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How important is it really
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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 12:01 am
I would just say make sure at least one of the offered foods is something that you know she likes. For example, in the meatballs, rice, sweet potatoes example, if the child has NEVER eaten meatballs nor rice nor sweet potatoes then she hasn't really been given options. But if she's eaten sweet potatoes some other time and just today is throwing it while also refusing to try the other foods, then I feel a lot more secure saying that if she were really hungry she'd eat it.
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amother
Thistle


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 12:35 am
If you are on Instagram, kidseatincolor is a great resource.

Kids appetites can also change, some days they might be super active or going through a growth spurt and they can eat almost a full size adult meal. Other times they are just not that hungry and will eat a few bites and be full.

Chicken soup with the vegetables, some chicken pieces and some lokshen, is always a winner with my kids.
Other things my kids liked as toddler are fried rice, tuna patties, pasta with cheese and vegetables, thick vegetable soup with sticks of bread to dip in, scrambled egg, spaghetti bolognese, salmon, steamed broccoli, cholent…
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amother
Garnet


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 12:44 am
This is my first time posting here. Usually I just read, but with this topic, I felt compelled to comment in case one day my comments help someone.

My two-year-old almost died from a mystery illness. He went many times to the best children's hospital in our state. Tested for every cancer numerous times. Was told he definitely had leukemia all while he was wasting away every day and the tests kept coming up negative. After cancer testing came up clean, a random nurse suggested he could have vitamin deficiencies based on the symptoms. My rebbetzin told me a story about a time a similar situation reached the Lubavitcher Rebbe and he advised the parents to check their child's mezuzah and vitamins. We did, and my son had severe deficiencies. So much that it was killing him.

I should point out that my son is genetically predisposed to malabsorption issues, so he is more prone to such severity from not having a balanced diet. When he turned 2 he just flat out stopped eating fruits, veg, and dairy. Nothing we did helped. He's extremely stubborn. We thought, well, as long as he is eating something, he will be okay and we will get through this rough patch. Within six months he couldn't walk and was showing symptoms of leukemia.

I'm not saying this will happen to your child, OP, or to all the picky little ones. I am not trying to scare anyone. Like I said, my child has a genetic predisposition to the malabsorption of nutrients. I just wanted to take this opportunity to share our story on the very slight off chance it is ever helpful to someone frantically searching for answers to a mystery illness like I was. If anyone's child is showing strange symptoms, check their vitamin levels. My child is perfectly happy and healthy now. We took him to food therapy for a year to convince him to eat. It really helped.


Last edited by amother on Fri, Oct 06 2023, 4:39 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
DarkPurple


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 12:52 am
I once saw a study (maybe I'll try to locate tomw if I have time) that offered a variety of foods to young kids (Let's say around 18-30 months, I'm making up the details). They did bloodwork on the kids & analyzed their choices, and found that kids who needed iron were choosing foods with iron, kids who needed Vit C were choosing those.

However, I believe they said that if you then offered the kids junk, they'd no longer hear the messages from their bodies. (Probably read this in Prevention 30 years ago : )

Perhaps some professionals here know about such studies and can provide links.
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amother
Coral


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 9:29 am
MommyPhD wrote:
This is my first time posting here. Usually I just read, but with this topic, I felt compelled to comment in case one day my comments help someone.

My two-year-old almost died from a mystery illness. He went many times to the best children's hospital in our state. Tested for every cancer numerous times. Was told he definitely had leukemia all while he was wasting away every day and the tests kept coming up negative. After cancer testing came up clean, a random nurse suggested he could have vitamin deficiencies based on the symptoms. My rebbetzin told me a story about a time a similar situation reached the Lubavitcher Rebbe and he advised the parents to check their child's mezuzah and vitamins. We did, and my son had severe deficiencies. So much that it was killing him.

