Non Jewish Neighbors Babysitting?

amother

Tue, Apr 15 2008, 9:27 pm

DH and I live in a very out of town community. Only a few religious families. We live in a complex that is mostly non-Jewish. Our across the hall neighbors just offered to babysit for our kids if we ever wanted time for ourselves. At this point I don't know them too well, so I wouldn't take them up on the offer - but it got me thinking about wether or not I would be ok with non Jewish people watching my kids. I am lucky to have a Jewish babysitter.
Just note I grew up in a very diverse community and am generally not biased due to religion. But now that I have kids I wonder about what I am exposing them to. Growing up I was exposed to a lot of interesting things from my non Jewish friends -- I can say I turned out ok, but would I want that for my kids?

Love My Babes

Tue, Apr 15 2008, 9:32 pm

I think u kind of answered your own question. who knows what theyll teach your kids, or what theyll feed your kids for that matter. there's nothing wrong with being friendly, but as long as u can see how far it goes.

montrealmommy

Tue, Apr 15 2008, 9:48 pm

I think it depends. I just had a sitter for the past 2 days who is not Jewish. She is a close friend of a cousin and a young woman (21 years old) whom I trust. She doesn't say or do anything with my kids I don't specifically tell her is ok. She plays with them and feeds them the food I leave. She even reminds ds to say his 'blessings'. I think, also, if your kid(s) will be sleeping then why not take the neighbor up on the offer (of course, providing you know and trust said neighbor!)

Marion

Wed, Apr 16 2008, 6:33 am

If you decide not to allow it, will you also ensure that any Jewish babysitter is at exactly the same level as you are? Otherwise you might have someone (less observant) who brings treif into your house or someone (more observant) who tells your kids they're doing something the wrong way (or not enough, or whatever).

I davka always found the non-Jews to be much more accomodating. You tell them it's a religious thing and they learn. It's the Jews who do differently than you who try to teach your kids that the way they do it is better/right.

raizy

Wed, Apr 23 2008, 9:37 pm

so does that mean u never have a cleaning lady. nanny to watch your kids at night or day.? I am lucky to have my next door neighbor as a babysitter. but I do take my cleaning help to babysit for me. she can stay till midnight but the jewish girls usally cant. they can only stay till 9 or 10

chocolate moose

Wed, Apr 23 2008, 9:41 pm

my parents rarely went out unless we were asleep. ditto us.

maybe you arne't cfomfortable to go out much. you don'thave to, you know.

Mimisinger

Wed, Apr 23 2008, 9:51 pm

I guess it all depends on your neighbor and your relationship. In my neighborhood, we're not friends with any non-Jews. We have neighbors who we say hello to, but no real relationships.

However, if I lived where we grew up, we didn't grow up with any Jews at all really so non-Jews it was.

At this point in my life, I would want a frummie.

Helani

Thu, Apr 24 2008, 9:13 am

Also depends how old your kids are. If they still don't understand much, it's not such a big deal. If they are at the age to understand and then think about things it's much more of a problem.

Squash

Thu, Apr 24 2008, 9:32 am

I forget which tzadik it was who was asked this question by a woman (some of you more knowledgeable women, help me out here). she wanted to go to kol nidrei (I think) and wanted to leave a non jewish woman in charge of the kids, who would be asleep.

the tzadik told her not to do it. he said children are extremely impressionable. even a song that might be sund by the non jewish woman, however quietly, while the children are asleep, can have a lasting impact on a child's soul.

freidasima

Sun, Apr 27 2008, 4:17 pm

If all this is true, how can we understand how many families had "shiksas" living with them in Eastern Europe helping with the house and the children? Even poor families had an every poorer shiksa...