I'm a single mother AMA...

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amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 11:55 am

With 4 children ages 3-14

amother

Snowdrop

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:04 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

With 4 children ages 3-14

What keeps you going? Do you feel lonely?

Makehumusnotwar

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:10 pm

How long have you been divorced?

amother

Mint

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:11 pm

Do you want to get remarried?

Are you the mom and dad or do you have a rebbi or someone learning with your son if you have one?

Do you miss the intimacy how do you handle?🙈 Sorry I'm actually curious and you said ask you anything...

Rhom

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:12 pm

What is one thing you wish you could tell people in regards to how to help you?

What is the hardest part for you?

amother

Oleander

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:13 pm

I'm a single mom too! Can I ask how you manage financially? My greatest struggle is needing to be there for my kids (ALWAYS) and having to work to pay (ALL) the bills.

I hope OP doesn't mind, but someone asked what is something I wish I had a bit of help with-
My friend offered to watch the kids for an hour while I go get my nails and eyebrows done. I couldn't afford to do my nails at that time, but I did an eyebrow waxing and already felt better.
My next door neighbor will occasionally bring up any Amazon deliveries (she knows it's hard for me to bring up things while holding a baby.)
My other friend takes off a lb or two of soup every time she makes a big pot and freezes it for me. When she has a few she'll bring it over. It's nice having a homeade soup that I didn't have to make.

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:24 pm

amother [ Snowdrop ] wrote:

What keeps you going? Do you feel lonely?

There are times when I do feel lonely. But I don't have much time to think because I'm so busy working and raising my kids....

amother

Burgundy

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:24 pm

So sad and challenging
Hatzlocha and hugs!

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:24 pm

Makehumusnotwar wrote:

How long have you been divorced?

2 years

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:28 pm

amother [ Snowdrop ] wrote:

What keeps you going? Do you feel lonely?

To answer the first part of the question what keeps me going. I feel very close to Hashem and turn to him all the time for help. I also hope and dream to get remarried one day so I don't believe I'll be alone forever.

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:30 pm

amother [ Mint ] wrote:

2 of my kids are boys so I have hired tutors to learn with them.

Success10

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:32 pm

Do you care to hear updates on your ex or you honestly couldn't care less?

amother

Hydrangea

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:33 pm

Is your ex in the picture?

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:46 pm

Rhom wrote:

What is one thing you wish you could tell people in regards to how to help you?

What is the hardest part for you?

I'm juggling so much alone and I'm exhausted! Offering to spend some time with my kids would help. Like maybe offer to do bedtime or homework one night.
Invite me over for havdala.
I used to cry at the beginning whenever I made kiddush but I got over it. I felt like the experience war rubbing in the fact that I don't have a husband.
Going to simchas/ PTA / chol hamoed outings with kids, without a husband is awkward but I'm getting better at it BH!
House and car maintenance is time consuming and can be overwhelming.
Dealing with yentas who look at me funny or ask personal questions is annoying...

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 12:48 pm

amother [ Hydrangea ] wrote:

Is your ex in the picture?

Not consistently.

amother

Ghostwhite

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 1:56 pm

As a fellow single mom who works full time, how do you have energy to deal with everything? I could use some tips. After working all day plus the commute, I come home exhausted and want to just pass out. I barely have enough energy to get the kids dinner, let alone do homework and spend time with them. How do you manage juggling it all??