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Help a plus sized women dress
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 11:41 am
I used to be slim, many years and kids later I am a 16-18. Big stomach.
I feel awful about myself and wear shlumpy t-shirts because shopping is depressing.
What can I wear to look presentable and put together? Specific links would be helpful.
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amother




DarkPurple
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 11:50 am
avenue.com im size 20
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amother




Lightcoral
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 11:52 am
No! 16-18 can look classy and even sxy. I wear a larger size. I buy only beautiful dresses and wear them every day. I spend on each item and have less: I do a capsule wardrobe and wear mostly black on bottom so I can wear dark tights and boots/ shoes in fall winter. Looks neat and flattering. I also found a top and skirt style that looks neat and flatters me and wear them on a few colors. I do not do trendy. I wear good shoes and keep them in good condition. I buy skirts that look nice even if not in style. I wear scarves and necklaces. Macys has great larger size clothes, good quality too. You can put yourself together at any size and you should. Try it with 1 outfit and go on from there.
You have the right to feel beautiful at any size.
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amother




Wheat
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 11:54 am
I am in the same situation as you. This season I told myself, you deserve to look great. And I went shopping. I am in Brooklyn so there are many stores that sell big sizes. There's also Fame on Central in Cedrhurst and Beautifull Boutique in Monsey. Both have websites. Good Luck! When you'll be wearing pretty clothes, you will feel pretty. I must say, I haven't gotten so many compliments in a long time. And it's big size clothes. But it fits nicely.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 1:05 pm
Thanks for the validation.
Can I ask for links to specific items that were flattering? Or a sense of what styles would work? I don't have a great fashion sense.
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amother




Magnolia
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 1:10 pm
https://www.apparalel.com/prod.....black
https://www.apparalel.com/coll.....black
This set looks great on me
size up for the skirt and size down for the top
I'm a size 16 and I have a medium top and 3x skirt
I played around with it, wear it with a nice necklace, a long skirt for shabbos, a diff knit skirt for weekday, it's a great, super flattering top
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amother




Trillium
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 3:58 pm
My suggestion would be straight pencil skirts on bottom, and tops that cut you down the middle (cardigans, blazers, etc) worn slightly open over shells. This look is so flattering because it visually gives an elongating/narrowing impression. As another mentioned, create a capsule wardrobe with a few pencil/straight skirts in different colors (black, brown, navy, camel, etc) and different tops to layer over shells. Add tights and cute shoes, different necklaces and scarves, and viola, you are put together and fabulous!
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amother




Strawberry
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 4:45 pm
No suggestions for clothes, but I can commiserate 😩 . Im short and bigger all over, with a big belly that sticks out. (Sorry, weight loss didn’t work and isn’t the solution here. Had to add that in b4 any ‘geniuses’ pipe up with those types of comments or responses.)

It’s nearly impossible to find any clothes that flatter me with the bigger, sticking out type of belly…it is the hardest thing to dress around! I see a lot of women our size who are able to find nice clothes that are flattering because they don’t have that sticking out kind of bigger belly (just a flatter type of belly where it’s more contained, or they’re more evenly proportioned), or they have thinner arms/legs and can compensate with that. I don’t have the privilege of that body type.
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amother




Trillium
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 5:00 pm
amother [ Strawberry ] wrote:
No suggestions for clothes, but I can commiserate 😩 . Im short and bigger all over, with a big belly that sticks out. (Sorry, weight loss didn’t work and isn’t the solution here. Had to add that in b4 any ‘geniuses’ pipe up with those types of comments or responses.)

It’s nearly impossible to find any clothes that flatter me with the bigger, sticking out type of belly…it is the hardest thing to dress around! I see a lot of women our size who are able to find nice clothes that are flattering because they don’t have that sticking out kind of bigger belly (just a flatter type of belly where it’s more contained, or they’re more evenly proportioned), or they have thinner arms/legs and can compensate with that. I don’t have the privilege of that body type.


Hmm, I hear ya...honestly, I still think you should go with a capsule wardrobe of different colored pencil skirts, and then layer specifically waterfall cardigans over shells, they are the best silhouette to compliment a large stomach. You can get them in a variety of colors, and they can be styled with necklaces and scarves as well. I would suggest that as a "uniform." And honestly, if you have a cute, shorter layered shaitel with face framing highlites, great earnings, and bright makeup, I would mostly notice your face and think you were an attractive, put together dresser. Positive attitude looks amazing on all body types, the most physically beautiful women I know are not necessarily thin.
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amother




Strawberry
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 7:29 pm
amother [ Trillium ] wrote:
Hmm, I hear ya...honestly, I still think you should go with a capsule wardrobe of different colored pencil skirts, and then layer specifically waterfall cardigans over shells, they are the best silhouette to compliment a large stomach. You can get them in a variety of colors, and they can be styled with necklaces and scarves as well. I would suggest that as a "uniform." And honestly, if you have a cute, shorter layered shaitel with face framing highlites, great earnings, and bright makeup, I would mostly notice your face and think you were an attractive, put together dresser. Positive attitude looks amazing on all body types, the most physically beautiful women I know are not necessarily thin.


