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Forum -> Judaism -> Halachic Questions and Discussions
Not passing things (man to woman)?



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sunflower_seed




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 6:31 pm
We are litvish and moved to chassidishe area. It happened a few times that I have noticed when a man gives something to a woman he gives it to her son and the son gives it to a woman. is it out of modesty or what is the reason. Asking for people who are not husband and wife hence no nidda reason.
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Blessing1




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 6:38 pm
I don't think this is a chassidish thing. It is assur for men and women to touch. It may be hard to give something over without inadvertently touching, so many people have the extra chumra of not giving over to the opposite gender. I myself don't give over things that I know it will be hard to give over without touching.
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Esty 4




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 6:57 pm
It's not davka chasidish. I know plenty yeshivish litvish who try not to pass
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Simcha36




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 7:03 pm
sunflower_seed wrote:
We are litvish and moved to chassidishe area. It happened a few times that I have noticed when a man gives something to a woman he gives it to her son and the son gives it to a woman. is it out of modesty or what is the reason. Asking for people who are not husband and wife hence no nidda reason.


Halacha is that during harchakos days (5+7 every month) husband and wife cant pass each other.

all kalla teachers who teach halacha teach this

Never late to learn. we are not chasidish at all
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Blessing1




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 7:04 pm
Simcha36 wrote:
Halacha is that during harchakos days (5+7 every month) husband and wife cant pass each other.

all kalla teachers who teach halacha teach this

Never late to learn. we are not chasidish at all


I think she's asking about men and women that aren't married to each others. (Or are not siblings, parent/child, grandparent/grandchild.)


Last edited by Blessing1 on Wed, Dec 15 2021, 7:05 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 7:05 pm
Simcha36 wrote:
Halacha is that during harchakos days (5+7 every month) husband and wife cant pass each other.

all kalla teachers who teach halacha teach this

Never late to learn. we are not chasidish at all

I thought op meant a man passing something to a woman who is not his wife…..
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behappy2




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 7:12 pm
Its a chumrah/geder.
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:)iknowit




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:14 pm
From what I understand a man marries his wife by giving her something (not necessarily a ring) so to prevent that from happening they don’t hand something over directly to a woman.
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sunflower_seed




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 16 2021, 2:37 am
Thank you all.
Yes meant for ppl not married to each other.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 16 2021, 2:48 am
I do my best not to touch skin to skin, but if I have to take something directly I will take one end of an object and have the man pass it over to me without me touching him (kind of like passing a baton in a relay race.) This happens pretty rarely, because there's usually a table, counter top, or other flat surface nearby.

A couple of weeks ago I tripped on the pavement and fell down HARD. It knocked the breath out of me and I blacked out for a minute. When I opened my eyes there was a man standing there, and he was obviously chiloni. By the way I had landed it looked like I might have broken something, and he said "Can I touch you?" I said yes, and he VERY gingerly poke my legs and said "Can you feel this?" I told him I could, and then he had me wiggle my toes. I offered my hands so he could pull me to a sitting position, and a few minutes later he helped me stand up.

I think he was a lot more uncomfortable with the situation that I was! I knew he was helping me because it was a case of sakana, but he was incredibly sensitive about everything.

It just goes to show you that it's not just a Chassidish, or Yeshivish, or Litvish thing. Even a Jew without a kippah, who may not even keep everything, can be shomer.
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simcha4




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Dec 18 2021, 5:17 pm
FranticFrummie wrote:
I do my best not to touch skin to skin, but if I have to take something directly I will take one end of an object and have the man pass it over to me without me touching him (kind of like passing a baton in a relay race.) This happens pretty rarely, because there's usually a table, counter top, or other flat surface nearby.

A couple of weeks ago I tripped on the pavement and fell down HARD. It knocked the breath out of me and I blacked out for a minute. When I opened my eyes there was a man standing there, and he was obviously chiloni. By the way I had landed it looked like I might have broken something, and he said "Can I touch you?" I said yes, and he VERY gingerly poke my legs and said "Can you feel this?" I told him I could, and then he had me wiggle my toes. I offered my hands so he could pull me to a sitting position, and a few minutes later he helped me stand up.

I think he was a lot more uncomfortable with the situation that I was! I knew he was helping me because it was a case of sakana, but he was incredibly sensitive about everything.

It just goes to show you that it's not just a Chassidish, or Yeshivish, or Litvish thing. Even a Jew without a kippah, who may not even keep everything, can be shomer.


That sounds like a pretty hard fall. I hope you are feeling better by now, be"H.
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