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Should I work FT remote, if FT in person was too hard?

 
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 5:58 pm
Once my kids came along (and they are a handful!!) I realized it's not realistic for me to work full time. I become a crazy, stressed out, neglected basket case. So I've worked part-time for over a decade. I am able to get in exercise, and an hour here and there of Me time, which are what keep me sane.
But now we are struggling to pay bills. Dh is in a position to find a more lucrative job soon, but that's unpredictable. Now that many jobs are remote, I'm wondering if a FT remote job is an option for me (30-40 hrs.) Should I consider FT remote, even though FT in-person was too much?

Here are some things about me:
Current job (office work) recently allowed me to start working from home, but severely decreased my hours to around 5-10 hrs per week.
I hate getting dressed
Love being at home
Exercise 2-3x week, done by 10:30am
Expecting a baby, and want to stay home with it when it's born. Willing to have babysitter come to house and not send out.
Need to be available to be home with sick kids, since we rely on Dh salary to pay bills, and if he doesn't go to work, he doesn't get paid.

Would love your opinions, advice, etc. Especially if you've had to make this decision too.
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amother




Aster
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 6:12 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Once my kids came along (and they are a handful!!) I realized it's not realistic for me to work full time. I become a crazy, stressed out, neglected basket case. So I've worked part-time for over a decade. I am able to get in exercise, and an hour here and there of Me time, which are what keep me sane.
But now we are struggling to pay bills. Dh is in a position to find a more lucrative job soon, but that's unpredictable. Now that many jobs are remote, I'm wondering if a FT remote job is an option for me (30-40 hrs.) Should I consider FT remote, even though FT in-person was too much?

Here are some things about me:
Current job (office work) recently allowed me to start working from home, but severely decreased my hours to around 5-10 hrs per week.
I hate getting dressed
Love being at home
Exercise 2-3x week, done by 10:30am
Expecting a baby, and want to stay home with it when it's born. Willing to have babysitter come to house and not send out.
Need to be available to be home with sick kids, since we rely on Dh salary to pay bills, and if he doesn't go to work, he doesn't get paid.

Would love your opinions, advice, etc. Especially if you've had to make this decision too.


Working full time while staying home with a baby js not sustainable imo. Even with a sitter. (Unless you have a large home and. A private home office space)
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amother




Tan
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 6:17 pm
I’ve worked from home keeping my babies home until 18 months for the past 15 yrs. 35 hrs per week.
for me it works very well.
My children and I have good dispositions for this. It’s lots of computer time with limited phone time. And phone is with co workers and not customers.
I produce high quality work and my employer is happy with the arrangement.
I could never go back to full time in office.
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amother




Bergamot
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 6:30 pm
I can’t work from
Home. Too many distractions. No disciplines. No boundaries. But you know yourself
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 7:32 pm
amother [ Aster ] wrote:
Working full time while staying home with a baby js not sustainable imo. Even with a sitter. (Unless you have a large home and. A private home office space)


Thanks for the feedback! We have a space in the basement, which is probably where I would do the work. I would only go upstairs to nurse, put up supper, maybe a load of laundry.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 7:33 pm
amother [ Tan ] wrote:
I’ve worked from home keeping my babies home until 18 months for the past 15 yrs. 35 hrs per week.
for me it works very well.
My children and I have good dispositions for this. It’s lots of computer time with limited phone time. And phone is with co workers and not customers.
I produce high quality work and my employer is happy with the arrangement.
I could never go back to full time in office.


Thanks for your input! It's nice to hear that it can work.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 7:33 pm
amother [ Bergamot ] wrote:
I can’t work from
Home. Too many distractions. No disciplines. No boundaries. But you know yourself


I hear you. Thanks for the input.
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dancingqueen




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 7:59 pm
It sounds like you are very motivated to make it work, for many people full time remote can have its challenges.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 8:33 pm
Thanks dancing queen!
I'd love to hear if anyone else has made this decision, or similar?
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amother




Babyblue
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 8:45 pm
amother [ Aster ] wrote:
Working full time while staying home with a baby js not sustainable imo. Even with a sitter. (Unless you have a large home and. A private home office space)


In my experience it actually worked beautifully, for the first year. I don't have a big house, everything is on one floor, but I do have a private office. I loved having my baby home with me (with a sitter) while I worked. I was able to keep half an eye on what the sitter was doing and I pumped and gave him fresh bottles that I had just made. If I had a break I was able to come out of my office and nurse or cuddle, wtvr. I send out at a year, once the baby is walking and actively moving around the house, bec I can't have them trying to come into my office.
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amother




Daffodil
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 8:54 pm
If you need the money than what is the question? I am always surprised by how many ladies work minimally, and then complain they don't have money. Working 10 hours won't give you a decent paycheck. Yes, it's hard to work more hours. Yes, you may not have so much "me time". But welcome to adulthood where you have bills to pay. It sounds like you can make it work, especially if you have a space in the basement, so why wouldn't you? I work 35 hours put of the house. Would love a remote option but that's not possible in my field. Of course it's hard working and juggling a family, but you do what you need to.
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amother