I hear, but I don’t think you realize that the waterfall cardigan look only emphasizes the protruding type of belly and literally makes me look pregnant :/ As far as wearing scarves, they only emphasize my double chin and make my face look even rounder & neck shorter vs. elongated.
I already do the nice wig+great earrings+bright makeup thing. It would be nicer though if I could find clothes that are actually flattering and don’t make me look pregnant or like a weird, lumpy potato sack.
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amother




Trillium
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 7:41 pm
amother [ Strawberry ] wrote:
I hear, but I don’t think you realize that the waterfall cardigan look only emphasizes the protruding type of belly and literally makes me look pregnant :/ As far as wearing scarves, they only emphasize my double chin and make my face look even rounder & neck shorter vs. elongated.
I already do the nice wig+great earrings+bright makeup thing. It would be nicer though if I could find clothes that are actually flattering and don’t make me look pregnant or like a weird, lumpy potato sack.


You sound really attractive. I bet your "flaws" are less noticeable to others. But I get that you are the one that needs to feel beautiful to yourself. If I knew you in real life I would offer to come shopping with you until we found a good style you feel amazing in. It would be fun : )
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naturalmom5




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 7:48 pm
I was a 26/28 for many years.

Lane Bryant and Roamans always had nice stuff
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amother




Brass
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 7:59 pm
I feel for you. I weighed 40 lbs more than I do now and feel great now that I'm a 16-18. And I'm 5'4". You deserve to feel good and feel that you look good, and honor this body that's done so much.
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naomi2




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 8:07 pm
amother [ Magnolia ] wrote:
https://www.apparalel.com/products/the-infinity-skirt-in-black
https://www.apparalel.com/coll.....black
This set looks great on me
size up for the skirt and size down for the top
I'm a size 16 and I have a medium top and 3x skirt
I played around with it, wear it with a nice necklace, a long skirt for shabbos, a diff knit skirt for weekday, it's a great, super flattering top

Looks really nice. Does the skirt show a stomach bulge or is the material stiff enough to flatten it mostly?
Would the skirt cover my knees if I'm 5'4"?
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chili-n-cholent




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 10:52 pm
naomi2 wrote:
Looks really nice. Does the skirt show a stomach bulge or is the material stiff enough to flatten it mostly?
Would the skirt cover my knees if I'm 5'4"?

No it’s a really nice thick material that sits nicely, it comes in a bunch of lengths, I have the 27” in skirt and I’m 5 3”, it’s about 2 or 3” in below my knee.
(I’m amother magnolia looks like it by mistake posted anonymously)
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amother




Strawberry
 

Post Thu, Oct 28 2021, 7:11 am
amother [ Trillium ] wrote:
You sound really attractive. I bet your "flaws" are less noticeable to others. But I get that you are the one that needs to feel beautiful to yourself. If I knew you in real life I would offer to come shopping with you until we found a good style you feel amazing in. It would be fun : )

Aww thank you! 😀 I wish, it would be great to go shopping with someone who’s positive and supportive vs. fatphobic.
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cookiewriter




 
 
 
 

Post Thu, Oct 28 2021, 7:27 am
Dramanycplus.com is a new plus size frum store in flatbush very stylish comfy stuff they have Instagram too
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cookiewriter




 
 
 
 

Post Thu, Oct 28 2021, 7:28 am
@d___rama on Instagram
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amother




Mint
 

Post Thu, Oct 28 2021, 9:12 am
I'm way too traumatized to go into local Jewish stores. Tired of the fat-shaming. Although to be fair, its more like once-burned, twice-shy. Its not like I've tried so many.

I have just started to buy clothes. Even my kids commented! Like wow, you used to just wear the same t-shirt!

Anyway, I have found that the brand Eileen Fisher (I ordered from Nordstrom or Nordstrom rack) works for me. I buy sleeveless shell-type dresses and they are cut more generously and the fabric a bit thicker than the Jewish brands. Then I put a long knee-length sweater over it and feel that it skims over my body without clinging. I prefer a dress to a skirt/shell combo so that there is no break at my midsection. They also have tops that are cut more generously around the stomach/hip area.

I haven't bought a lot because they're pricey, so I re-wear a lot. I don't yet know how it will wash and wear over a few months. But I'm careful with my clothes generally so I am hopeful. It does SO much to one's self-confidence to feel good about your clothes! I really hope you find a look you love!
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amother




Strawberry
 

Post Thu, Oct 28 2021, 11:39 am
Ooh forgot to add that being short, it’s hard to look good in those generously cut dresses. They tend to be longer. Even if it’s hemmed, it still looks very sack-like and awkward. It doesn’t look as nice as it does on someone who’s 5”5 and up.
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