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How can I tell this to my boss?
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 9:09 pm
I'm the office manager in an office of a handful of employees. Right now, with the work that we do, its getting pretty stressful in of itself as well as overwhelming now that YT season is here and we'll be missing many days of work.

My boss is aware. He keeps telling me so. Honestly, he throws a lot at me and kind of steps back from all the details and expects me to take care of everything (plus remind him about things that are his department as well Smile ) Obviously its fine. That's what I was hired for and am getting paid for.

the problem here is that I'm not the owner of the business. I'm a hired employee. I keep telling boss that things are not happening, I'm only one person, and can't do it all. and things are getting out of hand etc etc.

all he responds is 'ok so do the best you can, go find a new hire, we'll have to prioritize etc.

all these things are very nice in theory. the problem is that when I let things 'fall or push things aside since its impossible now to get to everything, I'm the one that everyone (boss, clients...) get upset at. and once either client or boss is upset, I can't pass the blame even though I was advised this way...

am I making sense? I'm frustrated. and I keep telling boss this and he just keeps telling me its okay. but its not okay! and it won't be okay when it becomes 'all my fault...

what can I tell him so he'll get it?
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amother




Stoneblue
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:11 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I'm the office manager in an office of a handful of employees. Right now, with the work that we do, its getting pretty stressful in of itself as well as overwhelming now that YT season is here and we'll be missing many days of work.

My boss is aware. He keeps telling me so. Honestly, he throws a lot at me and kind of steps back from all the details and expects me to take care of everything (plus remind him about things that are his department as well Smile ) Obviously its fine. That's what I was hired for and am getting paid for.

the problem here is that I'm not the owner of the business. I'm a hired employee. I keep telling boss that things are not happening, I'm only one person, and can't do it all. and things are getting out of hand etc etc.

all he responds is 'ok so do the best you can, go find a new hire, we'll have to prioritize etc.

all these things are very nice in theory. the problem is that when I let things 'fall or push things aside since its impossible now to get to everything, I'm the one that everyone (boss, clients...) get upset at. and once either client or boss is upset, I can't pass the blame even though I was advised this way...

am I making sense? I'm frustrated. and I keep telling boss this and he just keeps telling me its okay. but its not okay! and it won't be okay when it becomes 'all my fault...

what can I tell him so he'll get it?


I would suggest being very specific. This is what will be done, this will not. I can get this done or that, not both.
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amother




Raspberry
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:37 pm
Tell him we need a new hire and I am not finding the time to get that done. I'd like us to pay a recruiter to find someone suitable for the position.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:53 pm
amother [ Raspberry ] wrote:
Tell him we need a new hire and I am not finding the time to get that done. I'd like us to pay a recruiter to find someone suitable for the position.


Hiring means I gotta train in! Which takes at least a month that everything falls apart because I can’t train ans so my job fully at the same time and it take about a month to get a new hire familiar with the office…anyway no one will start until after succos so that still is a month away. But I’m going to use your recruiter idea. (When I tell him so please hire, he responds but you need to ask around and find me someone’ and then I get mad that he keeps just throwing the ball into my court when it’s his own business and he’s not taking responsibility for it!
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:55 pm
amother [ Stoneblue ] wrote:
I would suggest being very specific. This is what will be done, this will not. I can get this done or that, not both.


I literally just did I this tonight. I was answering emails and sent him an email letting him know that these 3 things are not able to get done right now. He responded “please try to take care of it as best as you can even if it won’t be perfect. Just prioritize. Like hello?????!!’n
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amother




Stoneblue
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:55 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Hiring means I gotta train in! Which takes at least a month that everything falls apart because I can’t train ans so my job fully at the same time and it take about a month to get a new hire familiar with the office…anyway no one will start until after succos so that still is a month away. But I’m going to use your recruiter idea. (When I tell him so please hire, he responds but you need to ask around and find me someone’ and then I get mad that he keeps just throwing the ball into my court when it’s his own business and he’s not taking responsibility for it!


There's no one in the office who can help train in? I work in an office and never seen a manager train - usually someone senior but not in management does that.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 10:59 pm
amother [ Stoneblue ] wrote:
There's no one in the office who can help train in? I work in an office and never seen a manager train - usually someone senior but not in management does that.