I should point out that my son is genetically predisposed to malabsorption issues, so he is more prone to such severity from not having a balanced diet. When he turned 2 he just flat out stopped eating fruits, veg, and dairy. Nothing we did helped. He's extremely stubborn. We thought, well, as long as he is eating something, he will be okay and we will get through this rough patch. Within six months he couldn't walk and was showing symptoms of leukemia.

I'm not saying this will happen to your child, OP, or to all the picky little ones. I am not trying to scare anyone. Like I said, my child has a genetic predisposition to the malabsorption of nutrients. I just wanted to take this opportunity to share our story on the very slight off chance it is ever helpful to someone frantically searching for answers to a mystery illness like I was. If anyone's child is showing strange symptoms, check their vitamin levels. My child is perfectly happy and healthy now. We took him to food therapy for a year to convince him to eat. It really helped.
Which genetics were predisposing your child to malabsorption?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 10:01 am
MommyPhD wrote:
This is my first time posting here. Usually I just read, but with this topic, I felt compelled to comment in case one day my comments help someone.

My two-year-old almost died from a mystery illness. He went many times to the best children's hospital in our state. Tested for every cancer numerous times. Was told he definitely had leukemia all while he was wasting away every day and the tests kept coming up negative. After cancer testing came up clean, a random nurse suggested he could have vitamin deficiencies based on the symptoms. My rebbetzin told me a story about a time a similar situation reached the Lubavitcher Rebbe and he advised the parents to check their child's mezuzah and vitamins. We did, and my son had severe deficiencies. So much that it was killing him.

I should point out that my son is genetically predisposed to malabsorption issues, so he is more prone to such severity from not having a balanced diet. When he turned 2 he just flat out stopped eating fruits, veg, and dairy. Nothing we did helped. He's extremely stubborn. We thought, well, as long as he is eating something, he will be okay and we will get through this rough patch. Within six months he couldn't walk and was showing symptoms of leukemia.

I'm not saying this will happen to your child, OP, or to all the picky little ones. I am not trying to scare anyone. Like I said, my child has a genetic predisposition to the malabsorption of nutrients. I just wanted to take this opportunity to share our story on the very slight off chance it is ever helpful to someone frantically searching for answers to a mystery illness like I was. If anyone's child is showing strange symptoms, check their vitamin levels. My child is perfectly happy and healthy now. We took him to food therapy for a year to convince him to eat. It really helped.


Thank you for taking the time to share this. Glad your son is ok now.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 10:03 am
amother [ DarkPurple ] wrote:
I once saw a study (maybe I'll try to locate tomw if I have time) that offered a variety of foods to young kids (Let's say around 18-30 months, I'm making up the details). They did bloodwork on the kids & analyzed their choices, and found that kids who needed iron were choosing foods with iron, kids who needed Vit C were choosing those.

However, I believe they said that if you then offered the kids junk, they'd no longer hear the messages from their bodies. (Probably read this in Prevention 30 years ago : )

Perhaps some professionals here know about such studies and can provide links.


If you can please share the link that would be appreciated!
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 10:05 am
I just want to say thank you to everyone who took the time to respond and shared advice or insight.
I really appreciate every response, and they’ve all been helpful to me.
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amother
Garnet


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 10:36 am
amother [ Coral ] wrote:
Which genetics were predisposing your child to malabsorption?


I'm not sure what specific gene is, but we found out thru his hospitalization that he has a connective tissue disorder. Something to do with nutrients not reaching where it needs to be because of collagen irregularities. The doctors told us that children who refuse to eat Vitamins BCD etc will have the same results as my son, but not as quickly, which is why I thought I would share in case anyone has a child who refuses to each fruit for a year or so.


Last edited by amother on Fri, Oct 06 2023, 4:40 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Garnet


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 10:38 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you for taking the time to share this. Glad your son is ok now.


Thank you, and you're welcome! Good luck with your little one. I'm sure she will grow out of the pickiness, but if not, food therapy was very helpful for us. People thought it sounded crazy but it really worked!


