Isn't everything good for us that Hashem does?

amother

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 9:46 am

I am struggling with with understanding why we all wish each other a 'git gebensht yuhr', when all Hashem does for us is good anyway.
How can we wish each other only good things if we only have things which are good for us?
True, we need to be able to recognise that it's good even if it doesn't seem so but ultimatelyits for our good so asking/wishing for only good, is it necessary?

Life has challenges and is painful at times to help us grow, so wishing 'only simchas and nachas and good things' isn't really realistic as death and pain is part of life.

Can anyone enlighten me please. I've been trying to make sense of this all....

SixOfWands

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 10:00 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Of course not everything Hashem does to (for?) us is good. We're all aware of that. Some people struggle financially, mentally, or otherwise. Some are ill. Some die. That is Hashem's decree, but that doesn't make it "good." That's what unetanah tokef is all about. So of course we hope that we, and our friends and families, will be inscribed for good things.

Gmar chatima tova.

mfb

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 10:08 am

It’s for our good, but doesn’t necessarily feel good to us.
Like when we tell a child they can’t have more candy they get all upset. Or sometimes we punish a child for they’re own good….
So we ask that the year should be full of things that feel good to us.
That’s how I always understood it.

Genius

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 10:09 am

What Hashem does IS good for the bigger picture, most of which we don’t understand at all. That’s why I always pray and wish for others “m’zul zein de gits” we should see HOW it’s good. A gmar chasima tova to my fellow amothers and all of klal Yisroel.

NotInNJMommy

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 10:20 am

Genius wrote:

Likewise, I try to daven for myself and others to have revealed and sweet blessings and goodness.

dankbar

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 11:43 am

Hashem shouldn't need to test our strengths with challenges....we've had enough! Dai ltzarosainu dai! We need Moshiach, then we will all be good & close to Hashem, we won't have challenges anymore & everything will be revealed to us, so we will see why we needed to go through suffering.

amother

Sapphire

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 11:51 am

In Chabad circles, people often wish each other “only REVEALED good” because, like you say, everything HaShem does is good—but we only want the good that’s obviously good to us, and not good in a hidden way.

And of course, bad (or “hidden good”) things happen all the time, but why shouldn’t we take advantage of an auspicious time of year to bless each other with an extra-good life? Who knows what little miracles are happening because of our layman’s blessing… אל תהיה ברכת הדיוט קל בעיניך

amother

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 11:58 am

dankbar wrote:

But realistically what would be be like today had we not had challenges I our lives??
If we give our kids a smooth and perfect life would they grow up resilient and strong??
Hashem I out father and wants us to grow and become strong and good people ...

SixOfWands

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 12:53 pm

Genius wrote:

I truly envy your faith. I doubt I'll ever reach that level.

As I see it, everything that happens is PART of Hashem's plan, which we assume will be good. But even if everything that happens to us is part of the plan, it doesn't mean its good. And frankly, I have problems believing even in the eventual goodness of the plan.

I was reading about Legacy Beauford. He was 1 year old. He was crying; babies do that. So his mother's boyfriend beat him, and z3xually assaulted him. Legacy died. The medical examiner found bruises all over Legacy’s face and body, several broken ribs and a lacerated liver, which caused him to bleed to death internally. A baby.

I will never have the type of faith that tells me that was good, no matter what part it plays in Hashem's plan. I even have trouble believing that its part of Hashem's plan. Hashem gave this rasha free will. Free will to comfort the baby. Free will to lock himself in the bathroom to get away from the crying. THAT's what Hashem wanted. Not this. I can't believe it is. I can't believe its part of an overall good.

Maybe you can bentch me a bracha of more faith.

Gmar chatima tova.

Genius

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 2:15 pm

SixOfWands wrote:

I don’t believe everything people do is good. (Although admittedly I do have too much faith in the goodness of humanity as a whole). As you said, people have free will. I do believe that everything that happens to us is good. I bentch you that it should be easy for you to believe, life should be that wonderful and sweet.

amother

Trillium

Wed, Sep 15 2021, 2:25 pm

SixOfWands wrote:

You have a very wrong and distorted understanding of Hashem. Yes everything Hashem does is good even if it doesn’t feel good or we don’t understand. It is good for our neshama and only Hashem is privy to everything we need and only after Moshiach or 120 will we understand.

amother

Fern

Thu, Sep 16 2021, 2:58 pm

amother [ Trillium ] wrote:

Feel free to disagree with someone, but are you really sure that you know this? Hashem could have told Iyov that everything was good. But He doesn't. He says that humans don't understand. Not the same thing at all.

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Sep 17 2021, 12:05 am

I’ve recently read a mashal that helped me understand this. Can an infant understand what vaccines do for him? Obviously, as moms, we know that we are doing a huge favor for our children by vaccinating them. (Please hold the antivaxx comments here). But they, in their limited intellect, are sure that what they are experiencing is painful.
Human beings will never fully understand Hashem’s ways, at least not in this world. We simply don’t have the intellectual capacity for it.
But- as we become closer to Hashem and develop our relationship with Him, we often are able to put some puzzle pieces together... to understand how the things that seemed bad were really good, how we grew from our painful experiences , etc. Then, in the future, when difficulties come up, it’s more likely that we’ll be able to accept them as gifts from G-d, they will benefit us in the future.
Happy and sweet new year to all of Am Yisrael!!

amother

Fern

Fri, Sep 17 2021, 1:07 am

amother [ Skyblue ] wrote:

If disease were good for us, we wouldn't daven for good health and try to to prevent illness, would we?

Yes, a person may grow religiously from experiencing illness, but we still daven to be healthy. The fact that something bad may lead to a good result doesn't make it desirable.