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Feel like everything I davened for is going wrong UPDATE

 
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amother




OP
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 11:34 am
Literally since right after Yom Kippur, I have had a series of disappointments related to the things I davened for. They are not huge things, but they are significant.

I came home from shul on such a high, with that good feeling that my tefillos were accepted and then instantly something came up and then another and then another 2 today. I feel like I was punched in the gut. Like my tefillos are mocking me.

I can use a little help putting things in perspective.

I know tefillos don't work like a vending machine, but there is something about the post Yom kippur high and then this that is making me very unsettled.
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amother




Firebrick
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 11:45 am
Hi,

Have something similar. I keep telling myself that the Yetzer Horah wants to take away from my Emunah and High that an amazing year is coming. So I'm just telling him straight out, I'm not letting you take my Simcha away. I turned on the music and danced instead.
Not sure if this will help you but at least allow me to take the opportunity to wish you an amazing year, a Gut gebentcht yur, and may all your Tefillos be answered.
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amother




OP
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 11:47 am
amother [ Firebrick ] wrote:
Hi,

Have something similar. I keep telling myself that the Yetzer Horah wants to take away from my Emunah and High that an amazing year is coming. So I'm just telling him straight out, I'm not letting you take my Simcha away. I turned on the music and danced instead.
Not sure if this will help you but at least allow me to take the opportunity to wish you an amazing year, a Gut gebentcht yur, and may all your Tefillos be answered.


Amein! I cried when I read this! Same to you!
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thunderstorm




 
 
 
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 11:55 am
I want to validate you and to let you know that I understand that let down and disappointment. This year I ended up the first day of RH in the hospital with my DS who got injured right before shofar. That was how the morning of the new year started for me and it has continued down that track. I was feeling so defeated and let down on Rosh Hashana. Like I was not even given a chance. But DH keeps telling me that when lots of difficulties occur right in the beginning of the new year, it’s a sign that good things are coming. He told me a source where this is brought down but I don’t recall. (I was too busy being miserable). I’m hoping this is true. Maybe the picture looks bleak and it lets us down. But I remind myself that the clear picture is what I don’t see. I only see the back of the needlepoint, a mess of colorful threads. But HaShem sees the beautiful portrait on the right side of tapestry. Every stitch is in the proper place. I daven that we both be zoche to see the beautiful side of the picture very soon.
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amother




OP
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 12:02 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
I want to validate you and to let you know that I understand that let down and disappointment. This year I ended up the first day of RH in the hospital with my DS who got injured right before shofar. That was how the morning of the new year started for me and it has continued down that track. I was feeling so defeated and let down on Rosh Hashana. Like I was not even given a chance. But DH keeps telling me that when lots of difficulties occur right in the beginning of the new year, it’s a sign that good things are coming. He told me a source where this is brought down but I don’t recall. (I was too busy being miserable). I’m hoping this is true. Maybe the picture looks bleak and it lets us down. But I remind myself that the clear picture is what I don’t see. I only see the back of the needlepoint, a mess of colorful threads. But HaShem sees the beautiful portrait on the right side of tapestry. Every stitch is in the proper place. I daven that we both be zoche to see the beautiful side of the picture very soon.


Amein! Thanks for the chizzuk and only the best for you as well!

To exacerbate the issue, I was very determined to approach this year's yomim noraaim in a very positive light. I only listened to positive and uplifting speeches and gave my family a whole pep talk about how it's not scary, it's a wonderful opportunity to connect and a gift to be able to daven when Hashem is so close.

It just makes this harder to swallow. Like maybe I was just fooling myself in LA la land....
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NotInNJMommy




 
 
 
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 1:27 pm
Sometimes I've davened for things, and then things happened that seemingly directly or indirectly countered that....but often if I was patient and tried to keep a cool head, I would see in the coming days, weeks, or months, how those things actually really set up something to come through. IYH you should see revealed fulfillment of Hashem's blessings for you!
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amother




OP
 

Post Fri, Sep 17 2021, 1:28 pm
NotInNJMommy wrote:
Sometimes I've davened for things, and then things happened that seemingly directly or indirectly countered that....but often if I was patient and tried to keep a cool head, I would see in the coming days, weeks, or months, how those things actually really set up something to come through. IYH you should see revealed fulfillment of Hashem's blessings for you!


