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Determine three year old

 
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Oct 13 2021, 3:30 pm
Hi everyone. I'm hoping some experienced moms can offer some advice here. my oldest is a three year old girl, she is adorable but very rigid and everything takes her a long time. (Great motor skills, she is just not the capable type) take this morning, she woke up at 7 and we leave at 9 to get to nursery. but she doesn't want to get dressed, she wants to play, once she's busy with something I really can't get her out. finally we got dressed and then baby woke up so she had to play with baby and then finally when baby was dressed I got her at a table eating coco pops. it's the only thing she'll eat in the morning. then whilst she eats I put her shoes on and convince her to let me do her hair. then just to get her in the car takes ten minutes!! she sees this toy and wants to play with it, then she wants to take a broom to nursery because it starts with beis (they are currently up to ches) then she sees her shabbos shoes and before I can blink, she pulls off her boots and on go her summer shabbos shoes.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Oct 13 2021, 3:32 pm
Continued. then we get outside and she wants to climb in from the window. mini tantrum happens. then she wants to climb in over the babies seat and strap herself in but then she can't manage... Etc. by the time she gets to nursery I am drained!! everything is a struggle!! any advice or tips?!
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Zehava




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Oct 13 2021, 3:34 pm
Very age appropriate!
It helps to get playful with her at this age. Interest yourself in what she’s doing/playing with, and turn dressing into a game. You can sing songs while you dress her and do her hair. Whatever you do don’t turn it into a power-struggle.
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mha3484




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Oct 13 2021, 3:35 pm
I agree this is pretty common three year old stuff. The best thing you can do is avoid power struggles with toddlers and small children you never win ever.
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s1




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Oct 13 2021, 3:47 pm
Sounds like lots of three year olds! Try counting or using a timer. Offer choices: would you like a pink bobble or purple bobble. Would you like to pack your bag first or brush your teeth. And do as much as possible the night before. Offer bribes too. Or races, see if you or her can get dressed first. Let go of whatever you can, if she wants to wear summer shoes or sunglasses or a swimming costume to playgroup then let her. I hope this phase passes quickly for you!!
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Oct 13 2021, 3:59 pm
thanks for all your replies! it's so comforting to know that this is regular. Thank you.

She is really yummy, I do try races or counting - but she is not interested. She will only do things at her pace...

I will try tomorrow to keep away from power struggles
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amother




Topaz
 

Post Thu, Oct 14 2021, 7:19 am
Distraction is also a good technique in addition to making things into games.
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octopus




 
 
 
 

Post Thu, Oct 14 2021, 8:19 am
I think one of my girls wore a princess crown every single day to school. I have no idea what the teacher thought...she's a teen now and she is incredible.
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amother




Clematis
 

Post Thu, Oct 14 2021, 10:26 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
thanks for all your replies! it's so comforting to know that this is regular. Thank you.

She is really yummy, I do try races or counting - but she is not interested. She will only do things at her pace...

I will try tomorrow to keep away from power struggles


Sounds like she needs some help with transition and focusing.
My 8 yo was like that. (She now gets dressed and out the door with just a little of prompting in less than 20 minutes most days. So it's just an age. It gets better as they get older)
The shoes thing is so normal. Or rather had she not done it it would have been odd. Who doesn't want to wear fancy shoes at 3? Lol!

With my oldest what worked best was turning it into a game and lots of distraction/discussion. It gets fun fit you too. Smile
Oftentimes I'd let go and let hear have her hair undone, or mismatched clothing that she chose. Cuz pink tee and pink sweats ALWAYS match, right? (She has developed a really nice taste in clothing at a very young age lol. She now knows about matching, blending, contrasts....) one time she wore her day old underwear to preschool. We live in a place (kj) where people are very "looks conscious" so it was hard. I felt embarrassed waiting for her van to show up but I knew it was the right thing.
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