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Toilet training an older child - 4.5 yo HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!



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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:10 pm
My son is 4.5

B"H he knows how to use the toilet for urine and wears underwear at night - which he did on his own!

However, he will ONLY poop in a diaper.

This year he started kindergarten (OOT - primary in Lakewood) and he always poops in a diaper after school.

However, just last week I had to get him from school because he was crying that his stomach hurt. The teachers thought he had a virus and had to throw up, but actually he had to poop.

He refused to sit on the toilet. We have a potty and a cushioned insert that goes on top of the toilet. He says everything is uncomfortable. He doesn't like to sit on anything and he has zero patience to wait. He's a large boy, so there's no risk of falling into the toilet.

How can I help him learn to poop in the toilet?
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#BestBubby




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:11 pm
I heard of teaching kids to poop on newspaper on the floor as a first step, instead of diapers.
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amother
Amaranthus


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:15 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
My son is 4.5

B"H he knows how to use the toilet for urine and wears underwear at night - which he did on his own!

However, he will ONLY poop in a diaper.

This year he started kindergarten (OOT - primary in Lakewood) and he always poops in a diaper after school.

However, just last week I had to get him from school because he was crying that his stomach hurt. The teachers thought he had a virus and had to throw up, but actually he had to poop.

He refused to sit on the toilet. We have a potty and a cushioned insert that goes on top of the toilet. He says everything is uncomfortable. He doesn't like to sit on anything and he has zero patience to wait. He's a large boy, so there's no risk of falling into the toilet.

How can I help him learn to poop in the toilet?


So when I toilet trained dd at 3 she was fine for the first 3 wks and then fell back with going big as well. Was a very difficult yr. She would go in her pants 1-2 times a day.. over the course of the yr I had tried every method out there... then at the age of 4 when we tried again it just clicked... looking back the only thing I can say is she wasn't ready to go big cuz when it went it was bh smooth. It was a very hard yr not seeing it end so quickly but bh it passed. So sorry not much advice but I know its hard but will eventually pass.
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amother
Sand


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:21 pm
People have had success with this method. First have him sit on the toilet with the diaper on. Let him go in the diaper but he's sitting on the toilet. Then cut a hole in the diaper so it feels like he's wearing a diaper but it falls in the toilet. At that point they usually get over their fear of sitting on the toilet, of going in the toilet and they are usually ready to just use it. Do each step for a week.
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amother
Red


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:27 pm
I had similar with my son he was trained for a while but refused to poop. I think he was scared to push while on the toilet.I really tried but just couldn't get him to do it. Once when he had a stomach bug I told his to sit on the toilet and he realized it's really easy. The next few days I encouraged him to go every few hrs. with incentives for when he actually pooped and after that he forgot his fear.

Maybe give him a suppository and then put him on the toilet. Let him realize they can do it and it's not hard.
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amother
Natural


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:34 pm
I totally feel for you . My daughter is 5.5 and still will only poop in a diaper. I know how hard and frustrating it is and how much a failure I sometimes feel as a mother. We are trying the method that someone mentioned and she will poop in the diaper on the toilet. We have not been able to do it with a hole in the diaper yet. I know they say a week but that is way to short I did like a month of her just knowing she has to be in the bathroom and then a month sitting on the toilet for like ten seconds with the poopy diaper and now she will actually poop while wearing the diaper on the toilet. It's is coming from extreme anxiety and pushing and bribing and everything under the sun doesn't work. Honestly wishing you much luck and know your not the only one out there. Wish I had magic answers for you. I do think time will help but I don't know fosure. I'm greatful to be at the point where we can't at least talk about the bathroom without be a complete breakdown on her part.
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amother
Lightcoral


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 11:45 pm
I had a child like this, a few months younger than 4.5. At some point when I knew that they needed to do #2 imminently, I put them in the bathroom without a diaper and basically told then firmly that they could not leave the bathroom until they did #2. I told them I didn't care if they went on the floor or in the toilet, but they couldn't have a diaper. It took a lot of screaming and crying, but eventually they asked for their comfort object and went in the toilet. I think it was an anxiety about going #2 in the toilet, and they just had to do it once to understand that it wasn't a big deal.
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