Amein! Thank you
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amother




OP
 

Post Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:44 pm
Wanted to come back here to post a little update.

First I wanted to thank everyone who replied and gave me chizuk. It really helped me keep going. It strengthened me to not throw in the towel and to keep on davening and work on myself throughout sukkos and Hashanah Rabba in a different way than I would have if Yom kippur would have just ended and everything would have been regular and I would have just moved on to cooking for Yom Tov.

Since then, I BH really saw an improvement in some of the areas that I was initially disappointed. I can honestly thank Hashem for pushing me a little past the EZ pass zone to tap into myself and stretch a little further!
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jflower




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:46 pm
So glad to hear. Hope to hear more good news.
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amother




OP
 

Post Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:47 pm
jflower wrote:
So glad to hear. Hope to hear more good news.


Amein!
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imamom7




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:52 pm
I had this recently too
I was told to say Hashm youre just giving me little headaches to clear out the pipes of shefa(which are often blocked bec of our sins)
I know you are preparing to send me a tremendous amount of shefa
The confidence in Hashms generosity and that everything is for a good reason will help you get what you want even if you don't deserve it
Im working on it!
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thunderstorm




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:57 pm
That’s so nice to hear! I really appreciate you coming back to post this. May it only get better from here!
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amother




Topaz
 

Post Mon, Oct 04 2021, 10:45 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
I want to validate you and to let you know that I understand that let down and disappointment. This year I ended up the first day of RH in the hospital with my DS who got injured right before shofar. That was how the morning of the new year started for me and it has continued down that track. I was feeling so defeated and let down on Rosh Hashana. Like I was not even given a chance. But DH keeps telling me that when lots of difficulties occur right in the beginning of the new year, it’s a sign that good things are coming. He told me a source where this is brought down but I don’t recall. (I was too busy being miserable). I’m hoping this is true. Maybe the picture looks bleak and it lets us down. But I remind myself that the clear picture is what I don’t see. I only see the back of the needlepoint, a mess of colorful threads. But HaShem sees the beautiful portrait on the right side of tapestry. Every stitch is in the proper place. I daven that we both be zoche to see the beautiful side of the picture very soon.


Wow I really needed to read this! Amen, ken tihyeh, wishing a year of brachos ad bli dai for everyone!
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amother




Silver
 

Post Tue, Oct 05 2021, 12:43 am
thunderstorm wrote:
I want to validate you and to let you know that I understand that let down and disappointment. This year I ended up the first day of RH in the hospital with my DS who got injured right before shofar. That was how the morning of the new year started for me and it has continued down that track. I was feeling so defeated and let down on Rosh Hashana. Like I was not even given a chance. But DH keeps telling me that when lots of difficulties occur right in the beginning of the new year, it’s a sign that good things are coming. He told me a source where this is brought down but I don’t recall. (I was too busy being miserable). I’m hoping this is true. Maybe the picture looks bleak and it lets us down. But I remind myself that the clear picture is what I don’t see. I only see the back of the needlepoint, a mess of colorful threads. But HaShem sees the beautiful portrait on the right side of tapestry. Every stitch is in the proper place. I daven that we both be zoche to see the beautiful side of the picture very soon.

This entire thread and the above has given me a lot of chizuk. I hope everything is going well for everyone. We should all be zocheh to a wonderful year.
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amother




Firebrick
 

Post Tue, Oct 05 2021, 12:48 am
Amein to all the beautiful Brochos here. So special of you to post OP. May you and all of us keep sharing good news with one another.
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Oct 05 2021, 8:51 am
Thanks and amein to all! May it be a year for of Mazel and bracha!
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