I'm yekkish AMA | Imamother

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I'm yekkish AMA

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amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:05 pm

since everyone seems to be doing this, I thought I would jump on the train, and see what happens 😂

I'm yekkish, ask me anything!

amother

Copper

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:07 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

since everyone seems to be doing this, I thought I would jump on the train, and see what happens 😂

I'm yekkish, ask me anything!

where do you live?

Reality

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:07 pm

Do the stereotypes bother you?

amother

Dahlia

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:07 pm

Do you wait 3 hours between milk and meat?

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:08 pm

amother [ Copper ] wrote:

where do you live?

Somewhere on the American continent!

one happy mommy

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:08 pm

Are you always on time?

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:09 pm

Reality wrote:

Do the stereotypes bother you?

They really don't- because most do apply to me. I'm very stern, direct, and always on time!
And by on time, I mean 7 minutes early!

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:10 pm

amother [ Dahlia ] wrote:

Do you wait 3 hours between milk and meat?

It's funny, my grandparents (from Frankfurt) did 6 hours, but my husband's grandparents (from München) wait 3 hours. So now I get to wait 3 hours too!

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:10 pm

leebs wrote:

Are you always on time?

I'm always 7-8 minutes early.

one happy mommy

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:10 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

They really don't- because most do apply to me. I'm very stern, direct, and always on time!
And by on time, I mean 7 minutes early!

That's definitely not me, I'm almost always late

amother

Leaf

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:12 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I'm always 7-8 minutes early.

What's enjoyable about that? Do you feel like a better person because of that? Do you look down at those who aren't on time?

amother

Blonde

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:13 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

They really don't- because most do apply to me. I'm very stern, direct, and always on time!
And by on time, I mean 7 minutes early!

I grew up amongst mostly yekkes even though I am not yekke myself and I find I am more on time then they are 10 minutes early always!!! But I was jealous of the fact they got to eat milchigs earlier than me..I think thats why as I a child I stopped eating fleishigs Smile

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:14 pm

leebs wrote:

That's definitely not me, I'm almost always late

Well most people are. I've found "Jewish standard time" is a real thing and I've grown to accept it.
But I was raised in a family where being late is a true form of disrespect (Very much a German thing-not a Jewish thing) and I can't bring myself to be late, and neither can my husband. Kids, very different story.

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:18 pm

amother [ Leaf ] wrote:

What's enjoyable about that? Do you feel like a better person because of that? Do you look down at those who aren't on time?

Oh dear no
The truth is, my husband and I were conditioned to always be on time. Being so much as 5 minutes late is a high form of disrespect to Germans. Being that our parents, grandparents, and environments were German, it was instilled in us from a very early age. And I really grew up planning everything around strict times.

I don't look down on those who aren't on time at all. I think we are all different and we all organize our time differently. Again, Jewish standard time is real and I've even learned to enjoy. My husband and I tend to be the first people to arrive to most non-yekkish simchas and sometimes it's fun. We've gotten to stroll around many wedding halls or outdoor spaces together while waiting for a simcha to start.

amother

Vanilla

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:26 pm

amother [ Leaf ] wrote:

What's enjoyable about that? Do you feel like a better person because of that? Do you look down at those who aren't on time?

They don't do this because they're having fun. They do this because they're very big on "yosher" and being late is stealing the other person's time. The only way to guarantee you won't be late is to factor in extra time as a margin of safety in case of unforeseen delays. In the absence of such delays, this translates into arriving somewhat early. It's a good way to be. Scratch that, it's an excellent, admirable way to be. It shows respect for the other person. Being late shows the reverse.

However, I heard a tale (here we go with anonymous gedolim stories)about the late Rav Joseph Breuer. A bocher had an appointment with him and knew that he didn't cotton to latecomers. So the young man made it his business to arrive a few minutes early. The Rav admitted him but told him that "being early is also not being on time." Which is true if it means you impose your presence on someone before your appointed time.

A friend of mine went out with a guy who always arrived right on the dot. She asked him how he managed that. He admitted that he always came early and walked around the block until it was time to pick her up. This was, of course, back in the good old days when a young man came to his date's parental home to pick her up and brought her back afterwards. None of this meeting a stranger in the lobby of a hotel "Are you Ruchi?" "Are you Moish?" I always imagined a clever guy saying "No, but I wish I were!"

amother

Plum

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:27 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I'm always 7-8 minutes early.

A true yekke is always on time, being early is not on time. 😆

amother

Lightyellow

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:34 pm

Are there different yekkish communities? My grandmother is from Germany and married an American. She didn't keep any Yekkish minhagim. She is from a small town.

Do all Yekkish ppl follow the Breuer's minhagim or not? Is someone Yekkish if they are from Germany, follow the Minhagim or does it need to be both?

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:35 pm

amother [ Plum ] wrote:

A true yekke is always on time, being early is not on time. 😆

Actually a true yekke arrives early and either waites in the car or walks around the block, before actually arriving at the exact time, or one minute early.
because yes arriving early is also as bad as being late!
As the reader who quotes Rav Breuer said, imposing your presence is not good. And being late neither if the other is waiting up for you

amother

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:39 pm

amother [ Lightyellow ] wrote:

Yes there are different yekkish communities, and yes being Yekkish means being German and having been raised with the minhag. I suppose a non-yekkish woman who marries a yekkish man and follows his mesorah could also be called yekkish, even if she's not german.

And no not all yekkish people follow Breuer, although most do. My grandfather BH kept letters from his father's Rov in the 1910s and so we have the exact minhagim and chumras of our community in my family. My husband follows mostly Breuer though.

amother

Brown

Wed, Oct 06 2021, 7:42 pm

Do you wash netilas yadayim before kiddush on Friday night?

Do you (as a mother) bentsch the children Fri night?

Do you daven in a yekkishe shul/ minyan?

Do you do kapparos erev YK?

Do you know what yaares kaddish is?

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