Lakewood Voice-no internet, yes $800 coat

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GLUE

Thu, Mar 31 2022, 10:03 pm

Last week the Lakewood Voice printed a story about a family that would not use the internet no matter what. There daughter just started high school and wanted a coat that costed $800. The parents held true to their values and refused to go on the internet and got the coat secand hand from a neighbor for "only" $200.

My does this story leave me with such a bad feeling?

Maybe it's the fact the the parents(who it said in the story did not have any money)were willing to pay $800 for a coat because that's what their daughter wanted. What type of story is this? Were does it end? There daughter is in 9th grade and will they keep spending money they don't have just because everyone else has.

Why did the author come up with this situation? If she wanted to make up such a story about people sticking to there guns about no internet there are a lot of other things she could have written about. Why make a story about how we must give into the peer pressure if that is what our daughter want. The message of this story seams to be, if you give into peer pressure but will not get internet, Hashem will reword you.

Does what I am writing make any scene?

amother

Seagreen

Thu, Mar 31 2022, 10:12 pm

I am no saint, but I had no problem with the story. They were NOT willing to pay $800 for the coat, nor were they willing to search online for it secondhand. Their point was that it fell into their laps from a neighbor for only $200, less than it is even available for secondhand online.

Whether or not you would spend $200 on a cost, their point was that they stuck to their principles and were rewarded. They did debate going online for the sake of their daughter as it was really important to her but decided against it and it happened anyway....not the most amazing story ever but nothing wrong 🤷🏻‍♀️

GLUE

Thu, Mar 31 2022, 10:16 pm

I guess I read it differently.

schmoois1

Thu, Mar 31 2022, 11:12 pm

I actually was very bothered by it also.
I thought it sent a terrible message.

amother

Tuberose

Thu, Mar 31 2022, 11:18 pm

Didn’t read the story.
But most of my family will not use the internet for anything. Not to save money.
While we live very different lives I respect them tremendously that they stick so much to their values and don’t cave for a few dollars.

amother

cornflower

Thu, Mar 31 2022, 11:43 pm

Reading the synopsis in the OP it sounds like the perfect representation of today’s in town yeshivish society.
Nothing wrong with not wanting to use the internet but why did it have to be based around spending money on an extra luxurious coat?

amother

Brickred

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 12:36 am

I agree, OP.

Besides, it is extremely atypical to be spending $800 on a coat! Not realistic.

SuperWify

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 12:57 am

Was the story fiction? I find that a lot of short fiction stories in frum magazines can be very flat and unrealistic.

amother

Rainbow

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 1:05 am

Were I live people will use there neighbors who have internet to help them purchase an item that requires internet, if it saves so much money . There is a thing that you pay a little extra for convenience. In lakewood colds weather this kid could have gotten a down coat. I found this year prices have gone up so$200 is on the high side of average price. $400-600 is a monclear possibly $800 makes sense to pay if your supper rich. I've seen these, and there are many knock offs on ali express. Maybe she doesn't mean a $800 coat but a knock off of a $800 coat. Coats these days have really gotten out of hand. Prices don't bother me. Just that we are expected to buy out teens a new one each year and little kids not only need matching clothes bit matching coats too!

SuperWify

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:00 am

And I wanted to add- most people in Lakewood that don’t have Internet go to Cubicles or another kosher Internet place when they really need it.

amother

Slateblue

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:15 am

The name brands and high fashion is what bothers me.
I noticed lots of high school girls wearing that coat this past winter and I think it’s very sad. I’m not saying anyone should walk around in a thin coat and freeze but honestly those coats are ugly. People just wear them to show off the name brand logo on the sleeve. It’s very sad that it’s normal to spend that amount on a coat. I cringed this winter when I spent $200 on a coat for my daughter but I would never spend $800 on a high school girls coat. It’s really sick.

amother

Khaki

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:26 am

In the same magazine there was a store advertising Chanel shoes and a Prada bag.
This is what we have come to. Materialism is pervasive and it’s up to us to fight it.

amother

Khaki

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:28 am

amother [ Rainbow ] wrote:

I got my kids nice, classic super warm coats at lands end for $35 each. I’ve also done really well at Abercrombie. Even an adult does not need to spend $200 on a coat (but I understand it more for an adult who isn’t growing and changing sizes)

amother

Ebony

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:31 am

amother [ Khaki ] wrote:

In the same magazine there was a store advertising Chanel shoes and a Prada bag.
This is what we have come to. Materialism is pervasive and it’s up to us to fight it.

Where can I get them Tongue Out

amother

Khaki

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:34 am

amother [ Ebony ] wrote:

Where can I get them Tongue Out

The store wasn’t selling them- they were pictured in an add styling their own brand of clothing. You can find them online I’m sure. Wear in good health

Notsobusy

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:36 am

amother [ Khaki ] wrote:

In the same magazine there was a store advertising Chanel shoes and a Prada bag.
This is what we have come to. Materialism is pervasive and it’s up to us to fight it.

This is the problem. That our magazines are perpetuating materialism instead of fighting it. They clearly don't have a problem telling us what they think is right and wrong. But in order to make their point about internet usage and holding your ground and not giving in, they're promoting something which a lot of us feel is also very wrong. That's what's disturbing about this story.

They could have made the story about a necessary expense instead of something completely ridiculous. And it would have been much more impactful.

amother

Khaki

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:43 am

Notsobusy wrote:

100% I agree. The magazines are materialistic too.

Simple1

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 4:54 am

It was written like a true story not as fiction.

When I read it, I did find it ironic that my daughters go to a school where internet is rampant, but don't have this name brand pressure. They did put in a sentence towards the end that said the lesson can apply to whatever principles you have and for each person that's different.

And I don't want to put down all yeshivish/Lakewood people. There are large segments that live very simply and are super yeshivish with no smart phone or internet . (Bnos Melech crowd comes to mind).

Notsobusy

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 5:02 am

Simple1 wrote:

Bh my dds' school is the same as yours. I would rather my dd ask if she can go online to look for dresses on Shein or Asos than ask to go online for an $800 coat.

I know so many simple people in Lakewood, from very yeshivish to not yeshivish at all. I also know people who would spend $200-300 on that coat, which is also expensive, but would never spend $800. It's really disturbing to me that they're normalizing an $800 coat.

mommish613

Fri, Apr 01 2022, 5:28 am

I too was very put off by the story.

I thought the overall chinuch message was terrible. It sounded like the father felt pressured to make sure his daughter didn’t feel deprived- but in a very extreme sense. We always talk about making sure our kids have an up to date briefcase and nice shoes but an $800 coat for a girl who “has a sense of style” is so so wrong. Even getting it on sale or used sends such a wrong message. It’s so sad that parents today feel so much pressure from their kids. There are so many creative ways for kids to look beautiful and put together. Teaching your kids that wearing a designer $800 coat, even if it’s fake or used, when your parents are living an altruistic chinuch/kollel lifestyle is really backwards.

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