If you’re invited for a weekend simcha

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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

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amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 6:14 pm

But the host has no room for you to chill there, as it’s a small house, and your lodging is a small sort of cramped place with no couch etc, where does your family hang out when you’re not in shul/eating meals? (And it’s winter)

amother

Hunter

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:02 pm

In that case we would probably just hang out in the simcha hall at shul (assuming that’s where meals are?)

I’ve never heard of a host not having any sort of set up for people to have a place to spend their free time. People need somewhere to be unless they plan on taking a nap all day.

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:50 pm

amother [ Hunter ] wrote:

These hosts are a little clueless about etiquette and these type of things. A little socially off.
The simcha hall is not a pleasant place to hang out.

Ema of 5

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:58 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

If I knew this was the arrangement ahead of time, either I would make plans maybe to go to someone else’s house in the afternoon or something, or maybe I wouldn’t even go. It depends what the Simcha is, who is making it, how much of the day it will actually take up…

amother

Marigold

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 8:06 pm

I'd have a really hard time with this scenario. I'd either rent an airbnb if feasible, or just go for the Sunday part of the simcha

octopus

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 8:07 pm

The simcha I went to like this was in a school simcha hall. Spent the whole afternoon there.

amother

Amaryllis

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 9:10 pm

I was in such a situation afew times already. I make arrangements with someone to spend the afternoon there.

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 9:12 pm

amother [ Amaryllis ] wrote:

I was in such a situation afew times already. I make arrangements with someone to spend the afternoon there.

I don’t know anyone there.

mommyhood

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 9:19 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

These hosts are a little clueless about etiquette and these type of things. A little socially off.
The simcha hall is not a pleasant place to hang out.

Usually people squash into the hosts house even if they don't expect/want it.
If that's not an option for you then you'll need to pick the lesser of the unpleasant options, hall, your room, a cold park... At least in the winter there's not a lot of free time Shabbos afternoon.

amother

Buttercup

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 9:20 pm

Simchos in the winter don't have much downtime. By the time davening, kiddush and the seuda are over its almost havdala.

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