Last edited by amother on Fri, Oct 06 2023, 4:40 pm; edited 1 time in total
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 11:11 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I hear you. But she’s a stubborn little one. You’re suggesting I should let her refuse the food/not eat rather than eat a cookie?
I just don’t want her to starve. I feel like something is better than nothing. But if it teaches her the wrong message then I should probably stop giving in to her. But how does that help if she then simply won’t eat?


Are you still giving her formula or nursing? Are you giving her lots of colorful options to try? She's not going to starve herself. If she doesn't eat for 24 hours, call your pediatrician. A baby starving out of pickiness is almost completely unheard of, unless they have a neurological disorder.

The problem with giving your kids foods that are too salty or too sweet, is that those flavors reward the dopamine receptors in the brain. It literally wires your child's brain to crave certain things and reject others. The first two years are crucial for this development!

You need your child to experience as many types of food as you can. The average child will reject a new food at least 5 times before they decide they may like it. By giving a healthy variety, you are wiring your child's brain for flexibility, and openness to new foods in the future.

If you only reward the immediate pleasure centers with a cookie, why would your child ever want to eat anything else? You could set your child up for a lifetime of poor food choices, health problems, and eating disorders. Children given too much sugar at a young age are more prone to type II diabetes, because they will want sweet things more than healthy things. It becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.

Let mealtime be a fun time to explore and play. Don't obsess about it. Pretend to take a bite of her food. Make yummy noises, try to get her to giggle. Then RELAX and let her figure it out. Let her use her fingers if it helps. Sometimes a child needs to get really tactile with food before they will taste it. At the same time, make sure that they have a plastic fork and spoon to play with as well. At this point, everything is about learning.

If you waste a bit of food at this stage, don't get upset. What you are doing now is an investment in your child's future health. A half a banana thrown on the floor is OK, really.

You really need to take on eating healthier as a family. Do it for you and DH, and do it to set a good example for your child.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 11:20 am
MommyPhD wrote:
I'm not sure what specific gene is, but we found out thru his hospitalization that he has a connective tissue disorder. Something to do with nutrients not reaching where it needs to be because of collagen irregularities. The doctors told us that children who refuse to eat Vitamins BCD etc will have the same results as my son, but not as quickly, which is why I thought I would share in case anyone has a child who refuses to each fruit for a year or so.


Do you know if this is a variant of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome? The collagen thing rings a bell.

I have a cat who may have this. She's still a kitten, but she always feels like her "fur suit" is 3 sizes too big. It's like it slides around on her body, and I can pull it quite aways from her. She is also extremely small for her age, so I've been bottle feeding her soy baby formula in addition to high protein kitten food.

She's several months now, well past the age of weaning/bottle feeding, but it's the best way to keep weight on her. I'm slowly transitioning her to having her formula in with the kitten food, and adding a bit of hot water to make it all mix together.

The vet said I could pay a small fortune in genetic testing if I wanted to, but he said that managed care and having her spayed is the best way to go.
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amother
Coral


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 11:24 am
MommyPhD wrote:
I'm not sure what specific gene is, but we found out thru his hospitalization that he has a connective tissue disorder. Something to do with nutrients not reaching where it needs to be because of collagen irregularities. The doctors told us that children who refuse to eat Vitamins BCD etc will have the same results as my son, but not as quickly, which is why I thought I would share in case anyone has a child who refuses to each fruit for a year or so.
Oh is it EDS? Interesting about the malabsorption and refusing to eat certain nutrients. So do you supplement with a multivitamin?
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amother
Antiquewhite


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 11:37 am
FranticFrummie wrote:
Are you still giving her formula or nursing? Are you giving her lots of colorful options to try? She's not going to starve herself. If she doesn't eat for 24 hours, call your pediatrician. A baby starving out of pickiness is almost completely unheard of, unless they have a neurological disorder.

The problem with giving your kids foods that are too salty or too sweet, is that those flavors reward the dopamine receptors in the brain. It literally wires your child's brain to crave certain things and reject others. The first two years are crucial for this development!