No, I’m the only one. I know it’s crazy! Most employees are not good enough or working in the field long enough to train and the few really good ones can’t stop their work to do it and they would basically tell my boss they can’t. Everyone hates to train. It’s torture. So it all just falls on me.
The one time we tried having the training split between two employees it was a disaster. I basically had to retrain…
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amother




Stoneblue
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:04 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
No, I’m the only one. I know it’s crazy! Most employees are not good enough or working in the field long enough to train and the few really good ones can’t stop their work to do it and they would basically tell my boss they can’t. Everyone hates to train. It’s torture. So it all just falls on me.
The one time we tried having the training split between two employees it was a disaster. I basically had to retrain…


I know this isn't going to help you now, but what you need is an assistant! If not full time than someone who does the regular work with a lighter load and can be there for you when you need to be doing two things at once.

I would suggest emailing him back firmly stating you can only get those things he wants done at the expense of other specific things, and you will need to reach out to a recruiter directly after Yom Tov to find a person to help you.
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Persevere




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:04 pm
You need to hire a smart and capable assistant. Give them basic tasks at first to slightly lessen your load. The goal is as time goes on, they will become increasingly competent. It is well worth the investment, as the current situation is not sustainable and will continue to spiral (even further) out of control.
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amother




Raspberry
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:10 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Hiring means I gotta train in! Which takes at least a month that everything falls apart because I can’t train ans so my job fully at the same time and it take about a month to get a new hire familiar with the office…anyway no one will start until after succos so that still is a month away. But I’m going to use your recruiter idea. (When I tell him so please hire, he responds but you need to ask around and find me someone’ and then I get mad that he keeps just throwing the ball into my court when it’s his own business and he’s not taking responsibility for it!

I am an OM. I understand. I go through this often. There is no way to get out of this hole without sucking it up and just hiring. Yes that first month is hell. But you're going through hell anyway. Bite the bullet. Don't push it off another second. Hiring takes time. Start before succos. So hopefully you'll have someone lined up to start immediately post succos.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:11 pm
My boss is pretty cheap. Hiring an assistant is a long shot. Especially with the huge salary new hires are asking for. He thinks he’s paying me big bucks when it’s pretty peanuts but there’s lots of perks to this job and I love it so money doesn’t matter as much for me…that’s also the thing. He thinks he’s paying me so much that he expects everything from me!
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:12 pm
amother [ Raspberry ] wrote:
I am an OM. I understand. I go through this often. There is no way to get out of this hole without sucking it up and just hiring. Yes that first month is hell. But you're going through hell anyway. Bite the bullet. Don't push it off another second. Hiring takes time. Start before succos. So hopefully you'll have someone lined up to start immediately post succos.


Thanks!! You’re right! Gonna get onto it ASAP then!
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amother




Broom
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:15 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I literally just did I this tonight. I was answering emails and sent him an email letting him know that these 3 things are not able to get done right now. He responded “please try to take care of it as best as you can even if it won’t be perfect. Just prioritize. Like hello?????!!’n

I had a similar situation. Don't make yourself crazy. As long as you are communicating to him that you don't have time to do it, then when it doesn't get done he'll know why. I wouldn't respond to this email because he already knows you can't do it and you shouldn't tell him that you can just because he's telling you to try. I had a very similar boss. It's really difficult, but if you like the job otherwise and you want to stay then you need to set boundaries. He's taking advantage of the fact that you're taking such good care of everything and practically running the business for him.
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ces




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:17 pm
What I do is email my boss a summary of everything I have to take care of, including why it's important and what would happen if it dropped. Then I state the obvious, that I can't possibly do all of it, so some of it will be dropping regardless. I usually then outline how I will be prioritizing and which items I'll be pushing off, despite the concerns I've already identified, and then ask her if she agrees with my plan or would like me to prioritize differently. She has always agreed with my plan, but this way if and when things blow up down the line she knew exactly what I was dropping and had specifically agreed to it.

ETA that I am a department manager and my boss is the owner, this is both about personal and department priorities
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SafeAtLast




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:22 pm
Honestly some bosses are not teachable.

