the chassidish chedarim or any school that was not in line with my general haskafas.They do different davening/benching, different pronunciation of alef beis and the vowels. I just don't see how it's fair to the child.
Op, I hope your son has a place in school by now.

amother

Oxfordblue

Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:30 am

Lizzie4 wrote:

I know someone in Lakewood who bought a desk and parked it in one of the classrooms on the first day of H.S. after they said there was not enough room. They took her daughter.

Um, how did the school let it? Not even talking about the poor kid, to come sit in class and telling teachers/principal you weren't accepted...