You need your child to experience as many types of food as you can. The average child will reject a new food at least 5 times before they decide they may like it. By giving a healthy variety, you are wiring your child's brain for flexibility, and openness to new foods in the future.

If you only reward the immediate pleasure centers with a cookie, why would your child ever want to eat anything else? You could set your child up for a lifetime of poor food choices, health problems, and eating disorders. Children given too much sugar at a young age are more prone to type II diabetes, because they will want sweet things more than healthy things. It becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.

Let mealtime be a fun time to explore and play. Don't obsess about it. Pretend to take a bite of her food. Make yummy noises, try to get her to giggle. Then RELAX and let her figure it out. Let her use her fingers if it helps. Sometimes a child needs to get really tactile with food before they will taste it. At the same time, make sure that they have a plastic fork and spoon to play with as well. At this point, everything is about learning.

If you waste a bit of food at this stage, don't get upset. What you are doing now is an investment in your child's future health. A half a banana thrown on the floor is OK, really.

You really need to take on eating healthier as a family. Do it for you and DH, and do it to set a good example for your child.


Great post!!
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 12:25 pm
FranticFrummie wrote:
Are you still giving her formula or nursing? Are you giving her lots of colorful options to try? She's not going to starve herself. If she doesn't eat for 24 hours, call your pediatrician. A baby starving out of pickiness is almost completely unheard of, unless they have a neurological disorder.

The problem with giving your kids foods that are too salty or too sweet, is that those flavors reward the dopamine receptors in the brain. It literally wires your child's brain to crave certain things and reject others. The first two years are crucial for this development!

You need your child to experience as many types of food as you can. The average child will reject a new food at least 5 times before they decide they may like it. By giving a healthy variety, you are wiring your child's brain for flexibility, and openness to new foods in the future.

If you only reward the immediate pleasure centers with a cookie, why would your child ever want to eat anything else? You could set your child up for a lifetime of poor food choices, health problems, and eating disorders. Children given too much sugar at a young age are more prone to type II diabetes, because they will want sweet things more than healthy things. It becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.

Let mealtime be a fun time to explore and play. Don't obsess about it. Pretend to take a bite of her food. Make yummy noises, try to get her to giggle. Then RELAX and let her figure it out. Let her use her fingers if it helps. Sometimes a child needs to get really tactile with food before they will taste it. At the same time, make sure that they have a plastic fork and spoon to play with as well. At this point, everything is about learning.

If you waste a bit of food at this stage, don't get upset. What you are doing now is an investment in your child's future health. A half a banana thrown on the floor is OK, really.

You really need to take on eating healthier as a family. Do it for you and DH, and do it to set a good example for your child.


Thank you thank you!
Everything you said is GOLD! I need to reread this until I know it by heart!
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 6:00 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you thank you!
Everything you said is GOLD! I need to reread this until I know it by heart!


Just call me Nanny Frummie! Wink
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amother
Garnet


 

Post Tue, Jan 11 2022, 10:53 pm
FranticFrummie wrote:
Do you know if this is a variant of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome? The collagen thing rings a bell.

I have a cat who may have this. She's still a kitten, but she always feels like her "fur suit" is 3 sizes too big. It's like it slides around on her body, and I can pull it quite aways from her. She is also extremely small for her age, so I've been bottle feeding her soy baby formula in addition to high protein kitten food.

She's several months now, well past the age of weaning/bottle feeding, but it's the best way to keep weight on her. I'm slowly transitioning her to having her formula in with the kitten food, and adding a bit of hot water to make it all mix together.

The vet said I could pay a small fortune in genetic testing if I wanted to, but he said that managed care and having her spayed is the best way to go.


You know, they didn't say it was EDS specifically, but the description definitely rings a bell! I will look into it. Thanks for letting me know about this.


Last edited by amother on Fri, Oct 06 2023, 4:40 pm; edited 1 time in total
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