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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
S/O bnei Brak only place boys anorexia larger than girls
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:03 pm
Because it’s the only place that boys have a huge pressure to excellence
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ShishKabob




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:07 pm
Where are you getting this from?
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:09 pm
Where do you get this info from? I don’t know the anorexia numbers but it’s far from the “only place” that pressures boys
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:27 pm
amother [ cornflower ] wrote:
Where do you get this info from? I don’t know the anorexia numbers but it’s far from the “only place” that pressures boys

I heard it in yemima Mizrachi shiur in Hebrew few weeks ago. She said it was a research. She said they are in bnei Brak hospitals
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:30 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I heard it in yemima Mizrachi shiur in Hebrew few weeks ago. She said it was a research. She said they are in bnei Brak hospitals


What was the study comparing it to? Other Israeli neighborhoods? Communities in other countries? Just hospital numbers? Where is this study published?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:33 pm
amother [ cornflower ] wrote:
What was the study comparing it to? Other Israeli neighborhoods? Communities in other countries? Just hospital numbers? Where is this study published?

Idk but she said it’s the only city in the world. Boys have a huge pressure
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:35 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Idk but she said it’s the only place on the world. Boys have a huge pressure


Really hard to make such a statement. I doubt studies were done everywhere so it’s not a scientific fact. Hard to have a discussion based on someone hearing someone say something. If I don’t see it myself I take it all with a grain of salt.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:46 pm
amother [ cornflower ] wrote:
Really hard to make such a statement. I doubt studies were done everywhere so it’s not a scientific fact. Hard to have a discussion based on someone hearing someone say something. If I don’t see it myself I take it all with a grain of salt.

I wonder if anyone else heard about this. Rabanit Yemima Mizrachi is very reliable
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WitchKitty




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:46 pm
I used to volunteer in Mayanei HaYeshua's eating disorder ward, and to me it looked like way more girls.
Anyway, what is this a spin-off of?
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amother
IndianRed


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 1:50 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Because it’s the only place that boys have a huge pressure to excellence


Um seriously, of all the world, boys have the most pressure to excel in Bnei Brak? Allow me to take that with a grain of salt.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:05 pm
amother [ IndianRed ] wrote:
Um seriously, of all the world, boys have the most pressure to excel in Bnei Brak? Allow me to take that with a grain of salt.

Learning constantly no sports to much pent up energy.
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amother
Gladiolus


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:07 pm
It's not the pressure it is that food is a tava and some boys distortedly think that eating normal is giving into tavas. Sad but they need care.
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:08 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Learning constantly no sports to much pent up energy.


That’s not a bnei brak issue. It’s ignorant to think it’s the only place in the world. I also don’t see the correlation between that and anorexia.
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amother
Butterscotch


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:11 pm
I had anorexia for a brief period of time as a young teen. Brief because I was in control for only about 6 months, then lost control and started to binge. I was unable to make myself vomit b"h so it didn't turn into proper Bulimia, but I would restrict food and then binge then repeat, so an eating disorder which is not exactly anorexia or bulimia.

Just wanted to say -- pressure to excel is definitely not the only factor. For me it was not even the biggest factor. The biggest factor for me was that my mother was horrifically overcontroling, and dieting was my outlet to control something and see results I liked. But yes, I can easily believe that many Bnei Brak boys feel sadly overcontrolled.
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amother
IndianRed


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:11 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Learning constantly no sports to much pent up energy.


That has nothing to do with pressure to excel.

I agree that system is messed up (boys need sports and downtime IMO). And maybe they do suffer from high rates of anorexia - I'd need to see the research. But it's not from the need to excel, it's from a system that doesn't give them space and time for two important things : exercise and unstructured free downtime.
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amother
IndianRed


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:12 pm
amother [ Butterscotch ] wrote:
I had anorexia for a brief period of time as a young teen. Brief because I was in control for only about 6 months, then lost control and started to binge. I was unable to make myself vomit b"h so it didn't turn into proper Bulimia, but I would restrict food and then binge then repeat, so an eating disorder which is not exactly anorexia or bulimia.

Just wanted to say -- pressure to excel is definitely not the only factor. For me it was not even the biggest factor. The biggest factor for me was that my mother was horrifically overcontroling, and dieting was my outlet to control something and see results I liked. But yes, I can easily believe that many Bnei Brak boys feel sadly overcontrolled.


Yes, this exactly. I can see that.
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amother
Sage


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 2:40 pm
I don't doubt that boys have tremendous pressure and that such pressure would manifest itself in various dysfunctional and/or neurotic ways.

What I find difficult to believe is that anorexia would be the ED that frum boys in that neighborhood would exhibit to the exclusion of other manifestations.

Anorexia is still more common in women and to a lesser extent among males for whom body image is important - but abusing steroids to bulk up is more prevalent and anorexia exists in certain sports like wrestling or being a jockey where there are strict weight limits and so boys will starve before a wrestling meet to meet the weight limits.

I am fully aware the anorexia is a complicated issue but it is linked in many ways to body images and I just don't see frum boys having issues relating to maintaining extremely thin body images in part because that is not a societal ideal for boys in the way it is for girls.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 3:03 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Learning constantly no sports to much pent up energy.
And she thinks bnei brak is the only place in the world like that?
Im sorry but if she said there was research on that, I have a bridge to sell you and anyone else who believes that bnei brak is the only place like that. Can't Believe It
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 3:19 pm
Anorexia is linked to having been a victim of s-xual abuse. Maybe they should look into that in bnei brak
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amother
Leaf


 

Post Tue, Feb 08 2022, 3:20 pm
This is absolute BS. I work in the field of eating disorders and am quite up to date with the research for eating disorders. If Rabbanit Mizrahi noticed something, that might be an observation based on one hospital visit or based on the people that she sees, but unless she did an actual research study, that cannot be quoted as fact. Does she speak with every eating disorder therapist/psychiatrist/doctor in Bnei Brak? I highly doubt it.
Eating disorders are mostly caused by genetic factors and that in combination with a restrictive diet usually causes the onset symptoms of Anorexia/Bulimia etc. Eating disorders are not caused by pressure to be thin or by the need to over control. Both of those theories have long since been disproven. Yes, most people with eating disorders have a desperate need for control and want to be thin but that’s not the actual cause for the eating disorder. If that were the case, then every single person who wanted to be thin, went on a diet or who went through trauma would be Anorexic. That is obviously not the case. Feeling a sense of control or better self confidence is usually a secondary gain and/or a maintaining factor and reason people with Anorexia don’t want to recover.
In anorexia recovery they say “food is medicine” and that’s because the primary cause of Anorexia is malnutrition. The patient’s brain physically shrinks and at that point, their behaviors are usually completely out of their control. Most people with eating disorders who decide to start recovery think it will be easy and are shocked to discover that it’s actually next to impossible for them to “control” their intake. Usually after a patient weight restores, most of their obsessive food behaviors disappear. Very often other co-occurring illnesses that were brought on by the eating disorder like depression and OCD also disappear.
The difference between a patient with Anorexia and someone else going on a diet is that when a regular person goes on a diet, the body fights it by causing extra cravings, raising cortisol levels, making you notice food more, until you can no longer sustain the diet and you probably end up binging/overeating or “cheating” on your diet. In someone with Anorexia, instead of them just cancelling the diet at some point, they get an eating disorder.
I’m sorry for my long rant but it really bothers me how little the frum community educates themselves on eating disorders and how many myths we continue to perpetuate.
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