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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:32 pm
Why is it ok? Seems to be rampant on here.. really just wondering
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SafeAtLast




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:34 pm
I guess people are more themselves when they are anonymous
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happy chick




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:36 pm
SafeAtLast wrote:
I guess people are more themselves when they are anonymous


Correct. You don't see people being not nice under their screen name. Most hide under amother.

But to answer your question, really never called for. You either answer kindly or keep moving.
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:39 pm
SafeAtLast wrote:
I guess people are more themselves when they are anonymous


But why are ppl being nasty? Why the need?? I feel like I’m talking to my seven year old- if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything. Can't Believe It
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chanatron1000




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:41 pm
happy chick wrote:
Correct. You don't see people being not nice under their screen name. Most hide under amother.

But to answer your question, really never called for. You either answer kindly or keep moving.

This isn't always true. It's hard to point it out though because giving an example would be lashon hara.
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:45 pm
chanatron1000 wrote:
This isn't always true. It's hard to point it out though because giving an example would be lashon hara.

I think from now on if anyone writes something nasty I’m gonna e the one to write - RUDE ALERT! Let’s see if that helps LOL
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amother




Kiwi
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 6:48 pm
I know. I recently started a thread about this too but it didnt get too far. The few who responded agreed it's not nice. But still the nasty comments, jumping on one word, making assumptions about poster's meaning when clearly that's not what she meant, harping on a point again and again and again, bullying even. It's very hurtful and the antithesis of what this group is about. Some people just come across as not nice.
And yes it's even under people's SN.
I so want to ask them "Is this how you respond to someone irl if they disagree with you or say something you have never heard of? If so, you can't possibly have too many friends."
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 7:18 pm
amother [ Kiwi ] wrote:
I know. I recently started a thread about this too but it didnt get too far. The few who responded agreed it's not nice. But still the nasty comments, jumping on one word, making assumptions about poster's meaning when clearly that's not what she meant, harping on a point again and again and again, bullying even. It's very hurtful and the antithesis of what this group is about. Some people just come across as not nice.
And yes it's even under people's SN.
I so want to ask them "Is this how you respond to someone irl if they disagree with you or say something you have never heard of? If so, you can't possibly have too many friends."


Exactly
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chocolate moose




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 7:23 pm
report them
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amother




Lightyellow
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 8:16 pm
You need thick skin on imamother. It's a tough crowd.
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amother




Oleander
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 8:25 pm
Legit - I wonder the same
And I'm sure it holds many people back from asking questins for fear of an attack
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amother




Aquamarine
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 8:38 pm
Is this something recent though? I come and go but don't remember in the past so many cat fights.... its embarrassing.
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singleagain




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 9:23 pm
I know. That there were a few times when. I answered rather sharply either bc the topic itself triggered me in some way or bc I was having a really bad day.

Most times I write out what I want to say. Then don't post it. Sometimes I don't think it's so bad till I see a response.

I so try to apologize or explain.

But also.. like.. I hate the word process... As in "I'm have to process my feelings" the reason I hate it so much is bc my ex used to say it all the time. But in my opinion he didn't actually do it. So I'll use the word digest... Now maybe that word has a negative connotations to someone else so when she sees it she takes offense.

Also remember tone is almost impossible to read and if you didn't grow up online then some of the native language nuance is missed. That really plays a big role in misunderstanding.
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vintagebknyc




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 9:58 pm
amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:
Is this something recent though? I come and go but don't remember in the past so many cat fights.... its embarrassing.


It's my belief it's the overuse of amother. You're less likely to snark under your own name.
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chanatron1000




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 9:59 pm
People use amother as a psychological defense against being snarked at.
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amother




Stoneblue
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 10:05 pm
chanatron1000 wrote:
People use amother as a psychological defense against being snarked at.


Agree with this. I use imamother for that reason. I didn’t even realize how true it is until I read what you wrote chanatron.
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amother




Kiwi
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 10:10 pm
amother [ Stoneblue ] wrote:
Agree with this. I use imamother for that reason. I didn’t even realize how true it is until I read what you wrote chanatron.


Yep. That's why I was amother here. Scared of someone yelling at me even so. I was quite attacked a few weeks ago on a thread and I'm still reeling since then. Not fun.
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amother




Kiwi
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 10:11 pm
chocolate moose wrote:
report them


When exactly and for what are posts to be reported?
What happens when you report a post?
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singleagain




 
 
 
 

Post Tue, Nov 23 2021, 10:21 pm
amother [ Kiwi ] wrote:
When exactly and for what are posts to be reported?
What happens when you report a post?


When you report a post a little box pups up there's a drop-down menu which asks you to check select the reason and then you can fill out additional explanation.

Then when a mod is able to she will look at the post look at the report and determine if there's something to be done.

That's either editing the post (moving the thread for instance let's say a thread was posted in the wrong forum) sometimes it's contacting either the poster or the reporter

and sometimes the mod does nothing or specifically leave it shown as reported

Sometimes especially if let's say someone wrote something nasty and someone else responded We won't necessarily change it or edit it because there are already replies in thread.

Sometimes we just don't think it's as bad to be reported

Often if we clear it without anything happening it means that we didn't find it bad enough to edit.

Sometimes we specifically leave it as reported because it's bad but not bad enough to edit.
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Jewishmom8




 
 
 
 

Post Wed, Nov 24 2021, 1:35 am
I think things have gotten worse because the culture in the whole world has become nasty.
Covid has done it.
People have been through a lot of trauma in all different ways.
and people get really really heated about the vax or about politics. all those topics are more heated than ever before.
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