I've gone above and beyond for my current one and he doesn't seem to care about important stuff.
Obviously if he doesn't care I lose my motivation to prioritize if isn't priority to him.
I gave leave of notice over a month ago and he hasn't even had a single interview with anyone to replace me.
So far we set up working remotely, but if he thinks I will stay around to train someone when I leave, he can dream on.
I refuse to over extend myself when he doesn't care to do the minimum for his own business.
I've literally tried everything to be on top of his workload, but I can't do more than reminders.
The business suffers, and he doesn't even realize why.

Today I actually went into the office because he asked me to, and he never showed up.
I wasn't even surprised.
If he doesn't respect my time, I definitely don't make myself available after hours when he has "emergencies".

If you want things to change, find a new job.
Otherwise resolve to live with things the way they are.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:22 pm
Thanks for all the suggestions! So emailing him specifics about what I’m doing and what not will unfortunately take too much time that I don’t have. And honestly he knows I take my work so seriously that even when I ask him for his help or input or permission, half the time he isn’t listening to the actual issue and just responds “you know best, or whatever you do I’m good with it…and when I put him in place ans say what shall we do about x he responds retorically “what do YOU think we should do about x” and I say “I asked you for the final decision “ and he says “whatever u want!!!

So I’ll keep putting in email (so I have it I. Writing) what I can or cannot do and hopefully all we end well some how ans we’ll pull thru!

Thanks for the vent lol
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:26 pm
SafeAtLast wrote:
Honestly some bosses are not teachable.

I've gone above and beyond for my current one and he doesn't seem to care about important stuff.
Obviously if he doesn't care I lose my motivation to prioritize if isn't priority to him.
I gave leave of notice over a month ago and he hasn't even had a single interview with anyone to replace me.
So far we set up working remotely, but if he thinks I will stay around to train someone when I leave, he can dream on.
I refuse to over extend myself when he doesn't care to do the minimum for his own business.
I've literally tried everything to be on top of his workload, but I can't do more than reminders.
The business suffers, and he doesn't even realize why.

Today I actually went into the office because he asked me to, and he never showed up.
I wasn't even surprised.
If he doesn't respect my time, I definitely don't make myself available after hours when he has "emergencies".

If you want things to change, find a new job.
Otherwise resolve to live with things the way they are.


Wow!! Your situation sounds really tough!!! My issue is not half as bad. My boss is the nicest and respects me and my work it’s just that he want to take a step back and thinks I’ll take over when in reality I am not allowing it but it’s happening with no choice of my own because I take my job so seriously….
Every boss has its problems and while yours sounds crazy hard and bad, mine is not like that. This is the one issue at hand…
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Persevere




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:32 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thanks for all the suggestions! So emailing him specifics about what I’m doing and what not will unfortunately take too much time that I don’t have. And honestly he knows I take my work so seriously that even when I ask him for his help or input or permission, half the time he isn’t listening to the actual issue and just responds “you know best, or whatever you do I’m good with it…and when I put him in place ans say what shall we do about x he responds retorically “what do YOU think we should do about x” and I say “I asked you for the final decision “ and he says “whatever u want!!!

So I’ll keep putting in email (so I have it I. Writing) what I can or cannot do and hopefully all we end well some how ans we’ll pull thru!

Thanks for the vent lol


Well, he needs to put his money where his mouth is and hire you an assistant. It sounds like business is doing great. Not hiring more help will curb growth and end up being financially a poor decision.
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amother




Mayflower
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:37 pm
Are you getting paid really well? Otherwise just get out and find a new job. There’s plenty. You can’t win with a manager like that. Been there done that
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Sep 01 2021, 11:54 pm
amother [ Mayflower ] wrote:
Are you getting paid really well? Otherwise just get out and find a new job. There’s plenty. You can’t win with a manager like that. Been there done that


I actually don’t have anyone I can ask to confirm if I’m getting paid well or not though I do think it’s in the lower spectrum if salary for what I’m doing. But I rather not move on since I have really good hours and a boss who is okay with me not having to answer emails at all hours of the evening so I can be a semi good mom to my kids. And I can easily work remotely whenever I need to etc…
I can’t give that up too fast
(I’ve been in other jobs so I know that what I have now is not something I want to give up regardless of paycheck)
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