I'm Jealous of the wealthy, all action are there...

amother

Leaf

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 8:58 pm

OK can someone please correct me if I'm wrong?!?!!?
I am NOT rich!
We hosted a stunning party which I loved preparing for, we made all sorts of meat and side dishes buffet style. We bought wine, not very expensive ones but good ones. and we had blaring music. my kids loved it we danced and ate.
We invited our family friends and it was all in all a beautiful atmosphere.
It's what you make of it!
Oh, and btw, by saying "the rich are miserable/depressed..." hello, the rich are not miserable nor are they depressed!!!
They can be rich and have a happy Purim what has one got to do with the other??!?!?

amother

Viola

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 10:00 pm

I dont understand the need to bring up the "problems" wealthy people have literally every time there's a thread like this one. They are Human beings. They have the same problems as everyone else does or doesn't. We were each given our nisyoinos, and also our blessings. Its pointless to keep thinking if only I had this or that, my life would be better. It wouldn't be. It would be exactly the way you need it to be in order to grow. That is the purpose of this world. It's temporary.

amother

Rainbow

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 11:14 pm

Didn't read all posts. My parents and grandparents are wealthy and yes there's action through the night and day. Just gonna mention the amount of broken objects and gross vomit that takes days to clean up LOL

Not complaining about it just saying.

amother

Jean

Fri, Mar 18 2022, 12:06 am

amother [ Rainbow ] wrote:

Not complaining about it just saying.

Right? I know we’re going to end up hosting at some point and not looking fwd to that. I loved coming home to an empty quiet house. If there’s ever action like this I’d consider hiring bouncers to get everyone out in time.
Tonight dh teased that he’s bringing home a group. I told him in all seriousness if a group of drunks show up at my door I’m calling the police. I then locked the door and only opened once I verified he was alone.

amother

Chambray

Fri, Mar 18 2022, 12:29 am

amother [ Leaf ] wrote:

Just to point out that many of those who are expressing jealousy or similar of the rich are poor, not just "not rich." There were plenty of times in my life where we could barely afford food for ourselves, let alone making "all sorts of meat and side dishes, good wines" for a bunch of guests.

I wish for everyone that they can be happy with their financial standing!

amother

Peony

Fri, Mar 18 2022, 5:37 am

OP I think you're kind of standing on ceremony.
If you have such fomo on Purim you should have invited yourself to your sister at least for after the meal.
Most rich people who have groups coming have an open door policy. And Purim just is that way anyways, with ppl bringing shalach manos and just hanging around.
Growing up we did not have any groups. But we went were the action is.
Just walking down the streets seeing all the funny costumes and hearing the blaring music is fun it doesn't need to be people dancing in your own house.
If you want to be part of the action you can always invite people over. They can chip in with food too, so it doesn't end up so much more expensive.
You can go to a neigboeig Rebbes Tish, even if you never go, just to get into the Purim spirit.
Purim is what you make it to be.
I never had a boring Purim.
Go where the action is.
Don't wait for it to come to you.
If you live with no Jews around, then you be the action.

sarahmalka

Fri, Mar 18 2022, 8:34 am

amother [ Hyssop ] wrote:

Am I the only one who lives in a neighborhood/circles we no one does anything Purim night? I mean I’m sure the wealthy pple or the type who are party pple have parties or whatever, but me and All my neighbors and friends don’t expect anything other than cooking /setting up for seuda/ last min Shalach manos? Like it would be super weird if pple came knocking on my door Purim night.

Same! This thread makes me so glad to live in a small OOT community.

flmommy

Fri, Mar 18 2022, 9:57 am

Do an event instead of making MM. doesn’t have to cost a lot. Give out popcorn and coffee with a table set up in front of your home. Won’t be as exciting as a bounce house and pony rides but people with stop by and hang out.

amother

Tealblue

Wed, Apr 20 2022, 9:56 pm

amother [ Chestnut ] wrote:

Why does the Dubai thing bother me so much? I have a close relative who went. I have no desire to go and yet I feel jealous. I don't want to be!

I know what you mean.

amother

Chestnut

Wed, Apr 20 2022, 9:58 pm

Bh my family is blessed and we have what we need and even moreso. But no way can we afford Dubai. But it just seems so wrong to go there and mosque tours? I don't get it. And yet I am jealous. How to get rid of this feeling?

amother

Lavender

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 12:05 am

amother [ Chestnut ] wrote:

I’m pretty sure it’s not just a Dubai issue. You need to work on jealousy and fargining others in general. it’s tough but we don’t want to cause others an ayin hora. We gotta work on our fargin muscles constantly. Try to feel truly happy for them.

amother

Dimgray

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 12:06 am

talking about the wealthy, I got together with wealthy relatives over pesach and am feeling so sad for myself that I have to work and they can afford to be a sahm, buy nice shietels, healthy foods, etc etc

good for them, but I want to be a sahm and be able to afford the basics without working my stressful jobs...

mastermom

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 12:16 am

amother [ Dimgray ] wrote:

Just realize that there's always something or someone to be jealous of. If you end up being a sahm one day, you'll find other things to be jealous about. It's a middah that we all need to work on constantly. No judgement here.

And yes, it's okay to want to be a sahm, but not because you're jealous of someone else.

amother

Dimgray

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 1:36 am

mastermom wrote:

thanks for responding and putting it in perspective....I dont think its necessarily jealousy, but I want an easier life such these women quit their jobs wen it became stressful and can still afford everything, I also want to quit my stressful job and still be able to afford...

im happy im not usually around these relatives, so its not "in my face" all the time how hard my life is compared to others...hashem can do anything...I want it for myself too...

amother

Magenta

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 2:42 am

amother [ Dimgray ] wrote:

You can join this place:

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/.....uple/

“I wake up in the morning, I smoke pot all day long,” he says. “I don’t have a clock, I don't know what day it is. I don’t have a TV, so I don’t know what’s going on in the world. It’s great.”

Seriously, if Hashem wanted us to sit around and enjoy a whole day he could have created us as amoebas or something. That’s not why we were put on this world.

We were put here to grow and accomplish, and were given difficulties and challenges that are tailor made for what we need to accomplish in life.

Given the life you now have, if you had 15 sheitels, a live in, and an unlimited budget you would come up there after 120 to find out that you missed the boat…

Aurora

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 7:44 am

amother [ Dimgray ] wrote:

Is there something small you could do that would help?

(I mean, I would love to redecorate, but that's totally not happening...)

PinkFridge

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 8:36 am

amother [ Magenta ] wrote:

Some of these wealthy frum people are leading pretty aimless lives. But so many are working hard. And the women are the backbones of the community and very busy even if they don't have an outside job.

mastermom

Thu, Apr 21 2022, 9:21 am

amother [ Dimgray ] wrote:

It's okay to want a less stressful life. It's okay to want to be able to afford things easily. That's not called jealousy. I think we can all agree that it's human nature. But the basis of your wanting it should not be because someone else has it. If all the women you know suddenly start working, you'll be okay working hard too and won't want to quit anymore?

You're right that being surrounded by people that live on a different standard is hard, because they are living the life that you dream of. But again, realize that they can be so busy looking at those with even more and wishing for that, not appreciating what they do have.