Babyblue
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 8:57 pm
I work FT from home, have been doing so for the past 6 years (not always FT, I've been slowly increasing my hours). For me it's been amazing and waaay easier than going out to work. Firstly, I save the travel time, which can be a significant time savings on both ends. So for the same amount of hours clocked at work, I'm that much less busy with work. Secondly, as you mentioned, I'm home if a kid needs to stay home sick (often enough with a nice sized family BH) and with my babies for the first year of their lives (with a sitter).
A lot of my work is done in real time/live online, so that structures my day automatically, I can't do other things during that time. And when I have a break, I'm home and can do wtvr I want. Make myself a fresh healthy lunch, put up - and then switch - a load of laundry, etc. I also save a lot on car expenses (gas/wear and tear on the car/tolls if that applies to you) and makeup, clothing and shaitels. I need way less dress clothes because I work from home. And I'm more comfy while working.
I also end up doing work in the evenings (the stuff that doesn't have to be done in real time) bec I don't have enough time when my kids are in school to get in the full 40 hours. But that was a choice I made, I could chose to work fewer hours and not work at night. And I also have the luxury to take off early on Friday and work on motzei Shabbos and/or Sunday night instead. Bli ayin hara its bene working very well for me and I definitely don't want to go back to the rat race that used to be working FT outside the home while running a family.

For me it's been a huge bracha and I highly recommend it...
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 9:21 pm
amother [ Babyblue ] wrote:
I work FT from home, have been doing so for the past 6 years (not always FT, I've been slowly increasing my hours). For me it's been amazing and waaay easier than going out to work. Firstly, I save the travel time, which can be a significant time savings on both ends. So for the same amount of hours clocked at work, I'm that much less busy with work. Secondly, as you mentioned, I'm home if a kid needs to stay home sick (often enough with a nice sized family BH) and with my babies for the first year of their lives (with a sitter).
A lot of my work is done in real time/live online, so that structures my day automatically, I can't do other things during that time. And when I have a break, I'm home and can do wtvr I want. Make myself a fresh healthy lunch, put up - and then switch - a load of laundry, etc. I also save a lot on car expenses (gas/wear and tear on the car/tolls if that applies to you) and makeup, clothing and shaitels. I need way less dress clothes because I work from home. And I'm more comfy while working.
I also end up doing work in the evenings (the stuff that doesn't have to be done in real time) bec I don't have enough time when my kids are in school to get in the full 40 hours. But that was a choice I made, I could chose to work fewer hours and not work at night. And I also have the luxury to take off early on Friday and work on motzei Shabbos and/or Sunday night instead. Bli ayin hara its bene working very well for me and I definitely don't want to go back to the rat race that used to be working FT outside the home while running a family.

For me it's been a huge bracha and I highly recommend it...


Thank you so much!
This is everything I needed to hear. I relate to so many things you said - travel, getting dressed, doing some hours on nights/weekends. These all seem part of the picture of how I can make this work. Thanks so much for the detail in your post.
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 9:23 pm
amother [ Babyblue ] wrote:
In my experience it actually worked beautifully, for the first year. I don't have a big house, everything is on one floor, but I do have a private office. I loved having my baby home with me (with a sitter) while I worked. I was able to keep half an eye on what the sitter was doing and I pumped and gave him fresh bottles that I had just made. If I had a break I was able to come out of my office and nurse or cuddle, wtvr. I send out at a year, once the baby is walking and actively moving around the house, bec I can't have them trying to come into my office.


Thank you! I'm so happy to hear it can work.
Love what you said about fresh pumped milk - I've pumped exclusively for a baby who wasn't nursing properly, and felt the same way about fresh milk, lol!!
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amother




OP
 

Post Wed, Nov 17 2021, 9:28 pm
amother [ Daffodil ] wrote:
If you need the money than what is the question? I am always surprised by how many ladies work minimally, and then complain they don't have money. Working 10 hours won't give you a decent paycheck. Yes, it's hard to work more hours. Yes, you may not have so much "me time". But welcome to adulthood where you have bills to pay. It sounds like you can make it work, especially if you have a space in the basement, so why wouldn't you? I work 35 hours put of the house. Would love a remote option but that's not possible in my field. Of course it's hard working and juggling a family, but you do what you need to.


I'm amazed at your strength and maturity. You're right, we do hard things if we need to.
I think it's very possible for a mother of several young children to fall apart from working full time. I won't go into my life details, but I have several strange and extremely stressful challenges that make it important for me to make sure I don't reach that point. A large part of it is making time for myself and to exercise. And to just take a slow, chill morning when I need to.
But thank you for sharing your view. It sounds like you work hard to take care of your family. May it bring bracha, health and happiness to you and your family.
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