[STORY] Damsel in Distress (Update #15b - 14 Teves p. 22)

a2z

Tue, Nov 02 2021, 1:47 pm

I love the story! Also it's sooooooooo much fun to see that I'm normal LOL

(Author wise)

amother

Lightgreen

Tue, Nov 02 2021, 5:40 pm

a2z wrote:

I love the story! Also it's sooooooooo much fun to see that I'm normal LOL

(Author wise)

Well that was disappointing.

Revafe

Tue, Nov 02 2021, 5:43 pm

amother [ Lightgreen ] wrote:

Well that was disappointing.

Now you did that!

a2z

Wed, Nov 03 2021, 4:07 am

amother [ Lightgreen ] wrote:

Well that was disappointing.

Huh?

amother

Wed, Nov 03 2021, 3:26 pm

a2z wrote:

Huh?

I think they were hoping for an update. Still in progress, sorry!

a2z

Wed, Nov 03 2021, 3:30 pm

Oh, nothing personal Thumbs Up

Sorry for doing this again Can't Believe It

Revafe

Wed, Nov 03 2021, 3:35 pm

OP!!!! I got all excited all over again!

amother

Razzmatazz

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 12:21 pm

We are waiting patiently op! 👍

Hidden

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 12:23 pm

Or not so patiently for some of us!

amother

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 3:55 pm

I have a few scenes for the end of the section, but need to fill in some blanks. But I'll split it up and post the beginning now, even though it's pretty short.

amother

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 3:55 pm

Od Yishama

Sunlight streams into the windows, and Chava opens her eyes.

She feels unsettled, and sleepily wonders why. It takes her a minute to remember that she is now a married woman.

The Chasunah last night feels like just a dream. But there is a tichel on her head and a wedding gown draped over a chair, so it really must have happened.

Her clock tells her that it's still early, but she doesn't want to stay in bed anymore.

After washing negel vasser, Chava sits on her bed for a few minutes, wistfully thinking about weddings she has been to, and how sorry her own seems in comparison. Then she sighs, pushes those thoughts aside, and goes to get dressed for her first day of married life.

----

After davening, Chava feels a little better. She doesn't hear any noise from outside, and relieved not to need to face anyone right away, quietly opens the door to go get something to eat.

As she steps out of the room, the first thing she sees is Eli, sleeping on the couch. Another bochur is sprawled on one of the recliners, and two others are sitting bleary-eyed at the table with mugs of coffee.

To Chava's embarrassment, when they notice her, the two burst into a lively rendition of "Od Yishama."

One of them runs over to Eli and shakes him awake. "Eli, your Kallah's already up and you're still sleeping?" Eli glances at Chava apologetically and signals his friend to bring him Negel Vasser.

Chava decides she'd better escape to the kitchen while everyone else is occupied. This whole situation is beyond awkward.

She doesn't make it there, though.

"Kallahs don't go into the kitchen!" Moishy booms, seeing where Chava is headed. "Eli, say brachos and go sit down with your wife. I'll bring you both something to eat."

Red-faced but resigned, Chava sits in the chair indicated, and a few minutes later, Eli, still a little tousled from sleep, sits down across from her.

A few minutes later, Moishy brings out a platter with store-bought danishes, yogurts, fruit, and two steaming cups of coffee. He then nudges the others to get into the kitchen and give the couple some semblance of privacy.

Chava swallows hard. This not at all how she imagined her first day of marriage to look.

"Just pretend this is normal," she tells herself. "Because this is your normal for now." On further thought, this is actually even a little amusing, right? Chava feels her mood start to lift.

"Good morning, Eli," she says brightly.

"Mazel Tov Chava," he responds, with a genuine smile. Suddenly the day doesn't seem so bad after all.

----

Chava is envious at how much less self-conscious Eli seems.

He helps himself to a cup of coffee and a danish, simultaneously reaching over to relocate the vase of flowers to their end of the table. "Heker," he mouths.

Chava nods and takes a yogurt, trying to pretend to the same casualness.

"How late were you guys up till?" she asks curiously.

"Past three," Eli says, regretfully. "I'm really sorry, I wanted to at least talk a little bit last night, but by the time the party was over, you were already sleeping."

"It's okay," Chava tells him, and is surprised to discover that it really is.

----

Restricted from the kitchen, and feeling weird about going into her own room, Chava sits quietly in a corner as the four Chassanim daven Shacharis. Her eyes are only for Eli, earnestly davening, wrapped in his snow-white Tallis for the first time.

Now he really looks married, she thinks to herself, self-consciously adjusting her shaitel.

As they are wrapping up their Tefillin, Eli again looks like one of the chevra. Part of her is happy for him, that he is able to have his friends rejoicing with him on his first day of marriage. In only a few hours, she knows, they will be off to their own Chuppahs.

The bochurim seem to share the sentiment. They are getting visibly more nervous once Shacharis is behind them.

"Should we be worried, Eli?" one jokes.

"Worried? You guys should be thrilled! It's a simcha! I promise, you won't enjoy it any less than your Bris."

The laughter that follows is a great stress release.

to be continued...
ETA: continued here

Cookiegirl

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 4:14 pm

Love it! OP not only is your writing great, you have a great sense of humor!

amother

Razzmatazz

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 4:18 pm

Love it!!!!!!! 👏👏👏👏

English3

Thu, Nov 04 2021, 4:20 pm

I love the fact that it's so relatable with the heker it just feel so right.

a2z

Fri, Nov 05 2021, 2:49 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Od Yishama

Restricted from the kitchen, and feeling weird about going into her own room, Chava sits quietly in a corner as the four Chassanim daven Shacharis. Her eyes are only for Eli, earnestly davening, wrapped in his snow-white Tallis for the first time.

Now he really looks married, she thinks to herself, self-consciously adjusting her shaitel.

As they are wrapping up their Tefillin, Eli again looks like one of the chevra. Part of her is happy for him, that he is able to have his friends rejoicing with him on his first day of marriage. In only a few hours, she knows, they will be off to their own Chuppahs.

The bochurim seem to share the sentiment. They are getting visibly more nervous once Shacharis is behind them.

"Should we be worried, Eli?" one jokes.

"Worried? You guys should be thrilled! It's a simcha! I promise, you won't enjoy it any less than your Bris."

The laughter that follows is a great stress release.

to be continued...

[b]

Where did the shaitel come from?

amother

Fri, Nov 05 2021, 3:12 am

a2z wrote:

Where did the shaitel come from?

Same place as the wedding gown! Probably a precut.

a2z

Fri, Nov 05 2021, 3:25 am

amother

Steelblue

Fri, Nov 05 2021, 8:11 am

Ok, I'm trying to imagine if the wedding was pushed up and chava wasn't niddah. I think I'd prefer this situation better.

amother

Apricot

Fri, Nov 05 2021, 9:56 am

amother [ Steelblue ] wrote:

Ok, I'm trying to imagine if the wedding was pushed up and chava wasn't niddah. I think I'd prefer this situation better.

No. It think it's better chuppas niddah because life happens and there are mostly wonderful moments but also disappointments. And it's so good to see them make the most of it!
It's so crazy how real OP makes the characters.
You must write a real novel.

Revafe

Sat, Nov 06 2021, 10:47 pm

Whens mikvah night already?? Cud they pls be together already???